Jealousy, competition, and betrayal amongst women…

Why is this so prevalent? Why isn’t there honor and respect, instead of jealousy, competition and betrayal, among many women?

It doesn’t matter what the age, or the circumstances, many women are jealous, competitive, and betray other women….

Look at what happened to Maria Shriver. A maid working in her home had a lengthy affair and a child with her husband and reports tell us that this woman wanted to be Maria and would try on her clothes and jewelry. Why didn’t, or couldn’t this maid like herself and her life enough to stay out of, and respect the boundaries of someone else’s?

In my life, there were two secretaries that worked for my father’s company that had affairs with my husband at the time. Sure, we know the men who do this are thinking with their ego and penisbut what about the women? One of the secretaries told others that she was going to take my husband because she wanted my life.That, of course, didn’t occur. He got rid of her. I got rid of him.

What kind of a woman does this kind of a thing? They must be full of self- hate, jealousy, envy, betrayal and a ridiculous kind of competition. If more women refused to compromise themselves, their values, and self-worth, men wouldn’t be having as many affairs. There would be fewer women to have them with.

I have sisters. If I share about my life, some  of them will say that all I do is talk about myself. If I don’t talk much about myself, and only inquire about them, some of them will state that I am being nosey, not being friendly, and not sharing about my life. There is no way to win. They will be jealous and create competition where none need be… why is this?

At one time, I had a stepdaughter, 8 years-old. She and I were very close and got along well, but still she would show jealousy of my relationship with her father. It was ridiculous! She would flirt with him in front of me, taunting him to choose whom to give his attention and it was so silly to observe, but also irritable, hurtful and damaging. She would hug his neck and stick her tongue out at me at the same time.  Where does this come from…this competition among women?

One of my best friend’s husbands come onto me and I shut him down fast. Even if I had been attracted to him, I never would have gotten involved because it is against my nature to do this kind of a thing. I have never had an affair. I would consider it betraying not only the woman, but myself.
I honor myself and who I am too much to betray my soul.

Is all this jealousy, competition and betrayal because many women have no respect for themselves, so they sure don’t respect others? So, they will steal, lie, betray, and harm other women to ‘make’ themselves feel ‘important’ or ‘valued’ even if it’s only for a short while, when in actuality they are devaluing their self-worth. Does it all boil down to self-worth and if so, why do so many women have so little?

Men don’t have respect for the women who do this. How could they? You can’t respect someone that compromises their self and without any glimmer of honorable values. The men are just using them for their ego and penis needs. Sure, the men ‘may’ have ‘some’ affection for them, but usually the men turn against, or away from these women as soon as they are found out. Do you think if Maria divorces Arnold that he will marry his ‘ex-maid, mistress’? Laughable, isn’t it? 

Look at all of Tiger Wood’s mistresses… is he with any of them?

So, let’s discuss… why so much competition, jealousy and betrayal amongst women?

Descriptions of Evil…Is it taking over?…

Description from the DSM IV About Socio/Psychopathy & Narcissism Descriptions of Evil
(Lucifer, Satan, etc.)
Grandiose, self important and pre-occupied with self Wants people to worship him
Fantasizes about power, brilliance, success, and money Says to God “I WILL ascend, I Will Rise…” Showing power fantasies
Requires excessive admiration Says “You WILL bow down to me”
Is entitled Wants the same power as God, feels he’s as powerful as God
Exploits all relationships Tries to lure others to do his dirty work in the world
Lacks empathy Envious of others
Arrogant Fails to follow laws or rules/uses unethical, unlawful and immoral behavior
Deceitful, lies, cons for fun or profit Impulsive, wants it/takes it, sees it/does it
Aggression Disregard for the safety of others, puts others at risk
Irresponsible–bad with supporting others Lack of remorse, rationalizes stealing, lying, etc.


Description from the DSM IV About Socio/Psychopathy & Narcissism Descriptions of Evil (Lucifer, Satan, etc.)
Pretends to be wonderful, helpful, supportive Masquerades as the ‘Angel of Light’
Powerful Often beautiful or handsome; Lucifer called ‘the most beautiful’, name means ‘the shining one’
Superior attitude towards others Is superior to other angels in power and authority
Contempt for others especially authority figures Fights against God and wants His power
Use power and authority over others Called the Prince of Power
Prideful Heart is filled with pride and contempt
Splits people against each other Turned 1/3 of the angels against God and took them
Often rejected, expelled, dismissed, broken up with because of behavior God expelled him from Heaven
Places are created to contain them: jail, prison, mental institutions, probation God created a place to contain him in the future–Lake of Fire
Fights against any rules and others who try to make him conform Fights against God to ruin and hinder His plans
Destroy and deceive others (and enjoy doing it) Called ‘The Destroyer’ and “Deceiver”
Masquerades as anything you want him to be Masquerades as the ‘Angel of Light’
Likes to scare others and show power so others fear him Prowls like a roaring lion
Looks for someone to overpower and control Prowls like a roaring lion looking for someone to devour
Bold, cunning, self ambitious Boldness, subtlety in his cunning
Self willed and strong prideful self will
Narcissistic wanting to be better than everyone else Said “I will be like the Most High”
Fakes being wonderful, helpful, virtuous Many false prophets have gone in the world (like him), performs lying ‘signs and wonders’
Accuses others Called ‘The Accuser’
Adversary, enemy to any who turn against him Called the Serpent or ‘Adversary’
Liar, tempter, thief Referred to as a liar, thief and tempter
Motives are destructive to others Motives are to deceive and afflict

After reading these descriptions, think about our leaders, people in the public eye, associates, etc…

What do you think, is evil becoming more prevelant?

Make yourself happy…


Smiling has a positive effect on your mood. Also a smile is infectious. When you smile, it will lighten your mood along with the mood of others.

Get Out of the House

Being cooped up in the same environment can cause feelings of isolation and depression. Change your surroundings and get a breath of fresh air. It can snap you out of a mood fast.

Soak Up the Sun

The vitamin D provided by the sun along with other benefits boosts serotonin levels in the body. Even just 15 minutes of sunlight will immediately aid in lifting spirits.

Reward Yourself

Allow yourself a pat on the back for the challenges that you have overcome. Celebrate your victories, no matter how small, in order to rejuvenate yourself for future battles.

Pamper Yourself

Indulge yourself with something that lifts your spirits. Like a hot bath, a pedicure, a massage, or an ice cream cone…. do what makes you feel satiated and pampered to improve your mood.


Shake things up in your environment. Altering your environment can change your perspective and leave you feeling more open and hopeful. Move things around. Shift your environmental energy.

Accomplish Something You’ve Been Putting Off

Procrastination can contribute to feelings of negativity. To finish something that you’ve been avoiding will give you a sense of accomplishment and raise your mood instantly. Clean out that closet, rearrange your drawers, attack the papers on your desk…

Douse Yourself in Inspiration

Who inspires you? Reflect on and read about people and circumstances that reflect strength and faith. This will inspire and fill you with a renewed sense of purpose.


Exercising releases endorphins, it is a quick way to make yourself feel good. It also makes you feel more powerful, alive and youthful, which are key ingredients to feeling happy.

Do Something Good for Someone Else

Get out of your own head and give yourself a fresh perspective. Brightening someone else’s day will make you feel better about yourself and happiness is contagious.

Count Your Blessings

List everything that you are thankful for. It is easy to take your daily blessings for granted and lose sight of what you have. Celebrating and appreciating your life will open you up for more.


Laugh as much and as many times as the opportunity presents itself.. Act silly, make up and tell jokes…

Behave Like A Child

Swing on a swing. Jump rope. Sing songs. Play charades. Lay in your yard and look up at the sky and imagine what the clouds look like.

Have A Happy Day!

Women are crazy, drama queens!…

I hear this so often from men. So, you’d think that there must be a lot of crazy women walking around. But even as often as men say this, I meet few crazy women. I meet more emotionally shut down, non-communicative men.

Sometimes, men that can’t understand a woman’s emotions call her crazy and drama queen, when perhaps, he just needs to understand what she is expressing. He might want to listen to her, to feel and get in touch with his emotions.

Also, sometimes, in a relationship, the women expresses all the emotions because the man is so shut down. He projects his emotions and feelings onto her as if it’s a weight for her to carry, until she can’t carry it any longer and explodes… hence DRAMA!

A man sure likes feminine emotions and drama when sex is involved. All of this is a part of a woman! It all goes together…  a man can’t just have one part and not all…

A woman is emotions and that, perhaps, is why a man is drawn to her. She helps him to process his emotions and through this they can connect strongly. Then if he protects her and creates a safe place for her, they may be able to create a solid and unbreakable emotional strength in their connection.

Sometimes, someone who is upset reacts to little things because they are not being understood on larger issues. Men that deem women ‘crazy’ and ‘drama queens’, I have found just don’t want, or don’t know how to communicate with her… so they step out of it and distance themself and call her names.

So, I may seem ‘crazy’ at times, because I am full of passion and drama, and if you can’t handle it then you can’t enjoy the wholeness of me… if you know what I mean?!

Do you know what I mean?! Are you listening to me!?

Vaginas… and other female sexual…


A man has a penis and testicles, but a woman has a vagina, clitoris, uterus, and breasts… and all are glorious. I know! I am a woman. I have the pleasure of them all.

They can produce intense pleasure and, at times, discomfort, even pain as in menstruation and child birth.

A woman’s  sexual and reproductive organs are more complex than a man’s. Perhaps, that is because a woman is more complex than a man.

Except for her clitoris and breasts, her sexual organs are internal. They are made up of flesh, muscle and nerves. Her breasts and vagina are soft and inviting. Her vagina is soft and moist and if she allows the wrong penis into it, she can contract diseases that can render her infertile, lead to cancer, and life long issues.

A woman allows a man into her body… into her inner sanctum and this privilege should not be entered into lightly by her, or her partner.  A woman gives a man a wonderful gift when she allows him to enter her. And she might want to be very selective concerning to whom she gives this privilege…

Since a man’s sexual organs are outside his body, perhaps, that is one reason that he can separate his emotions and feelings from the sexual act. An emotionally healthy woman will feel a connection to a man that she allows to enter her. It’s innate to her nature.

Some women and it seems more these days try to behave like men and have many sexual partners and behave promiscuously. They ‘ think’ that doing this gives them ‘equal rights’ and sexual freedom. I think it makes them stupid and distances them from their mind, body, heart connection.

Some women experience great sexual pleasure and can experience orgasms in their clitoris, vagina, uterus and also  their nipples. Some, when she feels totally relaxed, and safe with her lover, can achieve pleasure repeatedly in one session.

Life enters the world through a woman’s vagina… it is the sacred canal of birth.

So, sex, while pleasurable, loving, romantic and fun… also can create life. In this knowing, it should be taken with  caution, respect, and reverence as to why it was created and what it creates.

Sex is wonderful!  It is as close as a man and woman can get in the physical and it is an expression of love. It can even be a spiritual experience and a deep connection when shared between two people in love.

Shame on men that con with words and use manipulation to get a woman to open herself up to him for his pleasure with no regard for her feelings and emotions… Some men are so needy and desperate to enter a woman and to experience her inner power that they will lie, rape, manipulate and even pay for it.

And stupid is the woman that allows a man to enter her for reasons other than the affection of two people caring for one another..

Shameful also is a woman that uses the power of her womanhood for false and ill intent to beguile, mislead, and seduce for reasons other than sincere love and affection. And a woman that ‘sells’ her body, I have no kind words for…

It is fun to have pet names for private areas with your partner. But in my opinion, some words used today such a VayJJ and booty call are tacky and common and even disrespectful.

A woman’s body is curvy and mysterious, soft, round and angular! It is to be honored and respected for the work of art that it is…It is one of God’s  most mysterious and beautiful creations…

And having sex with the right man can be heaven on earth! I love being a woman!

What say you?…

A penis is only as good as the man connected to it…

???????????????????????????????And what a man does with his penis reveals the kind of man that he is and his innate character…

If a man allows his penis to control him, his actions, and his life, he will end up a loser with a life in destruction.  A man under the control of his penis is a man with no control over his life, who he is, where he is going, or what he becomes. And, of course, morality  is nowhere to be found.

He is being controlled by his sexual urge and he is out of control. How laughable does this make him? HAHAHAHAHA! Very! He is a joke on himself and on his very manhood! He brings shame to his family, children, and anyone that associates with him.

He is a sexual urge driven animal… He contracts diseases and spreads them around. Who would want him?

Just like a person that can’t control their eating urges becomes a fat, bloated, slob… so does the man who allows his penis to control his life.

His life becomes an out of control, urge-driven mess.

A penis is an organ of muscle, ligaments, and flesh… and it should be controlled by the man, if the man is a ‘real’ man. The other way around and he is an out of control ‘penis’. How attractive is a penis without a man to control it? It’s not! It’s pathetic!

A man of class, morals, with his urges under control, with the ability to love, in touch with his emotions, and who connects with a woman in respect and honor for the sexual experience… honors himself and whomever he interacts with and he is a blessing to others and also to himself.

A man running around controlled by his penis is a blight on his family, the world and ultimately himself. A real man is not controlled by his penis!

Any man that thinks his penis is his manhood is a fool. And any woman that engages with a needy penis is a fool, especially if she betrays another woman to do so…

It’s the brain and the heart where two people connect. A man that connects through his heart isn’t owned by his penis.

Sex is an expression of love in the physical and to diminish it to mere ‘sport’ where cheating, betrayal, dishonesty, disrespect, and the heart of others are players and pawns is the sport of fools.

What is happening with so many men these days? These out of control penis controlled slobs! Who would want one?!

Agree or not? Thoughts…

Look to the left and click to follow…

I can relate with Maria Shriver….

 I don’t agree with her politics, but as a woman, I understand the pain that she is going through.

My first husband, whom I met in college, appeared a ‘nice’ and, at that time, a fairly attractive man… (kind of a young Newt Gingrich, big cheesy grin and big head) cheated on me with his plump, ordinary appearing secretary, while he was working for my father’s company.  Everyone knew, but me. I was teaching ballet and doing the ‘wifey’ thing. ‘I’ was a member of a country club and my husband used the membership to play golf. I watched our budget, while he gambled away money on football games…and ‘played’ at being a big shot.

I thought about divorce. I was not happy, but I kept trying to be the ‘good wife.’ I had many opportunities to cheat, but never did, or would. Cheating on someone you love, to me, is the lowest of low. I always wanted to be married and to have a family, but after observing my husband’s drinking, gambling and general behavior, I knew that I didn’t want to have children with him.

It reached critical mass one Saturday. I was sick and he was playing golf at the country club. He came home and I asked him to get me some 7Up and chicken soup from a restaurant that I liked.

While he was gone, the phone rang and a woman asked me, if I recalled who she is, and I didn’t, until she reminded me that she used to be my husband’s secretary.

“Your husband has a son and I am the mother.”

I laughed as I responded, “What?!”, thinking this plain Jane, plump girl … my husband wouldn’t have anything to do with you…

“It’s true.”, she said, “Ask him when he gets home.”

Of course, he denied it.

He told me that she was trying to extort money from him because of my family. He blamed everyone, but himself. But he never blamed me. He told his parents, “If Ann doesn’t get into heaven no one will.”

I tried to believe what he told me. I was in shock for months.

He paid off the secretary to drop her child support charges, and he signed away all rights to the child, to try and get me, to believe that it wasn’t his child, but it was.

Maria ShriverDuring this ordeal, I lost tons of weight.. so stop saying that Maria looks like a scarecrow.. she can barely eat. She is grieving her dream because it has been shattered.

And this secretary was just the tip of the iceberg… as it played out, my husband had affairs, even while we were engaged, with everyone, and I mean everyone. And I never knew it, or even thought this could happen, even as bad as I was realizing he was, I never could’ve imagined how bad!

So, why did he cheat on me while professing to love me? The day I kicked him out of the house with his golf clubs, he was still professing his love for me, as he shouted it out from the front walkway, “I always loved you!”

Was it because I was ugly, not good in bed, my body wasn’t good enough, not a good wife, not a good enough housekeeper? What was it that was so bad about me that this poor guy had to stick his needy penis into everything with a skirt? 

While. the best thing, I can say about his love making is that he was inept and clumsy….And this is one of the reasons that it was difficult for me to believe that he had affairs. He had grown to have a fat belly and was not attractive physically.. while I was a physically fit ballet dancer…

So, why did he cheat, and if he wanted out, why didn’t he ask for a divorce?

The reasons, it was his nature. He is a gambler, a cheater and probably a sociopath. He was using me for his ambitions.  While my intentions in the marriage were honorable, his weren’t. My intellect was more than his, my morals and everything else. He was from the ‘wrong side of the tracks’, as they say, and he should’ve stayed there.
He liked being with women that he ‘felt’ better than.

I should’ve never married this man and I had second thoughts even the night of the rehearsal dinner. I should’ve listened to my instincts and cancelled it all.
I diminished myself in order to make him feel good about himself because that is what a ‘good wife’ does, right?

I found out that he told someone before he married me that he was going to marry a girl from a wealthy family. I made him look good. I helped bolster up his low self-esteem, while all he did was tear mine down…

He forced the divorce to court out of his greed and arrogance, but I was awarded the divorce on exteme mental cruelty in a no-fault divorce state. I was awarded all that was left of our property which meant I was left pretty much broke.

Men like my ex-husband are without a moral compass. They only care about their ego needs and satisfaction in the moment.

Also, a week after I kicked him out. I went to the mailbox and there was a card addressed to him. It was from a ‘flight attendant’ he was having an affair with… so even as he was telling me that he wanted to stay married and was telling me how much he loved me, he was having yet another affair…

So, was all this my fault? Is what happend in Maria’s situation her fault? She is attractive, accomplished, talented and from a prominent family.

No! It’s not our fault! It’s the cheater’s actions, lies and corrupt morals that create these situations.

These ego-driven, self-serving child-men are plain losers.  No matter what their accomplishments, if they destroy and hurt their loved ones because of their ego needs, they are plain selfish. There is no excuse. They are liars, sinners and their wives have no fault to bear.

And yes, I understand that there are women who cheat, but I am not one of them.

Cheaters disgust me…What say you?

When did you realize that the people you thought…

had the answers, don’t? And not only that, but very possibly, you know as many answers as they do.

When did you realize that the people ‘in charge’ are not all that ‘in charge’, or all that bright, or all that wise, or all that intelligent, or all that good? And that those that ‘act’ like they have all, or most the answers, just may know least of all…

What if you realize that those you thought knew some, or all of the answers, don’t know anymore than you do?

What does it feel like when you realize this…when you see behind the curtain…?

Is this just a part of growing up? Do you think that we all come to this awareness eventually?

Have you come to this realization and if so when?

Or are you still looking to others for the answers?… 

If you or someone you meet seems to crave a relationship…

is it because of? 


All people, regardless of gender, can “smell” desperation—and trust me, they’ll run from it. If you get into a relationship quickly with a desperate type, they may turn on you as quickly as they came after you, when they feel like they ‘have’ you.

 Low or No Self-Confidence…

Again, most people pick up on it and don’t want it in their life. Healthy people want a partner, not a project, and having to constantly give approval, or reassurance to someone who has no self-respect, or confidence becomes draining fast. We all have low self-confidence, at times, I am talking about an innate lack that permeates relationships.
Commitment Phobia

Oddly enough, it tends to be this type that can’t hold a relationship and who seem to have no idea why. They blame the other person but…When we don’t trust others, and we’re afraid of committing, we’ll not only attract the same in return, but we’ll sabotage good things, usually by nitpicking, or setting unattainable and completely unreasonable standards. Examples: I don’t like the way they dress, they like different things than I do, so we aren’t a match, etc.) These people can’t accept the normal ups and downs in getting to know one another and the normalcy of the times when you don’t feel as connected. It takes an internally secure person to connect with another.

Being able to love and be loved requires first that you love yourself. Otherwise, you’ll become a black hole; no matter how much attention, or care someone pours into you, it’s either never enough, or never from the “right person, or not done right, good enough, or long enough.” I think you get the picture…
If you tear yourself into shreds, I can only imagine how harshly you criticize others. Picky people may criticize and ask lots of probing questions, when it’s themselves that they aren’t sure of and don’t know. When you learn to love and accept yourself, you also start seeing the world and other people through different eyes.

Anyone who “needs” to be with someone tends to be in only one of two modes: namely mourning the loss of a relationship, or chasing after one. Neither is the reason to be in a relationship. Plus, you give away all your power, either to those who don’t deserve it, or by creating walls so high that no one can overcome them. The truth is that if you expect the worst, you’ll get it.

Be cautious around those who obviously seem to “need” relationships.

Those who are going person to person and/or move on, or cheat as soon as things become difficult. These people are internally insecure and very well maybe co-dependent. They just appear to be more independent by constantly being with someone new. Either way, the vibe they give off is the same, and a functional, healthy relationship will not come from behaving in any of these ways.

My suggestion would be to surround yourself with honest and caring people, who are preferably drama and mostly baggage free. You can learn from observing them and how they interact with others. 

Ask about how you are perceived and suggestions as to what you can do to overcome the obstacles. Be open to their advice, even though it might sting. Hopefully, you don’t choose friends who want to deliberately hurt you, or don’t care. Good friends and genuine people will be honest. But consider the source for any type of feedback, before you discard a friend, simply because they may have told you something, you didn’t want to hear.

Craving is what an addict does…
NEED is what an addict feels… and this is what drives them..

The more clearly that you see yourself, the more able you will be to love another and more able to create a lasting, enduring relationship.

Don’t We All?…

 I was parked in front of the mall wiping off my car. I had just come from the car wash and was waiting for my wife to get out of work. Coming my way from across the parking lot was what society would consider a bum.

From the looks of him, he had no car, no home, no clean clothes, and no money. There are times when you feel generous, but there are other times when you just don’t want to be bothered. This was one of those, “I don’t want to be bothered times.”

“I hope he doesn’t ask me for any money,” I thought. He didn’t. He came and sat on the curb in front of the bus stop, but he didn’t look like he had enough money to even ride the bus. After a few minutes he spoke.

“That’s a very pretty car,” he said. He was unkempt, but he had an air of dignity about him. His blond beard kept more than just his face warm.

I said, “Thanks,” and continued wiping off my car.

He sat there quietly as I worked. The expected plea for money never came. As the silence between us widened something inside said, “Ask him if he needs any help.” I was sure that he would say “yes”, but I held true to the inner voice.

“Do you need any help?” I asked.

He answered in three simple, but profound words that I shall never forget. We often look for wisdom in great men and women. We expect it from those of higher learning and accomplishments. I expected nothing but an outstretched grimy hand. He spoke the three words that shook me.

“Don’t we all?” he said.

I was feeling high and mighty, successful and important, above a bum in the street, until those three words hit me like a twelve gauge shotgun.

Don’t we all?

I needed help. Maybe, not for bus fare, or a place to sleep, but I needed help. I reached in my wallet and gave him not only enough for bus fare, but enough to get a warm meal and shelter for the day.

Those three little words still ring true. No matter how much you have, no matter how much you have accomplished, you need help, too. No matter how little you have, no matter how loaded you are with problems, even without money, or a place to sleep, you can give help. Even if it’s just a compliment, you can give that.

You never know when you may see someone who appears to have it all. They are waiting on you to give them what they don’t have. A different perspective on life, a glimpse at something beautiful, a respite from daily chaos, that perhaps only you can help them see.

Maybe, the man was just a homeless stranger wandering the streets. Maybe, he was more than that. Maybe, he was sent by a power that is great and wise, to minister to a soul too comfortable in himself.

Maybe, God looked down, called an Angel, dressed him like a bum, then said,

“Go minister to that man cleaning the car; that man needs help.”

Don’t we all?

~ The author is Nathaniel Bronner, Jr., who has a daily inspiration “Wings Over The Mountains of Life. ” His website is well worth the visit and is located by clicking…