Those moments and times of perfection…

…how  wonderful and fleeting they are. You know those moments and times when the house is clean – all errands done – everything is calm and peaceful in your world as you sit in bed sipping iced coffee in calm – talking to loved ones – etc.  Or cooking, as you  create a meal for those whom you love while sipping wine – sharing and talking . Or after a vigorous workout when your physical, mental, and emotional bodies are drained and cleansed  with endorphins flowing. Or after making love to the person you love laying peacefully together. – eyes meeting – skin touching breathing in sync.  Or watching a sunset – walking beside the ocean as the waves pull in and out.  Sliding into clean fresh sheets after a long day or getting out of a warm shower – wrapping a big soft towel around you – all clean and relaxed. It’s peace. It’s calm. It’s goodness, happiness and  complete joy all wrapped into one! It’s Heaven on earth. These are some of the kind of moments that  are perfection to me.

We all have our variations of the perfect moments in time.  Those moments that ‘still us’ into what it means to be truly happy, peaceful and content. Those moments for the most of us have to do with people – the giving, loving and sharing, our communication of self and gifts of self to others.

Then the world shifts – something breaks – the car – the dishwasher – there are more errands to do – things to clean and wash – irritating even horrible news about something happening in the world, a tooth aches, tummy hurts  and the moments and time of perfection  seem to fade way even to cease – as a seemingly irritating kind of hell emerges –  as we do what is needed to  try to make our way back to that place of peaceful wonderful.

We live on a planet of dualities – good and evil – nothing stays the same – it shifts and moves from pleasant to troubling – perfection to irritating – it always has and always will. And realize it or not – this is a positive thing – this shifting and changing from peace to turmoil is what keeps us striving for more of the perfection of the peaceful good. Striving for the good – those moments in time of perfection – can be a wonderful stimulus for experience, learning, growth and change. So actually, it’s all good – all  in the perfection of God’s earth. Therefore, love your peaceful perfection as well as  the perfection of your irritating, struggle, challenging and striving turmoil. I know and  well understand, easy to say when all is well, and not so easy when all is out of whack and in turmoil. Never the less, try to recall  and know – because this too soon will pass — Our perfect moments help us to keep on going through the irritations, pain – hell. And our challenging times help us to be grateful for the times when we are in joy and bliss – our individual Heaven on earth.

It’s all as God planned it – just for you. It’s why we are here on earth.  A book to read for awareness, processing and healing as we travel through this challenging and wonderful life. It’s available on Amazon, Barnes and Noble – all the usual places and also available on the front of this site.

https://www.amazon.com/Daddy-Throws-Air-Ayn-Dillard/dp/1619848031/ref=sr_1_1?s=books&ie=UTF8&qid=1532879066&sr=1-1&keywords=Daddy+throws+me+in+the+air 

Satan uses PC to manipulate and pervert…

creating the atmosphere for good to be deemed evil and evil to be deemed as good.

Satan is the master of illusion – delusion, projection, manipulation and confusion.  The nature of ‘political correctness’ is to not call out something that which it actually is – in order to not offend. What this has led to is calling  evil good so as not to offend evil and that which is perverted, banal,  lies, corrupted and of sin. So that the perverted, sinning, corrupted evil will not feel badly about itself concerning the evil they are doing or the lifestyle they have chosen to live. Because, oh my gosh! We wouldn’t want to hurt the feelings of sin and evil that would be such a horrible thing to do. Good can’t ‘judge’ evil that would be so politically incorrect.  So instead we don’t call it out for what it is, but either ignore it or deem it acceptable as we suppress that which is of good. Having good hang its head in shame for deeming evil for exactly what it is.

When good does call it out as sin, evil and wrong, evil will point the finger back at good and loudly over shout – calling good a hater –  along with statements such as “Don’t judge me!” You see evil must shout louder, be more seductive, offer goodies and treats to those who succumb to its enticements. Evil will blocks and censors good – anything to shut good up – so evil won’t be called out and have to look at self and be held accountable for its evil deeds of corruption and destruction. You see, it’s much more difficult to be good than it is to be evil. Or so it seems – but actually goodness, internal peace and happiness go hand in hand. And this is something that irritates the hell out of evil…

So evil projects itself onto good to try and shut it up. Clever nasty evil knows what it’s doing. While good being the good, not wanting to hurt feelings, many times will keep quiet or shut up – in order to be politically correct. You see evil is manipulative and cunning, While good is straight forward and working always on being good – evil is plotting and planning how to corrupt good for the benefit of evil.

One perfect example of evil projection are the Clintons:

Just look at this quote from Hillary. She is a liar and she pretends to be something she is not – yet she is stating that this is what the American people are doing.

Trump on the other hand just blurts the truth of what he sees  and feels right out there. He knows he’s not a perfect man and  doesn’t pretend that he is and is not afraid to show who he is or to throw it in the face of evil.  And the evil corrupted media and those on the side of creating the ‘image’ of guide behind which lies delusions and illusion for the gain of evil and perversion – go wild with projection.  Evil hates good. Good understands the weakness of evil – and that weakness is being called out for what it is. Evil loves a fake image and a facade to hide its evil deeds and doings behind.

Good is choice. Evil is of control. Good is truth no matter what the truth might be or how difficult it might be to hear and know. Evil is lies, cover ups and facades. Good is continually looking at self to reevaluate and refine self and isn’t afraid of truth. Evil runs and hides from truth. Truth scares the hell out of evil! Hence the creation of political correctness. 

Evil  creates the environment where truth cannot be revealed much less told, where evil and perversion cannot be called out for what it is. It creates a playground of confusion – a marring of the lines between good and evil and it’s in this atmosphere evil is able to sneak in and tighten its grip on the innocent, the youth and to corrupt the souls of the weak, lost and wondering.

Leviathan is the devil of deceit, corruption and confusion and this is the time in which we are living in.  And the corrupted media along with political correctness is Leviathan’s sharpest tool.

Good must STOP evil in its tracks! Throw political correctness to the four winds. Call out that which is evil, corrupt, perverted and manipulative – deeming it exactly what it is! Why should ‘good’ care if it hurts evil’s feelings? Evil has no empathy or feelings of care for the good. Evil wants the good corrupted then destroyed. Evil is happy when it corrupts an innocent child into sexual exploitation or perversion, Evil is happy when it addicts human beings to substances that harm the body,mind and soul. Evil is happy when it sucks resources and money from those who work hard for it. Evil is happiest when it gathers more souls into it’s lair of pain, depression and despair. Evil loves company.

I I say PC needs to die and evil needs to be left alone to wallow in its pain and isolation.

 

The Grass Is Greener….

Really? Are you so sure about that? We all have the tendency, at times to think the grass is greener in someone else’s life or that if we could only have this, do that, achieve thus and so – then our life would be wonderful and we will have ‘arrived’! Really? Arrived – where?  Anywhere you go – there you will be. And do you really think having that car, purse, or dress, etc. will change who you are or make a difference in who you are or how you feel about yourself – for long? Whatever you put on your body – you are still yourself inside.

Have you ever envied someone else’s life, only to realize when you get to know them  –  Whoa! I am so glad I am me and not them.

Appreciating who you are, where you are and what you have is the greatest awareness. It’s called acceptance, peace, happiness and inner joy.  It’s called  being in the moment – being in present time – and that is  the real gift – the ‘present’.  You are where you are in any given time for a divine purpose and reason. It’s your life in that moment of time to fully feel and to enjoy.

This does not mean that you stop trying to achieve, grow, do and have, but that you be in the moment, satisfied and appreciating of all that you have and where you are in that particular time – in the now.  Life can always change for the good, or for the worst – in an instant. If you aren’t able to experience the joy in and of the moment then you will not be able to feel fully satiated no matter what you have, do or gain – you will always feel lack. longing and wanting of more or something else to try and fill up the empty hole that you have inside yourself.  You will always be thinking the ‘grass is greener’. A person who does this is not able to settle into peace with self.

Things don’t give you peace. Things don’t/won’t fulfill you for long – they will always leave you wanting for more, different or newer.

Someone who can’t feel settled in self is always thinking that the ‘grass is greener’.  That there is something out there somewhere that they need, just must have in order to feel ‘okay’, or better about themselves. They can’t, – are unable to settle into peace, appreciation and joy because they are too busy being on the prowl looking for something else to fill them up.

Not being able to settle in self may  actually cause them to  lose all that they do have  – to be lost – never to be realized again.  As in a man who cheats on their spouse, ‘thinking’ the pretty little thing that caught their eye is what they ‘must’ have to feel happy and content,  only to lose everything that means any and everything in the world to them – then to realize  that pretty little thing is nothing much at all – just a momentary shiny new thing.

Those who  are always looking for the next shiny thing – end up going through lots of tinsel… without  ever holding onto  or having a real diamond in their hands for long –  because they may drop the diamond to chase the tinsel.

Those who think the ‘grass is greener’ have  little to no balance in their lives.  They are in a pattern of dismissing & diminishing what it is that they do have – no matter how great it actually may be. – they can’t see or appreciate it  because they are always on the search &   looking for more, next, another, or what they ‘think’ is  ‘better’ to fill up their empty soul. They do this because of their dissatisfaction with self.

Joy happens when you can appreciate and live in the moment. Joy is the awareness of the moment  and being in appreciation for all that you have – that what God has placed before you is yours – it’s your perfect place to be!

Did you ever stop to think that while you are thinking the ‘grass is greener’ that someone is looking at you – your life – your wife – your house – etc. and thinking the ‘grass is greener’ where you are?

Your life is ‘your’ gift from God – whatever – where ever – it may be or is. It’s yours. So appreciate the good and the bad – because it’s  all yours.

How about stating in this moment – I approve of myself. I am all that I ever thought I would or could be in this very moment.  I am blessed. Thank you God for all that I am, all that I have, all the lessons, all the trials, all the awareness, all that I have become and all that I will be.  If you can’t/don’t appreciate the moment without the wanting, even yearning for more – you will never experience contentment, peace and joy.

Then carry  forward  from that point – creating, learning, etc, while  making sure to appreciate what you are  and have in the now,  the people in your life etc. in this time frame.

For awareness … DADDY THROWS ME IN THE AIR – memoir/self-help 

on Amazon, Barnes & Noble and all the other usual places.

You were born  and placed exactly where you were meant to be. Your circumstances and experiences are perfect for you and who you are meant to become. It’s up to you to either break against or immerse yourself  – change – grow or become more – most importantly to become more aware. It’s your  life. This moment is yours! Be aware and be in joy!

https://www.amazon.com/Daddy-Throws-Air-Ayn-Dillard/dp/1619848031/ref=sr_1_1_twi_pap_1?ie=UTF8&qid=1529383520&sr=8-1&keywords=Daddy+throws+me+in+the+air&dpID=41Ym6dKOKtL&preST=_SY344_BO1,204,203,200_QL70_&dpSrc=srch   

Two-faced, smile to your face, talk about you behind your back…

Polite and nice to money. Rude otherwise and looks down upon, even shows disdain for those with less than, or in poverty.  Judges people by their car, house, clothes, etc.  instead of their character. They don’t even know what ‘character’ is  because they have none – so they can’t recognize it in others. Will do anything – lie, cheat, steal to achieve the image, position or appearance of control or power over others. Mistakes having power and things as greatness.

Say one thing then  they do another. Say words or act in ways to manipulate for their use or gain. Nice, courteous and kind to people when selling something – be it a service or a product but uncaring, dismissive even rude otherwise. try to extract value for self from people, places and things with no regard to what they might do to harm.

Men who tell  lies to get a woman into bed. Women who flirt and compliment to make an oaf feel like a king for her gain – doing so, only to manipulate and with ill-intent instead of worthy intentions.

I have observed and become more aware of  this kind of behavior in our world today. This is why, in my opinion there is so much depression, anxiety, addiction, harm to self and others. There is a lack of respect for our fellowman and  ultimately ourselves.

I am otherwise, I was taught otherwise and choose to live otherwise. My words and behaviors reveal who I am, not only to others but to myself.  My word is my honor and my bond. I can be counted on to do what I say, or I don’t say it. So many people these days cannot be counted on for anything much less their word.

What I do in private, matters as much as what I do in public. Of course, I have been known to say what I think – which means, I don’t lie to myself or others.  There are  these concepts called – truth – honesty –  responsibility and accountability.

I try to live by the golden rule. “Do unto others as you would have them do unto you.” Do I lose it at times and mess up? Of course! But this serves me also,  to become more aware of my behaviors and how they may affect others including myself. It’s called ‘self-reflection’ and ‘self-awareness’. We won’t grow, if we don’t have both in our emotional and mental selves.

If we are not becoming more aware in our lives, then what is it we are actually doing? Accumulating stuff – screwing as many people as we can – and on multiple levels –  taking  instead of giving? Look into the eyes of people who have done this in their life even for their entire lives with little to no awareness.  Oh, then of course, some know exactly what they are doing and these are the evil ones. And these people  have dead eyes which reflect their internal selves

Look at the eyes and faces of the Clintons – they are perfect examples. Bill is only 71 and he looks as if he is 171. 

Today so many seem to live by the motto – ‘Screw others before they screw me’.  They will say  or promise thus and so and if they are lying or change their mind and it inconveniences or harms another — so what? Their motto is –  ‘It’s ‘me’ that matters, not them’. What value can I extract from another. They are all about self and this is why they are so internally twisted and unhappy, seeking any and every thing to numb out their torment and misery.

We have become in many ways a selfish, narcissistic society. And that is why so many are unhappy, turn to drugs, alcohol, stuff their selves with food, buy too many things, sit on the sofa watching TV or playing computer games, watching porn, having sex with people only for sex, stare at their phones – texting or surfing the internet even when in the company of others.  Living behind a facade of cars, clothes, fitness routines  – so concerned with ‘image’ – they forget  their internal/eternal self – when reality is – nothing is fit or right about them. Or  they may live in a fat, unkempt body, wearing ill-fitting sloppy clothing, lazy and slovenly  while, thinking nothing matters,  including their appearance, while being envious even hating those who appear they are ‘really together’ – but  who inside may be also dying.

There is a concept called balance – both  inside and outside. The inside will reflect on the outside in some manner or form.

Those who indulge in these behaviors ‘think’ they are putting something over on everyone  else, but what they are really doing is harming themselves, even going as far as to be rotting their soul. Who – they are conning – is themselves. They are choosing to live by no standards, disaplines or morals, but that of self-gratification and all this does is to make a person selfish, self-centered, internally alone, even though they may be surrounded by others – bloated and fat – possibly catch STDS for having sex with many – and because of selfish self-indulgences  they lose their ability to love and care for others and therefore, lose their own individual humanity, just for the purpose  and sake of their momentary attainment and  pleasure of fake power and things. Image is actually nothing. It’s the internal reality that matters.

When you are true to yourself is when you will be true to others. and this has to do with integrity in body, mind and spirit and this comes from continual awareness of self as it relates to others and your relationship with yourself. Self -awareness and self-reflection are keys to happiness.

A book to assist in awareness:

 https://www.amazon.com/Daddy-Throws-Air-Ayn-Dillard/dp/1619848031/ref=sr_1_1_twi_pap_1?s=books&ie=UTF8&qid=1528307660&sr=1-1&keywords=Daddy+Throws+me+in+the+air&dpID=41Ym6dKOKtL&preST=_SY291_BO1,204,203,200_QL40_&dpSrc=srch

 

Censorship and bullying of conservatives by …

Facebook. Image result for photos of mark zuckerberg testifying

On FB lib/dem/progressives post horrible things about President Trump, our First Lady, members of the first family, etc.  And nothing is done. But if a conservative posts their opinion about Michelle and Barack Obama,  the Clintons and the way lib/dem/progressives  act and think they are censored and put into FB jail. This is unAmerican. It’s against First Amendment Rights and FB does this all the time.

Zuckerberg states that he created this platform for people to connect – well, it appears only if you think and post as the Facebook regime agenda allows you to.  FB is a socialist/communist/progressive site under the’guise’ of getting people to connect.  Actually, it is a site to implement their agenda, to brainwash and try, even force those who think differently to change and adapt to their bullying and censorship or be kicked off.

Here is the exact post I was put into FB censorship jail for 30 days:

Ayn Dillard

“Think of the progressive/dem/lib platform.. tear down and change for their use and gain from that which they envy and can’t be or become.That is a real hater – then they deem everyone else haters.. I have never seen or experienced such hate as when Obomo was in his tear down mode of America and all moral values. Africa is always having some civil war – gangs are always fighting.. that is how those of that ilk move through life.. Look at what Moooo is out saying now.. that she is the ‘forever’ first lady.. that is obscene and is how a dictator thinks and talks.. Obomo and Mooo are a stain on America. They are both evil and evil in their intent.. They are un- Amercan and should be arrested, imprisoned, executed or exiled with all resources taken – Same with Clintons – they all sucked money off the American people.. They are destroyers and takers.. the real ‘haters’ .”
This is how most all conservatives think. This post  was liked and shared repeatedly on FB. So FB decided to take it down and put me in their censorship jail for writing my opinion and what is actually truth. While at the same time, I get continual emails from FB asking me to promote articles and posts that are doing well – even for this same post I am put in jail for.

Hillary – the eternal victim…

Hillary played/plays the role of victim her whole life.

She tried to blame others – as in the ”great right-wing conspiracy” for the reason her husband, Bill Clinton, was outed for his sexual escapades – but oops!  His sexual crimes against women were/are true. BLAMING  and LYING were her tools used at that time, in order to play the victim. VICTIMS BLAME OTHERS FOR THEIR PROBLEMS IN LIFE.  They don’t  accept responsibility – they blame, project, lie and deflect! Hillary is a master at this.

The poor victim, Hillary, stayed with Bill during and after his sexual escapades were outed – with her complete and full knowledge of – so she could try to become the first woman president riding on his political coat tails.  BUT she failed at being elected president, not only once, but twice. The ceiling Hillary has busted through is being the biggest VICTIM on the planet – while truthfully it’s all her fault that she is such. She writes books about her victim position – asking WHY? WHY? WHY? She blames everyone and everything else – but not herself – as she lies, blames, manipulates and deflects.

She could have divorced  Bill and continued life on her own  taking responsibility making her a brave, strong, self-sufficient woman. Instead, she stayed with Bill and sucked off the American people even creating a ‘foundation’ which kept/keeps most the money for themselves and their over-the-top affluent lifestyle – as they con, manipulate, and suck off anyone they can find. The pretense is a bit of good which hides much deception, evil and greed – to feed and justify their victim mentality. She creates victims and preys on victims. She thinks she is a victim.

After Hillary lost the presidency, she could have gracefully accepted the outcome. Displaying responsibility  honor, integrity and grace (which we know from her previous behaviors, she carries none of these attributes in her psychological make-up.) Hillary’s psychological make-up is that of a victim to stay whining, blaming, deflecting, lying and manipulating  in order to stay in  the forefront and  she will not stop or go away. She will do anything even murder.

Victims never accept responsibility. Instead, they hide and dodge. Hillary has helped to create a herd of victim women followers who  follow her lead as they whine, blame, deflect and even wear pink vagina costumes. – looking not only the victims but the fools!

Victims are the greatest stealers of everyone’s energy – they want the whole world to feel pity and sorry for them – as they try to gain, take or steal any and every thing  they want or ‘think’ that they need to feel better about what they ‘think’and ‘interpret’ is their ‘victim’ status in life. Victims suck the life out of the room and everyone who surrounds them.  Their goal is pity as they seek even demand ‘power’ over others to give them undeserved gains on many levels.

Hillary promotes ‘women’s rights and equality’, while she lives  her life the exact opposite. She stayed with a womanizer, rapist, cheater and blamed the women who called him out for what he did. The women standing up to Bill Clinton were/are the strong ones – not Hillary.

Hillary Clinton is a self-made victim. Her personality is VICTIM! Everything that comes out of her mouth is victim driven.  Those who wear the cloak of victim try to use it  for their gain. They are actually weak, immoral, corrupted in their soul – real losers. Hillary Clinton is a self-made/created victim sucking off America and the whole world. Hillary is on a constant and continual victim tour. 

It would serve Hillary and her victim followers to read – 

Challenges, problems, losses, pain, disappointments help a person grow, become stronger, develop new skills and most importantly become aware. Without all these, there would be no growth. We are on the planet of dualities – good and evil. There will be challenges, problems and pain. It’s how a person handles issues in life that make them who they are – either to rise up, become aware, develop character, strength and knowledge, or to fall into being a victim, stuck in negativity, limiting imprints and negative emotions that block their growth, awareness and ultimately their happiness and peace. Victims easily fall into addictions and the repeating of WHY? WHY? WHY ME?!

https://blog.womenexplode.com/2018/02/why-so-much-anxiety-depression-mental-illness-addictions/

So deemed ‘bad’ things happen to us all. It’s how we process them that make us either a victim or a strong, healed, self-actualize person. To assist to shift your awareness out of victim status — order. 

Dillard/dp/1619848031/ref=sr_1_1_twi_pap_1?s=books&ie=UTF8&qid=1522603193&sr=1-1&keywords=Daddy+Throws+me+in+the+air&dpID=41Ym6dKOKtL&preST=_SY291_BO1,204,203,200_QL40_&dpSrc=srch  

Sugar is Salt! Excerpt from DADDY THROWS ME IN THE AIR…

I am twelve or thirteen… 

It is April Fool’s Day!  What a blast!  This is the day you can play all sorts of tricks on people.

My friend Linda is spending the night.  We’re going to plan some really neat tricks to play on my parents.  My parents don’t laugh much and I think some tricks might make them laugh and have some fun.

We’re going to wait until they go to sleep.  Then sneak up to the kitchen to figure out the best tricks that we possibly can, to make my parents have a fun April Fool’s Day.

Linda says she has played tricks on her parents and they always thought the tricks were funny.  So we decide we might play some of the same tricks on my parents. Since she tried them out on her parents, we know that they’ll work.

Everyone in the house is asleep but us.  We slowly climb up the stairs to the kitchen.  So we’ll have just enough light to see what we’re doing, we turn on the light in the pantry. We snoop through the pantry looking for ideas.  Okay, what shall we do?

Linda says the first thing we can do is exchange the sugar for the salt.  She says that her parents thought it was funny when she played this trick on them.

Cool idea! We pour the sugar out of its container then fill it with salt. We’re giggling.  Can’t you just see their faces when they put salt into their coffee.  Okay, what else can we do?

The first thing, my parents do when they get up is to have their coffee.  So, what can we do to the coffee?  What looks enough like coffee that we could make an exchange without there being any notice?  Nestle chocolate drink mix?  No dirt, dirt would work!  We’re amazed by our clever ideas.  We sneak outside through the back entrance to scoop some finely ground dirt out of the flower bed.  We sprinkle the dirt into the coffee container laughing as we do.  This is going to be so cool!

Linda comments, “Your parents are going to just die when they drink their mud coffee with salt in it.  It’s going to be so funny!  They’re going to laugh their heads off!  Now what else can we do?”

I’m beginning to feel uneasy about all this. “I think we have done enough.”  She responds, “No we haven’t!  I bet we can think of a lot more funny April Fool’s things to do!”  I say, “No, this is enough to do.”  She says, “What a party pooper, you are!”

We run back downstairs full of excitement for what tomorrow will bring when my parents wake up to their April Fools surprises.  Linda and I stay up real late watching the late shows on TV.

The next morning, we’re sleeping very soundly, until we hear blood chilling screams coming from the kitchen.

My mother sounds hysterical.  She’s screaming and yelling for my father to come into the kitchen.

I wake up startled and quickly.  My heart jumps into my throat.  I freeze up inside. Oh, no, apparently my mother doesn’t think our tricks are funny. Please, God, don’t let mother yell and scream in front of my friend.

Linda and I sneak up the back stairs to the kitchen.  We wait and listen.  My father comes into the kitchen as my mother is screaming and telling him about her coffee.  She’s actually almost crying.

My father yells for me.  I’m scared to death.  What can I do?  What’s going to happen to me?  I was only playing a joke!

Linda looks frightened, too, but she says.  “What’s the big deal?  It’s only an April Fool’s joke.”

We muster up our courage and walk the rest of the way up the stairs to the kitchen.  We nervously say, “April Fools!  Did we surprise you?  Pretty good tricks, huh?”

My mother is hysterical and crying.  She’s going on about how her coffee is ruined and what a brat I am.

I say, “Mother, it’s only a joke.  We were just having some fun.  I thought that you would laugh and think it was funny.  It’s April Fool’s Day, you know, the day when people play jokes on people.”

My very angry crying mother says.  “Not only did you ruin my morning cup of coffee!  Now, I’m going to have to pour all of the coffee out because you put dirt in it.  You are a brat!  My whole day is ruined because of you!”

My father is trying to go along with my mother’s angry tirade, but he’s chuckling under his breath.  He comments, “The kids were just trying to do some tricks.  Relax, it’s no big deal. We can get more coffee.”

When my father says this, my mother just glares at me and I feel a chill go down my spine.  I feel my mother’s hate for me.  I feel how she cannot stand it when my father sides with me.  She wants to always make sure that I get into trouble and that my father is aware of how ‘bad’ I am.  She likes to make a scene and make sure I get punished.

So she continues to rant and rave, until my father finally gets angry and yells at me.  He yells his usual things about what a naughty brat I am.

Linda and I both apologize then go back downstairs.  We only meant to have fun and make jokes but what we did was make my mother upset.  Nothing we did turned out to be fun.  It was upsetting for all of us.

When I look back at this scene, I can remember the excitement I felt wanting to create some innocent fun for my parents and me.  I was trying to reach out and touch them in a ‘fun’ way.  It made me excited to hear that my friend’s parents responded to her jokes in a positive manner.  It gave me hope that my parents might respond in the same way.  I hoped that my parents would laugh and say what a funny idea.  Then we could all have a good laugh together and feel close to one another, but as usual with my parents, nothing seemed to get the reaction that I was looking for.

As an adult, I can understand that it must have been frustrating for my mother to endure muddy, salty coffee.  I am sorry that I upset her and that she did not appreciate my April Fool’s joke, but looking back, I still think it was funny.

My awareness is that my mother and father never do appreciate my sense of humor.  It is like we are on a different wave link.  Most of the time when I am teasing or trying to be funny, they take it as though I am being serious then I get into trouble.

I do not show my sense of humor to them anymore. I am tired of being criticized for my humor and my light heartedness.  I show my humor and fun side to people who will enjoy and appreciate it for what it is. The sad thing to me is that I feel like I cannot be myself when I am with my parents.  I feel like I have to watch everything I say to them for fear of being criticized.

My awareness is that I can always be true to who I am but can show different sides of myself to different people as is appropriate to do so.

All of us have different ideas of what we think is humorous.

Some people do not seem to have any sense of humor. Then I’ve met others who thought they were funny and I did not get their humor at all.

Every one is an individual and what is funny to one may make the other one cry.  The awareness is to see humor from both sides.  The perspective a person is coming from decides whether they will think something is funny or not. We all have varying degrees of sensitivity. Humor is based on an individual’s perspective.

“Men are disturbed not by things that happen, but by their opinion of the things that happen.” Epictetus

To order:

Useful idiots!

This is what the fake, lying ‘bought and paid’ for media wants and this is what it creates – people who can’t think for themselves and who ‘believe’ what they are told by the media and read on social sites that it is truth and fact when it’s  lies, fake and propaganda.

The creation of useful idiots is the reason lib/dem/progressive social media sites are banning and censoring conservatives – Christians – heterosexuals – and white people.  They don’t want the truth or opposing views to interfere with the propaganda and brainwashing of ‘their useful NWO – take away all rights progressive idiots’.

A perfect example of useful idiots is the women who march for women’s rights wearing pink – even with vaginas on their heads.linda-sarsour-anti-trump-womens-march-washington-dc-january-21-2017-hamas-islamic-terrorism They are also for more mooslems and refugees moving into America. Islam gives women little to no rights. Linda Sarsour marches for women’s ‘rights’ while wearing the oppressive head gear of islam – ‘Sharia Law’ –  promotes few rights if any and oppression for and of women. She has ties to the Islamic terror group HAMAS. Anyone who believes or follows this woman is being played big time as an ‘useful idiot’. The MO of Islam is pretend you  are for connection and the same life and rights, in order to infiltrate then take over, convert, take away all rights and destroy.

Another example –  lib/dem progressive homosexuals who promote and stand by mooslems. In islam homosexuals are tortured and murdered – often thrown off buildings.  So these ‘useful idiots’ are actually protesting for their own demise. Now there are some real  idiots for ya!

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Then the ‘school age’ kids who are protesting against guns and against the NRA – even blaming the NRA for the shootings. Some of these kids are ‘bought and paid’ for talking head – protesters. Paid  by those for the agenda of the NWO under the rule of the UN for the weakening and destruction of America.  NWO edicts – after taking control of the media to spew propaganda and brainwash –  next is to disarm. This begins with one kind of gun then onto another, until they all are confiscated.  Then the masses become sitting ducks easy to be taken over and completely controlled if not exterminated.  The NRA had/has nothing to do with the shootings. A gun is an object. It’s the person using it who makes it either used for good or for harm.

School children are being brainwashed instead of being taught to think and are being used as ‘useful idiots’ before they even know who they are or what they really think and they certainly don’t have any idea what life is about yet. This is right out of the communist playbook and is evil brainwashing control of  the youth.

Those overcome with ‘political correctness’ are creating censorship and are trying to curtail rights of all individuals to express themselves. They curtail the First Amendment for those in opposition to them – which is not the intention of this Amendment – which is equal rights for all. While lib/dem/progressives march, protest and whine for their free expression, they are trying to shut up anyone who thinks differently than they do – now, that is a real useful idiot of double standards!  Because as soon as their NWO regime is put into place no one including them will have any rights. Rights will all be under the rule of a few – NWO under the rule of the UN along with all property, resources, media, schools, etc. It will be hell on earth.

So if and when these ‘useful idiots’ disagree with the new regime – what they helped create – they will be censored and done away  with –  because then they will have no use any longer! By taking others rights away to implement their agenda – they have also done away with their rights and freedoms – truly idiots of the highest order. All dictators and those of communistic/progressive rule depend on the brainwashed, non- thinking useful idiots to do as they are directed and do lots of the indoctrination and work for them – while they sit back, make promises and live a life of freedom and abundance -while laughing at  how stupid are and how easily they were able to use – the ‘useful idiots’.  

The useful idiots created by the media, the social-unrest agitators,  the liberal educators, the dem/lib/progressives, the hate America, the mooslim influxors, the refugee lovers, the everyone is the same – there is no difference in the sexes propaganda and BS – are protesting and actually demanding their own demise and freedoms to be taken from them. But they are too much of an idiot to realize what they are doing, or to realize that – all they are is useful idiots!

Violation of First Amendment Rights…

Facebook – and others are censoring conservatives at their whim and at rapid pace for doing little to nothing. Some in social media do not want the truth out or any differing opinions that do not support their communist/progressive, NWO agenda. Therefore, ‘FB jail time’, blocking and banning are happening more and more often.

FB put me in jail for 30 days for a post that I wrote years ago and it was not anything but my opinion about how ‘some’ homosexuals behave which is my right to have and to express. So now, FB is going back in time to find anything that they can to shut  up conservatives, Christians, white people  and heterosexuals.  Anything  against DACA, Muslims, Sharia Law, illegals – post anything about an aspect concerning gun control, homosexuals, transexuals, women’s march – women who wear vaginas on their heads – being in support of President Trump – anything against Hillary, Dems, progressives, NWO are deemed as going against ‘FB community standards’. While FB allows verbal abuse of conservatives from terrorists,  gays, dems, muslims, lib/dem/ progressives, etc.  and allows them to post horrible even threatening things and not be censored. FB allows all sorts of perversions to be displayed and if you are against them – you are thrown into FB jail and ‘punished’ – censored – as if you are some school child.

Censorship for agenda must be stopped. It is against our First Amendment Rights and is why our forefathers stated it as such – in order to curtail censorship for agenda before it begins and to allow freedom of speech for all – not just a few.  When people are not allowed to express differing opinions then we are under a communistic rule and dictatorship coming from some in the social media, etc. 

Political correctness is nothing but Censorship.  ‘PC and so-deemed hate speech’ are being taken way too far and being used as control of free expression and free speech.   It’s for the evil agenda of perversion and control of the masses.  FB  even wants an app for children – so their agenda can be imprinted as early as possible – so addiction to technology and  that brainwashing can begins earlier and earlier – the sick twisted desire of rule, dominate and control to implement their agenda over the masses.

FB should be cited, sued, fined, etc. for curtailing freedom of speech and expression.  According to Zuckerberg, FB was started as a place for people to communicate and share expression. Now, it’s become a place to promote Zuckerberg’s agenda as he censors anyone against it –  curtailing FIRST AMENDMENT RIGHTS for those ‘they deem’ going against ‘their agenda’. FB is un-American, about control and about ‘their’ agenda while they make money off ‘everyone’ who uses their communistic-run site. People are punished at FB’s whim without due recourse or way to communicate. Those in protest are not even listened to – I have contacted FB hundreds of times, after I have been thrown in ‘their FB censorship jail’ and no one  ever responds.  zuckerberg resolution 2017 mark 5 1500x1000Being on FB is like North Korea –  being on there, we are under the dictates of a  wimpy little dick-ta-tor of control, arrogance and agenda. Zuckerberg is now creating a household computer- ‘butler’- like robot and he has made it so that it only listens to his voice and not his wife’s. This man is an out-of-control dick-ta-tor and needs to be thrown in jail for being a traitor to American freedoms.

Facebook and Mark Zuckerberg are a menace to a free society. He curtails freedom of speech and freedom of expression and uses his site to promote progressive communism  to try to weaken America, flood her with illegals, muslims  and refugees who hate our country, in order to created chaos – thus enabling  the progressive agenda of control to insert a weakened America into the NWO under the rule of the UN – where all rights will come through them and they have control over all earth’s resources, land, property and people.   Completely against freedom – all about the evil of control. 

Boasting, bragging, nosy, controlling people…

Blowhard : someone who always brags or boasts about himself. He is also a braggart, bragger,  vaunter, etc. Blowhard is an informal word describing someone who can’t stop talking about themselves or their accomplishments either real or imagined.

Just recently, I interacted with one of the biggest braggers I have encountered. I met her online. She approached me – concerning my book.  She thinks she knows everything about everything. She asks intrusive, nosy and rude questions and if you don’t answer them , she gets offended that you don’t give her all the info she seeks. She talks about money all the time – what car she drives –  how big her house is – if you mention any topic, she knows more about it than you or anyone else does – and all her ‘friends’ or associates are ‘experts’ in their fields and according to her – ‘know more about anything than anyone else’. Her children are the most accomplished and her husband the best husband in the world – HA! As she continued her BS – I realized that she knows little to nothing about much. She refers to everyone as her ‘besties’ – including me and I just met her – never met her in person and have no desire to do so. She uses emoji’s like some child – like 10 of them with every post or text. Always trying to draw attention to herself. She hides behind the mantel of being a Christian – when her behavior is any and everything but. I tried to give her the benefit of my doubt but my first instincts were correct – so I cut my interaction off with her – but not fast enough. She is a people collector – a sucker of energy. A vampire – searching for prey. 

A person who brags, is a person who seeks external validation since the individual cannot self-validate. The individual doesn’t find or have the inner resources to validate himself. Bragging and boasting implies an inferiority complex.

Braggadocious people are usually also controlling – they want to control the conversation and make it and everything else all about them – what they own – what they do – who they know – what they know – how much money they have. They try to control the conversation in order to get information about you or others.  They ask intrusive nosy questions to find out where they can suck, take, or use against you. Nosy in order to glean information for them to use against you or to put you down when they need another boost for their fragile insecure ego. They will eventually use your vulnerabilities against you in some form or another – even if it’s only to feel better about themselves and to get  or for them to think that they have the upper hand. Many braggers have sociopathic and narcissistic traits.

They try to connect to people with success, money, accomplishment or  some sphere of influence – so they can add them to their arsenal of what ‘expert’ friends and associates they have – in order to have more to brag about – even if it’s only by association. They collect people as if they were things.  They ‘think’ that associating with others of accomplishment will rub off on them – they even take others accomplishments and try to make themselves part of it – trying to take the accolades from someone and trying to make themselves appear that they assisted in someone’s success. They many times exaggerate, if not actually lie and many live way above their means in order to keep up their fake image and facade of – ‘I am – oh so wonderful, happy and great – above all others!’These people are innately insecure and  severely lacking internally.

Wouldn’t it be absurd if Einstein tried to show off concerning his intelligence? We all know he is a genius. Einstein received external and internal validation. People with  accomplishment, be it wealth, accolades, intelligence, happiness, beauty, etc. – don’t need to brag or boast about it – it just is. They are who they are and others sense who they are by their actions, words, behavior and lifestyle –  no need to brag or boast – because who they are  emanates naturally from their pores.

Steer clear of those who are boastful, braggarts, nosy, controllers – who ‘think’ they know everything – who don’t listen, don’t self-reflect about how their rude, intrusive, arrogant, boasting affects others and can’t be shown or taught self-awareness or much else – they will usually take advantage of you,  if and when you don’t go along with their plans, do as they deem, or  they realize that you see through them – they may even try to take from you and do you harm when you don’t give them what they want or need from you.

Realize when you feel more than or less than others – you are not feeling equal to…

A book to assist  – read with self-reflection, honest comprehension and you will grow more  in awareness.

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