All posts by ann888

EXPLOSIONS, Inspirational/Spiritual, Irony, Self-help, Women In Real Life

Bring back shame and humiliation…

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???????????????????????????????It seems any and everything are being accepted as fine and ‘okay’.

Everything has become so wishy-washy… no morals, standards, values, manners, class, appropriateness of dress, behaviors, etc..and our world shows it more as each day passes…

Morals, standards, guidelines, tradition, and appropriateness give a society boundaries to follow and boundaries are good. Sure, it’s interesting and fun to step a bit outside them, at times, but when all sense of decorum is lost and all boundaries are pushed and accepted, society falls into a kind of random insanity and chaos … where nothing has any real value or meaning…

Good becomes bad, bad becomes good, lie becomes truth and truth is deemed lie then confusion, chaos, immorality, lack of decorum in what’s appropriate as in dress and everything else, manners, personal dignity are lost and a society becomes savage-like…

When those with morals become the ‘outcasts’ and those of immorality become the standard … we have fallen into hell… a kind of Sodom and Gomorrah…

A moral minority exists now… that’s what I am feeling in the world. Little to nothing worthwhile to watch on TV.. so much focused on crime, sex, exploitation and sin in general…a continual pushing of the envelope until there is nothing left… but the abyss of hell…

Our leaders blatantly lie, con and spin for agenda as the media holds little accountable and contribute to the downfall of society.

Not much value is given to morality or healthy emotional standards. Our society has become lost and devoid of standards, values and goodness on almost all levels…

The over emphasis on sex and lack of control in many has become rampant. The sanctity of a human being is being destroyed. Human life means nothing to many and the lack of physical and emotional health are becoming the norm instead of the oddity.

It once was rare to see a fat person and fat at that time, was actually just a bit pudgy and these people were ashamed and shamed. Perhaps, shame should be brought back …

Only a few got pregnant out of wedlock or ‘before’ they got married and they were ashamed and shamed… People are having children today who have no idea how to even care for themselves.

Shame those who have children out of wedlock, shame those who have affairs and cheat. Shame those who are obese because of gluttony. Shame those who dress inappropriately. Shame those who don’t groom themselves healthfully and properly.

We are now accepting and tolerating things that we have not previously, in order, that no one feels bad about themselves. Perhaps, people need to feel bad and be ashamed and shamed, in order, that society rise to higher acceptable behaviors and appropriateness, instead of to lower.

The cries being now, “Don’t judge me. Don’t be a bully. Don’t be a ‘hater’…” PC rules the world and it is destructive to everything of value that of good. These mantras are destroying society… allowing for the idiocy and slovenliness of immorality, crassness, abuses to self and others, rudeness, etc. to flourish…

Many have lost self-pride, self-awareness and the ability to discern. This is what happens when a society has no standards, boundaries, or set standards and morality to live by.  All that’s left is tolerance… to tolerate that which is intolerable…

Society has been lowered to the ‘acceptance’ of any and everything… same-sex marriage, pedophilia, sexual deviates, perversion, inappropriateness of dress, cheating, lying, no manners, no standards, no guidelines, no family standards, twisted thinking, actually, more abusive behaviors to self and others are being accepted than ever before.

I say shame and humiliation needs to be brought back…

‘Political correctness’ and tolerance are lowering our standards to non-existent.

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Relationships, Self-help, Women In Real Life

Cheaters…

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???????????????????????????????If you date, marry  or stay with a cheater be prepared to be cheated on because, if they cheated once, they will again.

Cheating is the behavior of those with a serious character flaw. A cheater has no respect for commitment either to a person, or for commitment that a person makes to another. And ultimately they have no respect for themselves. If a woman spreads her legs for someone who is married to another, she doesn’t respect herself, the man, or the woman he is married to and she certainly has no respect for marriage or commitment.

If a man sticks it in another when he is committed or married to someone else he has no respect for women, men, commitment or himself.

People who cheat in relationships are just as despicable in other places in their lives. They are at their core liars. They cheat and cheating is a lie and most continue to cheat one after another. Foremost, it is a lie to their self for their justifications and reasons for cheating…. then their self-lie vomits damage onto all the others they draw into their equation of deceit and betrayal.

When I discover a man or a woman has, or is cheating on their committed partner, I lose all respect for them and get them out of my life. Some people place no value on honesty, integrity, commitment or fidelity and this is destroying love, commitment, the sanctity of marriage and the integrity of family and it’s destruction to the children brought into these unions. It is a blight on respectable society.

Children reared in a cheating relationship are taught by example that respectively men, women and ‘commitment’ to love have no value. Therefore, they grow up fragmented in this regard … and either recreate this kind of behavior in their lives, or try very hard to not be involved in this type of experience. But the imprint on them from the example in their childhood may create blinders where they may very well choose exactly what they don’t want.

My first husband was a cheater, an alcoholic, a gambler and a fraud to everyone he interacted with. I vowed to never marry a cheater or an alcoholic, but I blindly married exactly what I never wanted. I was reared by functional alcoholics and a father who cheated on my mother. He thought I didn’t know but I always did. I heard him talking on the phone to a woman when I was a teenager and my friends saw him out with women at local clubs and told me about it. When I got older, I took it upon myself to meet one of his women even as I tried to block this knowing as it repulsed me to my core and I vowed I would never have this in my life, but I did.

Later in his life, my father confessed his cheating to me and told me that he wanted to leave my mother several times and wished now that he had. It was strange to hear this from him as previously when I confronted him, he denied what he was doing. Denying is the main tool of a cheater. They deny and deny. Keeping up their image is important to their identity… trying to think and give the ‘image’ that they are a ‘good’ person, when they aren’t. Because what they are is a cheater and a liar. It would have been better in some regards, had my father been honest and left my mother, instead of living a lie that I had to endure.

When someone is cheated on, it is about the cheater. It is their immoral, corrupted character and the only thing to do is to get away from people like this because these people very rarely change. They are corrupted in their souls. They have a lack of respect for others in their souls. They steal, lie, and cheat. They are looking for something outside themselves to make themselves feel better and it doesn’t work so they just keep it up… just like an alcoholic, or any person who is addicted.

This behavior also spreads venereal disease…and oftentimes to the innocent victims of this sin. Cheating is a vile and corrupt character flaw and there is no excuse for it.

Bill Clinton and his debacle with Monica … put cheating on the forefront … when he stated that oral ex wasn’t sex. HA! And to ‘some’ he made ‘cheating acceptable’. What a rank man this slime is and for Hillary to stay with him after such blatant cheating, is a horrible example for women and society … and we all know what liars, cheaters, corruption even murder these two have inflicted upon society. As I have written before, I met the woman that Clinton had a long affair with while married to Hillary. This woman is a singer and she was preforming at a party I attended.  I spoke with her before realizing who she was. She had cold empty eyes and appeared needy and cheap in my estimation. Then a friend informed me of her notoriety… She has written a book about her affair with Clinton….. how tacky can one get?

Cheaters are at their core cold, unfeeling people because to cheat on someone or to cheat with someone when they are in a committed relationship is a self-serving act and to do this a person is cold and places no value on what they are doing to others.

Years ago, I was asked out by a famous actor who at the time was separated, but still married, and known for his womanizing.  I turned him down flat. Much later, he is in the news for having throat cancer and he attributed this to his having had oral sex with infected individuals.

Wake up world! The spreading of venereal diseases is a symptom of a corrupted society.

Cheating isn’t exciting or glamorous… it’s skanky! And those who participate in it are of low moral character and nothing about them is sexy, attractive, loving, sensual or desirable .. they are a disease and blight on society.

http://youtu.be/uTRP-pqr3hs

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Inspirational/Spiritual, Self-help, Women In Real Life

If you value something, it’s because you make it so…

???????????????????????????????What you value and prize is your decision and choice. Haven’t you observed someone value something like an art object and you place no value on it? Or someone likes someone or something so much and you place no value on them or it…

What you value and think of as special is individual. Value comes from how you were reared, the importance placed by those around you, those in your world, the society at large and what comes to be meaningful to you and it comes down to individual choice. It’s guided by your individual value system.

Couples or friends won’t stay connected if they don’t have pretty much similar values on the important issues in life. Our values and what we ‘prize’ define who we are and each seeks their own level.

I value honesty, morality, cleanliness, love, romance, body-mind-spirit connection, health, purity, monogamy, punctuality, manners, commitment, simple style, art, beauty, quiet, good teeth, good food, preciseness, creativity, intellect, sense of fun, fine things, education, continual learning, the ability to enjoy and appreciate, a sense of order, quality, physical fitness, the American way, the constitution, freedom, human life, Christ and my connection to God…. not necessarily in that order….

So someone who doesn’t share or meet with most of my values or agree and honors them, I would not want to be around, nor them me… as we would clash and conflict…

When we care about someone, we respect what they value.

What we value defines who we are. What a society values defines how it lives.

Have you thought about what you value and how it defines you and your world?

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Inspirational/Spiritual, Self-help

Fake it till you make it and it will all be cool…

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‘???????????????????????????????Fake it till you make it’. This is the mantra with some in the ‘sales’ arena and those spewing their ‘new age spiritual’ advice.

What is meant in my estimation and opinion… is to appear confident even when, perhaps, you don’t feel that way, in order, that you may rise to success…

But the negative aspects to this ‘fake it till you make it’ mindset is that some people have taken it to a level of … I don’t need to know what I am doing. I don’t need to be honest. I don’t need to have skills. I will just ‘fake’ it all. I can fake it by lying to myself and others and if I am believed I will be a ‘success’. If I learn to fake it and get really good at faking it, I can be a success by ‘faking it’.

Example: People fake being happy. The adage being, if you ‘act’ happy then you will be happy and attract happy people to you.  But this is certainly not always the case. People need to feel what they are feeling, whatever that feeling is… sad, happy, glad, mad… it’s all apart of being human. And faking feelings can lead to suppression and this can lead to drinking, drug use and other addictions to assist in feeling happy where happy doesn’t exist.beige

Also, there are very evil and corrupt people who prey on happy people. If someone ‘appears’ to have it ‘going on’ predators, sociopaths and those of evil will attract and attempt to prey on it, take from it, or take it down.

Like kind attracts like kind and also opposites attract…

So if you are genuinely happy and have a happy life be prepared to have others who are ‘faking being happy’, try to suck up to you, enter your life for their benefit and try to take from you.

Hiding behind fake feelings is not good for your emotional or physical health. And if you fake things often enough, you may soon lose the ability to know what is real and what is reality. Some even fake being in love to attain sex, money or other benefits. It’s become pretty much a fake world with some and on varying levels. Think the prostitute who fakes attraction and sexy then says what she needs to, in order to be paid.

Ever asked a friend, “How are you?” And they respond ‘fine’… when you can see that they are not fine. Some people keep up the facade, so that others won’t know the ‘truth’ of their life, what they are really feeling, or what they are really dealing with. And faking it takes allot of energy. In fact, it is exhausting to be a fake… and why so many fakers turn to drugs, alcohol, food and sex addictions, etc. to keep themselves propped up. Also, ‘faking it’ and not honoring, accepting and expressing your real feelings and emotions leads to illness…and fat, many fat people stuff their emotions with food. Trying to stuff down real feelings and emotions and it doesn’t work, it just makes them fat and miserable.  And just observe the fat we have walking around these days…

You know the story of the abused housewife who kept up the happy family facade until she turned up dead. Her eyes were always sad and her smile fake… as she said all was well.

And those people who speak in that fake kind, calm voice when trying to project something they are not… to get what they are after…when you can feel their inner tension and agenda. It’s sickening. And if you are in your real self and intuition, being around people like this will actually make you feel ill.

Then the holy rollers… those who are so self-righteous… spewing their dogma… while they cheat on their wives, prey on the young, or their community for donations.

And we now have a ‘president’ who faked it to get to where he is. Obama is completely fake. I intentionally did not capitalize ‘president’ because, until Obama is out of office I have no respect for the office.  Obama is a media creation and a fake. And perhaps, how a person such as this arrived to be where he is, is because the world has become so fake. If someone says it, it’s believed, whether it is true or not. The media, now-a-days is the fakest racket that there is…. they spew lies and propaganda for agenda and many in the masses believe it to be truth. The media propped up and covered up for the Obama dog and pony show… and so now, we have FAKE president!

Many reality ‘stars’ actors, politicians, media persona are ‘ fake media creations’… They fake their persona in order to become a household name. You may admire their fake facade, but if your really knew the truth… not so much.

People like this manipulate the world by being fake while they manipulate and fake out themselves along the way.

Oprah promoted a man, Eckhart Tolle… One of his quotes…
“Internal and external are ultimately one. When you no longer perceive the world as hostile, there is no more fear, and when there is no more fear, you think, speak and act differently. Love and compassion arise, and they affect the world.”

This is new age BS… when at first glance, it ‘appears’ great, wise and the way to be…

But if you aren’t living your real and true feelings and being authentic to yourself, you can’t even get close to this… and faking who you are will create chaos in yourself and your world. Example: if you no longer are able to perceive a situation as hostile when it really is hostile and you enter thinking it is loving… then you can be harmed very badly.

You can be feeling bad internally and bring good things to you and you can be feeling good internally and bring bad things to you…

Just ‘thinking’ something is a certain way, doesn’t make it so…

Our ability to perceive fear is a gift from God and only the stupid would ignore it. Beige bench 2 Denying fear and that evil doesn’t exist is what Satan wants.

So, ultimately and in its entirety, in my opinion, this quote is BS.  Also in this new age BS what is occurring is that people who are trying very hard to ‘feel good’ internally all the time then when they have not so good things happen to them, they think it is their fault, in that, they must not have been thinking ‘good’ enough or being ‘good enough’ internally. And this brings about self-shame, self-remorse and self-guilt.

The deal is to feel and to be honestly who you are. Feel what you are feeling so it can pass through you… so you can be in your clear God-given intuition… instead of some dream state that all is well when it isn’t.

How about saying to yourself. God give me clarity of mind and emotions in order that I see and perceive things as they really are, not as I want them to be, but as they actually are. As when you see clearly you are able to respond appropriately.

I have met new age people who try to ‘act’ nice’, ‘polite’, ‘good’  and ‘happy’ who are anything but…

When you are real within yourself with your feelings and emotions and express them appropriately… you are able to better perceive what is real and what is fake. And this will better serve yourself and the world.

Why have people become so afraid of what they are feeling? Is it because fakes like Oprah and other new age gurus have told us that it’s not okay? When you feel unhappy, feel it… when you feel fear know what you feel. So that you can protect yourself.

I like real people. Those who feel what they feel and express it appropriately. And some people fake being real (like in my opinion Oprah) in order to further fake out the world for their use and benefit.

I think one reason we have a fake for a ‘president’ is because so few can handle real. And people like Oprah have done harm to this world by assisting in creating this facade.

There are people in this world who will smile and be nice until they get close enough to slit your throat.

We are living in a time when truth is lie and lie is truth…

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Self-help

Look at what you made me do!

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???????????????????????????????This is the communication of abusers, those who blame, those who deflect. those who cannot take responsibility for their own actions and those who project their issues of anger, insecurity, mistakes, lack, frustration, etc. onto others.

We are living in a society now who shouts! Look at what you made me do!

Think of the bully who beats a woman.. saying, “Look at what you made me do! You made me hit you.”

Picture the parent that hits their child shouting, “Look at what you made me do!”

Think of the alcoholic shouting as they drink, “Look at what you made me drink!”

Think of the overweight person who blame restaurants and food for their being fat… “Look at what they made me eat!”

Think of the idiocy of blaming a gun instead of the person pulling the trigger… “Look at what the gun made me do!”

Think of the rapist. “Look at what she made me do because of how she was dressed!”

The murderer, “Look at what they made me do! They made me kill them! It was  their fault not mine.”

A person is responsible for how they react, what they do, what they eat, what they drink, and how they treat others.  No one ‘makes’ anyone do anything. They make the choice to do what they do.

Sure occasionally,  we all do things, without realizing what we are doing or the consequences…. that is part of being human and part of the blindness of being on this earth. But as we grow and mature, we learn to look at ourselves and to take responsibility. That is what being a mature, emotionally healthy adult does. Being able to accept that you made a mistake and not to blame others is emotionally and mentally healthy.

When a society as a whole shouts, “Look at what you made me do!”, we are in trouble. We are living in a world of abusers, liars, thieves, deflectors, blamers, circle-talking, those addicted to escaping, and literally children who have never grown up. We are living in a world of people who cannot see or accept the truth.

Obama spent his first term blaming Bush, in fact, he still does. Obama is an immature child who will not take responsibility. He is an abuser, a deflector, a blamer, a liar, a thief, a user, an addict…  as he continually shouts, “Look at what you made me do!” And the world is not only hearing this ludicrous cry from the ‘presidency’, but is tolerating it… WHY?

We have sunk into being a society that takes no responsibility and if we continue on this path, we will be destroyed… as all abusers destroy their lives and everything that they touch.  They will not accept responsibility, see the truth, they lie to themselves and to all others in order to keep their lie alive…that they are not responsible.

We are living in a world of lies and we must wake up!

Jesus died on the cross saying, “Father, forgive them for they know not what they do!” Jesus died so we could wake up! So why now are so many asleep without the character to accept the truth of their actions?

It begins with responsibility. You can’t live an honorable life without it.

It’s not, “Look at what you made me do!” It’s, “Look at what I did!”

Next time, I will do better, I will apologize. I will own who I am … so therefore, I can mature, grow, become, and accept responsibility for who and what I am and for what I do. If individuals do this then the world will become better, stronger, whole, emotionally healthy and the blamers, the side steppers, the deflectors, the liars, the false ones, the people of the lie will be shamed and cast aside as they should be, until they can accept who they are, what they do, and what they have become…

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EXPLOSIONS, Inspirational/Spiritual, Politics

Exploding concerning…Foreign Aid!!!

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???????????????????????????????Someone please tell me what the hell’s wrong with  the people who run our country?! Both Democrats and Republicans say, “We’re broke!”  And can’t help our own Seniors, Veterans, Orphans, Homeless, etc.,?

But, over the last several years ‘THEY’ have provided direct cash aid to:

Hamas – $351 M, Libya $1.45 B, Egypt – $397 M, Mexico – $622 M, Russia – $380 M, Haiti – $1.4 B, Jordan – $463 M, Kenya – $816 M, Sudan – $870 M, Nigeria – $456 M, Uganda – $451 M, Congo – $359 M, Ethiopia – $981 M, Pakistan – $2 B, South Africa – $566 M, Senegal – $698 M, Mozambique – $404 M, Zambia – $331 M, Kazakhstan – $304 M, Iraq – $1.08 B, Tanzania – $554 M, … literally billions of Dollars  and they still hate us!

While on the other hand,  our retired seniors, living on a ‘fixed income,’ receive NO aid!  Nor do they get any breaks, while our government  and religious organizations will pour hundreds of billions Of $$$$$$’s and tons of food to foreign countries!

Someone needs to explain that charity begins AT HOME!!!

And another atrocity –  We have hundreds of adoptable  American Children who are shoved aside to make room for the adoption of foreign orphans.

AMERICA – A country where we have countless homeless without shelter,  Children going to bed hungry,  Elderly going without needed medication  and the mentally ill without treatment — etc.

YET………. ‘They’ will have a ‘Benefit’ Show for the people of Haiti, on 12 TV Stations; Ships and planes lining up with food, water, tents  clothes, bedding, doctors and medical supplies.  Now Just Imagine if  our own *GOVERNMENT* Gave ‘US’ the same support they give to foreign countries.

It’s as if ‘they’ want Americans to suffer and America to Fail….

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Entertainment, EXPLOSIONS, Women In Real Life

Exploding about…Entertainment, Entertainers, Escape…

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Entertainment is for amusement, escape and ‘occasionally’ education. It is fun and healthy to be amused, to laugh, to explore creativity and to enjoy the talents of others…

But entertainment does not stand on its own as something good in itself. It is only a means, a means to a higher end and purpose. Recreation and exercise as a means to better health? Great. Vacations and sports as a means of relaxation? Fine. Movies and the performing arts taken in for pleasure… excellent.

But as soon as entertainment goes beyond that, as soon as it becomes an end in itself, as soon as sports, games and hobbies, etc. consume us, then we abuse God’s gifts and our lives are not lives of balance and moderation, but rather of excess and imbalance. Most of the emphasis in our society these days seems is about having a good time and being entertained.  It used to be that after work was completed then there was a time to relax and to be entertained.

Today, each child receives an award just for participating, not for achievement. It used to be awards were given for actual achieving and it gave a child something to strive for and a sense of pride in the actual accomplishment. But today it seems to be all about the feel good of the award instead of what it takes to do something.
 
Fun and pleasure are great to experience…. it’s a wonderful part of living, but when…
everyone ‘needs’ to have fun most all of the time and to always feel good rather than achieve, stretch to meet goals and accomplishments then forgotten is the truth that God has put man on earth to achieve in order to grow and sometimes that means sacrifice, discipline, doing without and hardship. Now it seems man works as little as possible in order that he play. Life is viewed as a playground rather than a place to achieve. And today the younger generation is all about being entertained and playing and not only the children but many adults.  It’s party – party…escape and party as much as you can into food, video games, TV, the Internet, drugs, sex, alcohol, etc. and this creates a lazy, fat, slothful, slovenly, promiscuous, non-thinking, lack of common sense and decency society.  Just look around. What do you see but mostly fat, slovenly, sloppy, promiscuous examples, both in life and as displayed in the areas of entertainment and the public.   

Sex is not entertainment. It is for expressing affection and love between committed individuals.. sure it is pleasurable and fun, but it is a private expression. Hugh Hefner was one of those who turned sex into an accepted form of entrainment and made it ‘look’ cool to do so… and nothing about him is ‘cool’… it’s lowly and and skanky… but some people model his lifestyle and choices…

Paul writes in II Timothy 3, “Men shall be lovers of their own selves, covetous, boasters,” and so on. And, “They shall be lovers of pleasure rather than lovers of God.” The Christian is a lover of God. The unbeliever is a hater of God and a lover of pleasure. And as that love of pleasure develops into pleasure-madness all around us, this constitutes a peril. These are perilous times for you, me and our children.

A lover of pleasure is a hedonist. Our society has become thoroughly hedonistic. 

Hedonism is the moral philosophy that pleasure and happiness are the chief goal of human life.  Look at the example of the Obama’s with their parties and vacations. The Obama’s hang with ‘rappers’ and entertainers, vacation continually on America’s dime and time. The Obama’s are hedonistic. And put on the political scene by an ‘entertainer’, ‘a living in sin ‘talk-show yakker’, Oprah, who attended, along with Obama, a ‘church’ promoting hate and it’s been said a place that matches up gay men with ‘acceptable wives to create a front of respectability… what is this mess of sin exactly?

Hedonism is the ‘religion’ according to which most people live to today. The rightness or wrongness of some activity is determined by whether it results in pleasure or in pain. If you get pleasure from something, do it; it’s a good thing. If it causes you pain, or discomfort, avoid it. Do you see the peril of being surrounded by people of that philosophy and outlook? Of living in the midst of such a perverse generation? It creates liars, deflectors, blamers and those of no character or morality.

And many today get their news, morality, standards and life views from ‘so-called’ entertainers. Public figures are ‘famous’ for doing nothing as in the Kardashians… and their lives are that of immorality… children without marriage, children with one man while still married to another, sex tapes… excessive flaunting and pleasure with no regard to the the example they are setting.  Why would any thinking moral human being want to model their life after that used for entertainment… as this example is destroying the morality of our youth and therefore our society.

Politics has become ‘entertainment’. Look at the example of Anthony Wierner.. despicable behavior and this lowly perverted man, married to a Muslim who works for Clinton is running for Mayor of NY…

Many people appear to think they are living in some movie or on some reality show of nothingness. It’s all about escape and primarily escaping anything real, any real emotion, or feeling, any real responsibility, accountability, commitment or morality. It’s all about the fun and escape and what you can get away with. And if it doesn’t feel good enough then off to another ‘something’ to make the high – higher… then more is needed for the next high.

Entertainment and entertainers are most times very poor examples of how to live life. And what a person chooses for entertainment speaks volumes about who they are.

It used to be that society knew the difference in what was real life and reality, and what was for only for entertainment, but now it appears more and more that they are one and the same and this is destroying many from having a wholesome, moral and productive life.

There must be a balance in life… work, pleasure, joy and pain, striving and relaxing based in morality and standards.. too much of anything is not a good thing.

Women In Real Life

Hitting the medical wall – dark days and nights…

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One step forward – one step back…recovering from the accident where I fell on an unmarked wet floor in a restaurant has been a Spring and Summer of hell …

For months my left side was not able to function, both my left leg and left arm out of commission…

I made great strides as I focused so intensely on learning to walk again along with learning to use my left arm while trying not to lose my smile in the process.

But first, I needed to not use my left arm and leg at all… as the surgery on my elbow healed, along with not putting any weight on my left leg, so the hairline fractures in my sacrum, tailbone and lower back would heal properly. Then after three weeks of sedentary torture, the cast was removed from my arm and I am told that I must break through the scar tissue, in order, to be able to use my arm ‘normally’ and at full range, while at the same time to strengthen the muscles in my left leg, so that, I will be able to walk without assistance and in my normal gait.

I worked diligently and hard everyday in rehab, and also on my own to gain full range of motion in my elbow and to strengthen my leg.

During this time, I would have nightmares that I would never be able to walk normally again and, of course, this freaked me out and made me work even harder.

I progressed from crutches, to a cane, to walking very slowly as I tried to make light of it all and have as much ‘fun’ as possible in this very trying time, as it hurt terribly to walk and I had overwhelming fear that I would fall again.

Emotional trauma makes an imprint on your brain just as  physical trauma makes an imprint on your body and it is difficult to deal with and takes time to release. And I was dealing with both.

Adrenaline coursed through my body as I worked so very hard to regain what I had lost as I tried to remain positive that I would be able to, and as of now, I have regained most of it…

But, I have hit what’s termed a ‘medical wall’ … after so much stress and intense effort, I am emotionally and physically drained and exhausted. I am tired and when I say tired…  I mean tired!

I still have pain in my elbow and the left side of my tailbone, but I am walking fine and have 97 percent range of motion in my left arm. But I need to keep strengthening my left leg and rebuild more, so the muscles I lost in my left arm will be as they were before the accident.

I can be walking at my normal pace, then I come across a concrete floor and panic internally and feel intense fright as I recall how quickly I fell and how horribly it hurt when my left side slammed into the wet concrete.

I am still hesitant to push up with my left arm, which is what I am needing to do now, while I will state again that I am tired… exhausted on a level that I never recall being before.

This healing and rehab after an accident is a full time job that shakes and takes a person to their core, in order, to not only call on all of their internal and external resources of strength, but that they call on God’s divine assistance and grace…

Everyone remarks about my ability to smile as I go through this ordeal. So I will reveal that I have had some very dark days and nights of the soul… when I ask why!

All my life I have tried to be careful and to take very good care of my physical being. I eat healthfully most of the time, except when I don’t, HA! And I have always worked on and guarded my physical self and fitness. I have worked out all my life in some manner and form.

Then wham! An irresponsible, unconscientious restaurant and I am damaged physically and from no fault of my own as I was  even wearing rubber soled shoes an still fell because the floors were so wet. I went from fit as a fiddle to broken, sedentary , operated on, in bed, in rehab, and now, this medical wall of complete and utter exhaustion…

I ask why?

Was it so that this particular establishment will be more careful in the future? How irresponsibly negligent that they leave a floor wet in a darkened area that is the only path to the restrooms. I was fit and agile and look what the effects of their negligence had on me. Think about how much worse this would’ve been on a more physically fragile person … it was a disaster waiting to happen.

Did this happen, so that I once again learn what I am made of… not only physically, but emotionally and spiritually?

Because now that I have most of the physical aspects conquered, I find I am dealing with a deeper emotional and spiritual wound…

When the doctor told me, you are healing great… I felt a momentary surge of relief  then cratered into some kind of a release of letting go of all that energy in the adrenaline surge that it took to help me heal and I feel into complete exhaustion.

Healing is such a multi-level, deeply internal process coming from the inside out, and ‘we’ humans are so very fragile as well as resilient…and just when you think it is past you, it’s not.

So, my hat goes off to those going through any kind of trauma…as compared to many, mine is not so much… but it was allot to me.

And now, I have collapsed into exhaustion…and praying that I will recover soon…

What is all this pain on earth for… the physical as well as the psychological? Then add to the trauma of the accident, I am still mourning my Dad who died almost one year before the accident occurred….

Thoughts?

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EXPLOSIONS, Politics

Adults in kindergarten brainwashing school…

1 Comment

learn to speak, to think and to comply with the standards of the Obama regime… FB’s agenda and goal. 

Toddlers and children who say ‘naughty’ words are, often times, put in ‘time out’. Conservatives and Christians who say anything Facebook doesn’t approve of are put in a FB timeout… put in FB jail …

It’s Conservatives, not Liberals, Progressives, Democrats, Muslims, Terrorists or anyone else… it’s mostly Conservatives and Christians. Libs apparently can post what they like… as in calling Palin a whore or promoting a ‘Kill Zimmerman’ page, and it’s fine with FB. But let a Conservative list words and wham.. it’s ‘time out’ and you are given ‘punishment’ for the ‘so-called crime’ from the regime.

It appears, FB is a ‘brain washing training ground’ of sorts for Conservatives, Christians, Libertarians or anyone else who disagrees with the Obama agenda, to learn not to say anything that FB, an arm of the Obama regime, does not approve of. It’s Obama’s brainwashing and behavior modification school. Obama met with Zuckerberg, remember?

Is this, perhaps, what is happening at all media outlets and why we aren’t getting real news, but canned propaganda? Are real journalists being threaten with ‘time outs’,  being fired and worse, while the liberal/progressive talking heads spew regime agenda and are on continually?

I listed all the slang names for races, and sexual preferences, I could think of… I wasn’t calling anyone these things. They were just words, one after another. I was just listing them and FB notified me that I was banned for 12 hours because of doing so. Where I posted these words was on the ‘Facebook Blackout page that is set for August 25 to stand for free speech and equality for Conservatives on FB.

Apparently, FB is patrolling and sending trolls to this page to catch anyone for saying anything for which ‘they think’ should be given a time out to try and slow down this project for freedom of speech. Because clearly FB only thinks free speech is for those who say what they want and believe as they want…. just like the Obama regime…

Persecuted for telling the truth.. and persecuted for saying ‘certain words’… that the Liberal/Progressives can say.. 
  
One ‘Facebook Blackout’ page administrator was given a 12 hour ban for telling a Lib that they were on FB only for attention. Seems Libs can say what they want then report to have banned anyone they choose for anything and FB follows suit. 

FB is being run like a Communist country..where people are monitored and reported on.

Comrade, there are certain words that just may not be said by anyone, but the ruling regime. It’s a ‘word game’ and must be played according to the regime…Some words are good and some are bad… The regime can call you names, but you may not call them the same names. They make the rules…. you must follow or be punished…
 
So as I toddler might say… poopoo, peepee, dog poo, ca ca to FB and their gestapo-like monitoring…. 

Why doesn’t FB just come out and say that they are a site for Liberals, Progressives, Muslims and Terrorists?

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Inspirational/Spiritual, Politics, Self-help

Snakes are famous for changing their minds…

Pursuing, romancing, lying, promising, conning, deceiving, focusing on ‘their’ agenda of the ‘sting’, conquering, possessing, manipulating… saying just enough truth to be believed webbed into their con…  

Playboys – sexual pursuits, romance, power-over, self-gratification, lying, narcissistic, sociopathic, false, full of ego, empty rhetoric until they achieve their goal then a 180 degree turn after they do.

Politicians – empty, lying rhetoric, romance, deception, false compassion and interest and pursuit until they achieve their position of power-over and control enough to implement, promote and reveal their self-serving agenda to reveal their narcissistic, full of ego, sociopathic, even psychopathic, only focused on self-gratification…

Playboys and politicians…. like used car salesmen, not to insult used car salesman, which is really a more honorable pursuit than a politician … HA!

But this ‘snake’ aspect rings true in playboys, politicians, many ‘big business’ types, lawyers, salespersons and the likes. The characteristics of the ‘snake’… the ‘serpent of evil intent’ are becoming more prevalent in all areas these days. Once the ‘sale’ is made … their position in government attained, make the girl trust and like them, close the sale after money has changed hands… they do a complete180 degree turn…

Playboys and politicians are always trying to ‘sell’ someone something…  and Weiner, Clinton and the likes, have the worst characteristics of both while also filled with sexual con and perversion which makes sense, in that, the serpent is a symbol of both the power of deception and sexuality…

The serpent is a charming exploiter… a user and deceiver of humanity… 

In the Book of Genesis, the Serpent is portrayed as a deceptive creature or trickster, who promotes as good what God had forbidden, and shows particular ‘cunning’ in its deception. (cf. Gen. 3:4–5 and 3:22)

The serpent appears in the Garden of Eden who tempts Eve to eat the fruit of the Tree of Knowledge of Good and Evil and denies that death will be a result.

The Serpent has the ability to speak and to reason: “Now the serpent was more subtle than any beast of the field which the Lord God had made” (Genesis 3:1).
 
The art of deception… the serpent, the Leviathan spin of fogging communication for agenda and self-satisfaction of taking from another with no honorable intent or exchange of value is taking over in our world…

And when a serpent can’t succeed at their deception, they oftentimes become cruel, hateful, vindictive, etc.. as their true self is revealed…

Snakes don’t like to be revealed for what they really are…

How true does this ring?

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