Category Archives: Women In Real Life

Deflecting…

to avert and change the subject in conversation is rampant in communication today…

Deflect – turn from a straight course, fixed direction, or line of interest. Cause (something) to change direction by interposing something; turn aside from a straight course.

Therefore, many can’t even have a ‘straight on’ conversation today. If anything gets too close to home, or questions, or gets too real, honest and intense, what occurs with many is deflecting, either by changing the subject, humor, sarcasm, or name calling.

Serious questions and things true and on target are being deflected everywhere. Some think that if you side step and side step some more, then ‘maybe’, ‘hopefully’ no one will notice…and they might even forget.

Obama is the king of deflecting as are his administration, his followers, his media and most all of those who voted for him. Liberals and progressives have made deflecting an ‘art form’… deflecting is the art of cons, the weak, the manipulative, agenda-filled, and the guilty… and it is unfortunately, because of public example, considered ‘okay’ to do and has become the ‘norm’.
 
I can’t stand it! It’s almost as if a real conversation or communication with facts and truth are lost in today’s world…

Circle, spin, deflect, repeat then start the wash cycle all over again…

Give me a person that’s straight to the point, answers questions honestly and directly, and uses few words to make their point.Not long ago, this was what was admired and strived for and we must bring this back into vogue, or we become a society of word spinners and deflectors that say nothing that means anything.
 
Agree or not… or will you deflect even this topic and question?

Jealousy, competition, and betrayal amongst women…

Why is this so prevalent? Why isn’t there honor and respect, instead of jealousy, competition and betrayal, among many women?

It doesn’t matter what the age, or the circumstances, many women are jealous, competitive, and betray other women….

Look at what happened to Maria Shriver. A maid working in her home had a lengthy affair and a child with her husband and reports tell us that this woman wanted to be Maria and would try on her clothes and jewelry. Why didn’t, or couldn’t this maid like herself and her life enough to stay out of, and respect the boundaries of someone else’s?

In my life, there were two secretaries that worked for my father’s company that had affairs with my husband at the time. Sure, we know the men who do this are thinking with their ego and penisbut what about the women? One of the secretaries told others that she was going to take my husband because she wanted my life.That, of course, didn’t occur. He got rid of her. I got rid of him.

What kind of a woman does this kind of a thing? They must be full of self- hate, jealousy, envy, betrayal and a ridiculous kind of competition. If more women refused to compromise themselves, their values, and self-worth, men wouldn’t be having as many affairs. There would be fewer women to have them with.

I have sisters. If I share about my life, some  of them will say that all I do is talk about myself. If I don’t talk much about myself, and only inquire about them, some of them will state that I am being nosey, not being friendly, and not sharing about my life. There is no way to win. They will be jealous and create competition where none need be… why is this?

At one time, I had a stepdaughter, 8 years-old. She and I were very close and got along well, but still she would show jealousy of my relationship with her father. It was ridiculous! She would flirt with him in front of me, taunting him to choose whom to give his attention and it was so silly to observe, but also irritable, hurtful and damaging. She would hug his neck and stick her tongue out at me at the same time.  Where does this come from…this competition among women?

One of my best friend’s husbands come onto me and I shut him down fast. Even if I had been attracted to him, I never would have gotten involved because it is against my nature to do this kind of a thing. I have never had an affair. I would consider it betraying not only the woman, but myself.
 
I honor myself and who I am too much to betray my soul.

Is all this jealousy, competition and betrayal because many women have no respect for themselves, so they sure don’t respect others? So, they will steal, lie, betray, and harm other women to ‘make’ themselves feel ‘important’ or ‘valued’ even if it’s only for a short while, when in actuality they are devaluing their self-worth. Does it all boil down to self-worth and if so, why do so many women have so little?

Men don’t have respect for the women who do this. How could they? You can’t respect someone that compromises their self and without any glimmer of honorable values. The men are just using them for their ego and penis needs. Sure, the men ‘may’ have ‘some’ affection for them, but usually the men turn against, or away from these women as soon as they are found out. Do you think if Maria divorces Arnold that he will marry his ‘ex-maid, mistress’? Laughable, isn’t it? 

Look at all of Tiger Wood’s mistresses… is he with any of them?

So, let’s discuss… why so much competition, jealousy and betrayal amongst women?

I can relate with Maria Shriver….

 I don’t agree with her politics, but as a woman, I understand the pain that she is going through.

My first husband, whom I met in college, appeared a ‘nice’ and, at that time, a fairly attractive man… (kind of a young Newt Gingrich, big cheesy grin and big head) cheated on me with his plump, ordinary appearing secretary, while he was working for my father’s company.  Everyone knew, but me. I was teaching ballet and doing the ‘wifey’ thing. ‘I’ was a member of a country club and my husband used the membership to play golf. I watched our budget, while he gambled away money on football games…and ‘played’ at being a big shot.

I thought about divorce. I was not happy, but I kept trying to be the ‘good wife.’ I had many opportunities to cheat, but never did, or would. Cheating on someone you love, to me, is the lowest of low. I always wanted to be married and to have a family, but after observing my husband’s drinking, gambling and general behavior, I knew that I didn’t want to have children with him.

It reached critical mass one Saturday. I was sick and he was playing golf at the country club. He came home and I asked him to get me some 7Up and chicken soup from a restaurant that I liked.

While he was gone, the phone rang and a woman asked me, if I recalled who she is, and I didn’t, until she reminded me that she used to be my husband’s secretary.

“Your husband has a son and I am the mother.”

I laughed as I responded, “What?!”, thinking this plain Jane, plump girl … my husband wouldn’t have anything to do with you…

“It’s true.”, she said, “Ask him when he gets home.”

Of course, he denied it.

He told me that she was trying to extort money from him because of my family. He blamed everyone, but himself. But he never blamed me. He told his parents, “If Ann doesn’t get into heaven no one will.”

I tried to believe what he told me. I was in shock for months.

He paid off the secretary to drop her child support charges, and he signed away all rights to the child, to try and get me, to believe that it wasn’t his child, but it was.

Maria ShriverDuring this ordeal, I lost tons of weight.. so stop saying that Maria looks like a scarecrow.. she can barely eat. She is grieving her dream because it has been shattered.

And this secretary was just the tip of the iceberg… as it played out, my husband had affairs, even while we were engaged, with everyone, and I mean everyone. And I never knew it, or even thought this could happen, even as bad as I was realizing he was, I never could’ve imagined how bad!

So, why did he cheat on me while professing to love me? The day I kicked him out of the house with his golf clubs, he was still professing his love for me, as he shouted it out from the front walkway, “I always loved you!”

Was it because I was ugly, not good in bed, my body wasn’t good enough, not a good wife, not a good enough housekeeper? What was it that was so bad about me that this poor guy had to stick his needy penis into everything with a skirt? 

While. the best thing, I can say about his love making is that he was inept and clumsy….And this is one of the reasons that it was difficult for me to believe that he had affairs. He had grown to have a fat belly and was not attractive physically.. while I was a physically fit ballet dancer…

So, why did he cheat, and if he wanted out, why didn’t he ask for a divorce?

The reasons, it was his nature. He is a gambler, a cheater and probably a sociopath. He was using me for his ambitions.  While my intentions in the marriage were honorable, his weren’t. My intellect was more than his, my morals and everything else. He was from the ‘wrong side of the tracks’, as they say, and he should’ve stayed there.
He liked being with women that he ‘felt’ better than.

I should’ve never married this man and I had second thoughts even the night of the rehearsal dinner. I should’ve listened to my instincts and cancelled it all.
 
I diminished myself in order to make him feel good about himself because that is what a ‘good wife’ does, right?

I found out that he told someone before he married me that he was going to marry a girl from a wealthy family. I made him look good. I helped bolster up his low self-esteem, while all he did was tear mine down…

He forced the divorce to court out of his greed and arrogance, but I was awarded the divorce on exteme mental cruelty in a no-fault divorce state. I was awarded all that was left of our property which meant I was left pretty much broke.

Men like my ex-husband are without a moral compass. They only care about their ego needs and satisfaction in the moment.

Also, a week after I kicked him out. I went to the mailbox and there was a card addressed to him. It was from a ‘flight attendant’ he was having an affair with… so even as he was telling me that he wanted to stay married and was telling me how much he loved me, he was having yet another affair…

So, was all this my fault? Is what happend in Maria’s situation her fault? She is attractive, accomplished, talented and from a prominent family.

No! It’s not our fault! It’s the cheater’s actions, lies and corrupt morals that create these situations.

These ego-driven, self-serving child-men are plain losers.  No matter what their accomplishments, if they destroy and hurt their loved ones because of their ego needs, they are plain selfish. There is no excuse. They are liars, sinners and their wives have no fault to bear.

And yes, I understand that there are women who cheat, but I am not one of them.

Cheaters disgust me…What say you?

He blew out my candle…

A man took me to dinner on my birthday. After, we enjoyed our entrees, a birthday cake was placed before me. He told me to blow out my candle and when I didn’t do it immediately…he blew and we ended up ‘kind of’ blowing together, and he blew out my candle.

Stunned, I sadly exclaimed. “You blew out my birthday candle!”

His reply. “I’ll pass my wish over to you.”

I thought. ‘Thanks alot buddy but I’d rather have my own wish.’

I have never in all my years had anyone ever blow out my birthday candle. I would’ve thought that he would have had the waiter relight the candle, so that I could blow it out on my own. But no! Then another thought, why did he even blow on the candle? It’s my birthday after all… Plus, he didn’t give me the time to make my own wish…

I blew if off and enjoyed my cake…but…

What are your thoughts… have you ever had anyone blow out your birthday candle? That is past the age of say two years old…

I have never blown out a friend’s, beau’s, or family member’s birthday candle ever! It’s a given that this is for the birthday person to do…

It seems like a little thing, but sometimes small actions have big implications…and are indications of other things.

If someone blew out your candle, how would that make you feel? And, or what would you say, or do? And what do you think are the implications of his action?

And look to the left and click to follow…

Sidebar… he was 20 minutes late picking me up… he did call to push the time back but he was still 20 minutes later. As I was walking down my stairs, I saw his car in the front of my house and he was sitting in it on the phone. I sat in the living room and waited and waited…
I peeked out the front door and saw him yakking… I waited…then in the excitement of my birthday, I walked outside and waved to him. He smiled and waved but kept on yakking…
I went back inside and waited… thinking, if it weren’t my birthday, I would cancel the evening…
Then he entered and said. “I apologize. I hate being late, but I will tell you about it.”

When he told me … it was nothing that couldn’t have waited….so this is a bit more insight to the kind of person I was dealing with…

Okay go…what’s your take?

Words, phrases, and names that I am sick and tired of hearing…

Racist – bigot – amazing – at the end of the day – Obama – Oprah – Obamacare – Michelle Obama – Barack – Lady GaGa – Jesse Jackson – Al Sharpton – Barry Soetoro -The View – diet –  MuslimPelosi – sugar is bad – salt is bad  – affirmative action – to each for their own needs – socialism – tax the wealthy – kill the rich -global warming – green house gases – the black race is under priviledged – Al Gore – push 1 for English, push 2 for Mexican – booty – booty call – Vajayjay (wasn’t it Oprah that started this stupid BS word for part of a woman’s anatomy?) – will you take this survey? – hater- Sharia Law – burka – redistribution – entitlement – new age – progressive – liberal – politically correct…

Are some of these on your list? If so, which ones? Then add yours to the list…
And look to the left and click to follow…

Obese by Easter…


Easter2I love Easter Candy!
I just love it! Jelly beans, Brach’s jelly beans, gourmet jelly beans, any and all jelly beans… and chocolate eggs! Brach’s malted-chocolate-covered eggs are one of my fav!Easter3

Then there’s Cadbury royal dark chocolate eggs coated with a crisp sugar shell. I so love dark chocolate!

Easter10

Pangburn’s of Texas makes a millionaire $ bunny…pecans and honey caramel covered in milk chocolate.

I try to limit what I buy and therefore, my consumption because each time around Easter candy time, I gain about five pounds!

Easter9Some years, I am better than others at limiting… but this year.. I gotta admit! I am not doing so well with my limitations of Easter Candy…either buying or consuming…

I munch some after lunch, mid-afternoon and at night…

As soon as Easter candy time is over, my Easter candy five
Easter7 pounds drops in days and like Easter bunny magic, I am back to normal…  which goes to show how easily empty sugar calories add weight…but until then…

I am munching.. munching… Easter time munching…Can anyone relate?

Happy Easter…bunnies!!!

Gas! Blow me away….

It began usual enough. On a windy day in Texas, I filled up my car with gas and was blown away in more ways than one.

It cost close to 50 bucks!

Gas has gone up 24 days in a row and is a dollar a gallon more than this time last year…

Okay! How high do you think it is going to go?

Have gas prices affected how much you drive and if so how?

Have you cut back on other things because of the gas prices?

What do you think is the real reason for the price rise?

Do you think that we should drill in America?

My opinion is that it’s orchestrated price fixing…
that they are playing games with us! If gas is up, it will make most everything cost more…

What’s your opinion?

OLD HAG!

A few days ago, I walked out by front door to see a ‘neighbor’, (using that term lightly, since I have seen this man leave his dog’s mess in people’s yards…not so ‘neighborly, huh?’)  allowing his dog to do his mess on my front lawn. To which I stated. “Please, make sure to clean that up.” The response from this  ‘neighbor’ who appeared much older than me and had a belly that suggested he was carrying twins was, “I will, you old hag!”

I chuckled to myself as I replied. “Clean it up or I will contact the HOA!” Then, of course, I went into my house and out of a window watched to see that he did clean it up… which he did. I bet only because he could see that I was standing at the window.

Calling someone ‘old’ seems to be the ultimate insult these days. ‘old’, ‘racist’ and ‘hater’ just rolls off some people’s tongues ( mostly liberals). Being called a ‘racist’ is such political con … and you all know my opinion on that one, but that is another blog.

What is going on with the ease with which these kind of words are used? Instead of not using the N word… LOL! Here we go with the the ‘old’ word… Is it ‘politically correct’ to call someone old?

I wasn’t insulted, as I thought the man a rude fool. I am too polite to respond with what I was thinking, which was, “When is your baby due?” I have this thing about men with pregnant bellies. Can’t stand looking at them. But I would never shout it out as an insult. Why do that?  What would it accomplish? 

The woman that I started this site with, used to call me ‘old’, whenever she felt threatened, or insecure which was often. She had few manners, was always late, is immature, almost childlike, is full of sarcasm and talks behind people’s backs. (I will send this link to her. I don’t say anything that I wouldn’t say to someone’s face, maybe, that comes with old age and the development of character. Ha!) She used the words ‘racist’ and ‘hater’ often and gossips in a very negative way. She called many of her ‘friends’, a ‘hot mess’, while ummm… well, I wonder, should she have, perhaps, looked at herself? She is a liberal…. ummm.. I wonder? Is all of this fitting together in some way? Liberals… calling names…calling people ‘old’, as if so full of fear of their own aging. The ‘projection principle’ loud and clear…

UMMM… okay back to topic…

Why is ‘Agism or Ageism’ so prevalant today?

Ageism refers to stereotyping and generalising on the basis of age, typically old age, and is spreading to middle age as the boundaries of middle age move into what was once considered old age.

Aging is a natural part of living. We begin aging from the moment that we are born. I like my age and the wisdom and experiences that have carried me to where I am. I don’t feel old. I take care of myself and usually feel great. I workout for 80 minutes on my elliptical. And look better than many 20 and 30 year olds do in a bikini. And I hope to continue to age because otherwise I die!
 
Because of the life I have had, and experiences, I can talk with most everyone … except, maybe, with those name calling liberals. LOL!  Those that call everyone ‘haters’ as a come back to any conversation that holds thoughts different from their own. As in the ‘neighbor’ trying to deflect an insult to me as I caught him getting ready to leave his dog mess in my yard.

Sorry! I can’t seem to stay on topic… Maybe, it’s my age? Maybe, I have become tangential in my ‘twilight, old hag years.’

Older people offer a world of wisdom from which to glean and many have a refinement and an intelligence well-earned from their years on the planet and I find this captivating. Why isn’t this honored instead of diminished? I enjoy talking with the elderly. They are much more interesting than the youth.

Why are we so obessed and fearful of aging? Why is to call someone ‘old’ considered  and used to insult?

There is nothing more stupid and irrtitating than a teenager, or young person’s arrogance who ‘thinks’ that they know it all when they haven’t a clue. Perhaps, the real insult is to call someone…. ‘Hey, young, inexperienced one.’

These days, if you take care of yourself and partake of medical science, you can live long, feel good, and look youthful for many years while enjoying the wisdom and insights of a long life. And recall when you were a child, all you wanted to do, is to be ‘older’ so that you can do this or that. Then when you are older, society deems you too old for this and that.

There is nothing more stupid or insecure then a person lashing out to call someone ‘old’, ‘racist’, or ‘hater’…. especially when it doesn’t even apply and is more a reflection of the person doing the name calling.

Is all this name calling reflective of an immature, unintelligent, insecure, and scared to death, and of death society?

Why are some so fearful of aging, fearful of others’ beliefs and so immature these days?  Too many liberals in the world? Or too many trying to hold onto the ‘stupidity’ of their youth… the ‘flower child’ mentality of immaturity, drugs, liquor and rampant, meaningless sexuality… 

Off the topic a bit, but in my opinion, to call someone a ‘liberal’, or even worse that they ‘think’ like a ‘liberal’, is the height of an insult.

Perhaps, we should replace the words, ‘racist’, ‘old’ and ‘hater’, with LIBERAL!  Wrap it all together in one ugly full of ignorance word… liberal.

I bet that overweight,old looking, big-bellied, rude man that leaves dog mess in his neighbor’s yards is a flaming liberal! Umm.. perfect definition of a liberal…  out of shape, bloated, rude, name calling, deflector, leaving messes for others to clean up.

So bite me, if you call me an old hag!

I like being my age…old hag that I am… photo taken about 8 months ago…

And now this ‘old hag’ is going to workout!

Thoughts?…

What’s your favorite comfort food?

You know when you need something to just make you feel all cozy inside?

One of my fav combos is Campbells’ tomato soup topped with grated cheddar cheese and broken up potato chips.  

Eating this combo makes me feel all cozy and filled-up with the essence of me, as a child, in my parent’s home, where everything is safe and taken care of and will always be okay.


Sometimes, we all need to feel comforted…

They may be plain, simple, or ordinary, but what foods comfort your spirit and cozy you up inside?

What happens when two people can be intimate, but don’t have honest communication…

 

HER THOUGHTS… 
 
Tonight I thought he was acting weird.
 
We had made plans to meet at a bar to have a drink. I was 
shopping with my friends all day long, so I thought he was upset at the fact that 
I was a bit late, but he made no comment. Conversation wasn’t flowing so I suggested that we go somewhere quiet so we could talk. He agreed 
but he kept quiet and absent. I asked him what was wrong; he said nothing. I asked him  if it was  my fault that he was upset. He said it had nothing to do with me and not to worry.
 
On the way home I told him that I loved him, he simply smiled  and kept driving. I can’t explain his behavior. I don’t know why he  didn’t say I love  you too. When we got home I felt as if I had lost him, as if he wanted nothing to do with me anymore. He just sat there and watched 
T.V. He seemed distant and absent.
 
Finally, I decided to go to bed. About 10 minutes later he came  to bed, and to my surprise he responded to my caress and we made love, but I still felt that he was distracted and his thoughts were somewhere else.
 
He fell asleep – I cried. I don’t know what to do. I’m almost  sure that his thoughts are with someone else. My life is a disaster.
 
  
HIS THOUGHTS… 

I shot the worst round of golf in my life today, but at least I got laid.