When a selfish lover says, “I love you”, what they are saying is, I love the way that you make me feel. Or worse, they are saying, “I love you” to try and ‘get’ something from you. Selfish love recognizes ‘certain’ needs must be met in order to maintain its happiness. Real love is free of these restraints and demands.
Love is never ‘perfect’. Demands bring obstacles to love. Unnecessary expectations about love make it rigid and inflexible. We all change from birth to death, and if we are not willing to accept these changes and grow with them as both an individual and as partnerships, then we are neither ready or worthy of love’s full attention.