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Do you believe what they are ‘selling’ …

or yourself?
Snake oil salesman, influencers – so-called entertainment ‘stars’ – media – advertisers – advertising – advertising – advertising – repeat – repeat – repeat – make them like you – make them ‘think’ you know more than they do – that you have some kind of cure – some kind of secret miracle – that you know more than what their instincts tell them – make them ‘think’  that ‘it’, some product, diet, cream, serum, medicine – be it medical or homeopathic – some shampoo or something else – and then get paid for promoting and marketing it.

Get ‘them’ – the ‘masses’ to ‘like’ and trust you – so they will follow you, buy and do as you direct. You will lead them where you want them to go and have them buying what you tell them to – you will have them eating out of your hands – you will be an influencer and get paid for being so.

Teenagers are usually the quickest to follow their pack or peers – they are searching to rebel against any authority over them and to break away, try new things and this, of course can be positive and worthwhile, but it can also lead them on a journey to into hell. They ‘think’ they are  being rebelliously unique as they are being manipulated to become as a brainwashed flock and to gravitate to the same things.

Some things are tried and true – others not so much. They are only a whim or the latest fad – but influencers model, that if it works for them, or even some, it will work for others.  The slogan, “If I can do it, you can do it, too.” – is their call to arms. The  so-called’ influencers are ‘used’ to promote products, lifestyle choices, perfumes, clothing lines, diets – what to eat – how to live – what to buy – what not to eat and more.  Just take the product of Coke and the ‘so-deemed’ energy drinks – these things literally destroy your body, but people buy them en masse only because of false and repetitive promotion, to be/feel cool and ‘to be like all the rest’.  the call to be like all the rest – to be like others – to think if you are different or don’t have, or do what others have – is a powerful motivator for those who can’t think or choose for themselves.

As a young ballet dancer, even at the age of 12 – as that is when I auditioned and was selected as the youngest at that time to be chosen to dance in the corps d’ ballet of a professional company.  I  became obsessed with my weight – along with my energy level. I was going through puberty, so my body was changing and my fluid retention would shift as my hormones fluctuated – a normal and healthy part of maturation.

I write about this time, in my book DADDY THROWS ME IN THE AIR –  in the memory – “You’re too fat – No, You’re too Skinny!”  It was my quest to have the perfect body, even at the age of 12 years-old when I was still growing and changing.

I read everything I could find on nutrition – vitamins, etc. I didn’t realize it then, but I was using my body as a laboratory. I would eat only protein and get very lean, but had little energy. A times, I would starve myself. I would eat Fritos dipped in peanut butter – then eat only grilled cheese sandwiches. I observed how my body reacted as I tried different combinations. As a professionally trained dancer,  I was fortunate to be be given the gift and choice of complete body awareness.  A ballet dancer’s core is from where her strength and movement derive. So, I became ahead of the fitness game, even as a child – and way before most of the world was into it.  I knew the feeling of being completely physically integrated and knew how great it felt. I was into fitness, nutrition, health, etc. before most the rest of the world  had even thought about it. When I was growing up, I never saw a fat person – perhaps, a pudgy child, but compared to what I see today, they would be considered thin.  Food stuffs were filled with less chemicals, hormones, etc. Everything was more natural – even so-called ‘junk food’ tasted like real food as compared to now – as now, it tastes plastic, chemical & fake – not like food at all.

My mother prepared most of our meals  – which were most always a balance of meat, vegetables and a starch. We rarely, if ever had desserts or bread, as in dinner rolls, etc. We only had desserts as in a homemade pie or cake on birthdays or holidays. Sure, we had homemade cookies on occasion and popcorn and very occasionally potato chips. When as a family, we went out to dinner, it was to very nice restaurants – individually owned and, oftentimes we knew the owners – the food was fresh.

People weren’t sick. No one that I knew was was sick – except for an occasional cold, but hardly even that. I knew no sick children and none who took medications for learning, behavior disorders or anything else. We were are pretty much well-behaved.  No one that I knew took anything more than an occasional aspirin – if that.

As fast food came upon the horizon – as in pizza, etc. We tried it and liked it. Only the pizza then was freshly made with fresh ingredients.

Soon other fast-food choices made their entry onto the eating horizon – fried chicken, hamburgers, tacos. I would indulge in this fare – say once a week or less – just kinda going along with my group of friends. I was always into vitamins and took them when others thought they were nonsense. And after all my research, I knew this fast-food-thing with their little buildings popping up with their drive through windows all over the place – could not be good for the human body.

Now, what I see appalls me.  I see overly fat people everywhere. People who have little to no body awareness and certainly don’t feel or operate from their core. And we are not supposed to even notice they are fat, but to accept them as such, so as to not hurt their feelings.

Everything has become an orchestrated distortion. Less fitness over-all, while it’s being pushed and marketed. Less nutrition, while we have more so-deemed nutritional products and services. Many diets saying even taunting us to eat this and not that –  pay us money and you will lose weight – all these specialized foods that taste like yuck! Less activity, while it’s being lauded – more fat  and unfit people, but we are not supposed to shame or even notice them.

And then the sexual confusion being promoted to confuse our youth is off the charts perversion.  Sexualization of our children is of evil and perverse.  With some promoting little boys become girls and little girls become boys – naming them opposite sex names and dressing them as such.  So that, they begin their lives in sexual confusion. It’s vile and repugnant.  Only by these so-deemed influencers, we as a society are being led to accept that which we once found abhorrent as the norm. It’s promoted as leading edge — ‘design your child’s sex’.

So the questions are –  ‘Do you follow others or yourself? Do you follow your God-given instincts and what is moral and psychologically sound, or do you believe and make choices because, or based on something some entertainer does, says, or tells you to do, or to think, buy or live as, and that includes some self-serving ‘religious-type’, making millions off spewing their interpretation of the Bible?

Your connection to God – to yourself – to your body – to your psychological well-being – your moral and emotional health is personal between you and God – it’s not between you and anyone else and it costs nothing, but your time in reading, prayer, awareness and self-reflection.

Eating a pear cost less than eating a Big Mac with fries and is abundantly better for you. Natural and pure is better – less is more. Sex is between those committed in love.


Freedom and choice is of God/good.  Control, no choice, being in bondage to ‘addictions, chemicals, government/entertainers, media, sexual perversions’ are evil/Satanic.
We are in the world, not of it – therefore, be discerning, instead of in bondage to any person, thing or earthly/material belief.

0-7 are the most impressionable & formative years for a human being – so what a child sees, hears and feels at this time are very important to its well-being or not – creating their view of self and of the world. We must shield/protect our children from overt sexuality, violence, & pathology, along with rank so-called entertainment as well as we are able to.
Just as you can inherit your appearance and health, be it good or bad from your ancestors and lineage, you can be imprinted by their beliefs, either negative or positive that will guide your choices and ultimately your life. You will be imprinted and influenced by your parents, caretakers. societal imprints and beliefs and the world that you grow up in, until you become aware. You can change and better your appearance, learn skills, educate yourself, change your health factors by self-care, and you can also change your limiting imprints and negative beliefs entangled in your memories by becoming aware. A tool to assist DADDY THROWS ME IN THE AIR – memoir/self-help available on Amazon, Barnes & Noble, Goodreads, etc. and by contacting me.

Become aware and heal yourself…

There are many on the internet offering love spells, chakra-healings etc. They offer free readings or cheap readings like for $15 then what they do after setting you up is tell you that you have a curse – you need a chakra balancing – love spell, or work on a past life to change your current one – or your life will not go as you wish, etc. They instill fear in you and that ‘they’ can change all this for money – usually lots of money  for the  hours of ‘work’ they will do, or for the candles, crystals  and other ‘supplies’ they will buy and need to do this ‘work’, etc.  Ask yourself – REALLY?

There are people who are really psychic and intuitive who have the ability to read energy. I am highly intuitive and have had many magical things occur in my lifetime and have had premonitions that occurred etc. And this is all for free. 

When someone claims they can change the energy – your life – or cast a spell that someone will love you – or go back in time and change a past life  to change in that lifetime in order to change the energy in this life – RUN! It’s a con. It’s of evil. It’s alchemy. And it’s for ‘their benefit’ of your giving them large sums of money. Don’t give your power or your money away to these cons.

A real psychic charges  a fair price, but not overly so and definitely not lots. And they will not instill fear or try to instill that if you don’t do this or that – that your life will be cursed or that negative things will occur, etc.

Only you have the power to heal yourself. You can change your energy by your awareness, thoughts, and self-healing – chakra and otherwise. No one can really do this for you. You can do it yourself for free. Jesus healed for free. He didn’t ask that anyone pay him money. He asked only that they believe in him and God the father. In prayer all things are possible and prayer is free.
Only Satanic evil charges for prayer, to cast spells or to do alchemy.  Satan wants you to think that he is in control of your life. Just like  these so-called gypsy fortune-tellers, spell-makers, but only for money that you pay to them. They never offer their services and ‘magical’ abilities for free or for nothing – now, do they? Their con is for the exchange of your money, or goods for their – what? Do they even know? Many of these people say the same or similar things – they have been trained to do this from childhood – schooled in the art and con of others. The person going to them is in fear, has had loss, or are searching, are weak and easily set up for and by the con. I have researched this and can tell the real from the con.  I have also helped expose and get money back from these cons.

Some will even ask – for example: a new washer and dryer to wash the evil out of someone or some issue.  Some will ask you to lease or to buy them a car, so that your life will move forward at a faster pace. These ‘psychic’ cons are self-serving evil.  Anyone offering to cast a spell  on you, or someone else, to bring you money, success, love or whatever – is a con and operating out of the evil of control!

Prayer is free – self-awareness is free and you can do it for yourself. A group of people bonded in prayer in the name of God is powerful. And asking someone to pray for you or someone else – does not cost anything. Energy can be changed – shifted etc. and it doesn’t cost a thing. It’s freely sent from God Almighty.

A tool to assist in awareness is a book I have out – DADDY THROW ME IN THE AIR – memoir/self-help. My memories will trigger yours, then you can use the process in Part IV for further self-awareness and to process negative emotions and limiting imprints.  Life is magical and there are energies directing us while we are on our journey on earth. Yes, we all trigger one another as we go about our lives, either to heal or to do harm. Become aware and heal yourself.

Do not give large sums of money to some self-serving alchemists who threaten and use fear tactics. Fear is the lowest vibration on earth. and people who use it do so with manipulation and evil intent and for their self-serving benefit. They are fear – mongering takers not givers.

We are all meant to be wherever we are in any given time. We are born into our individual circumstances for our soul’s growth. It’s our astrology – our ancestral lineage, DNA, the time frame and place we are born, etc. And often times, the people who imprint us are who make- up who we are. Until, we become aware – that we can shift and change as we grow. And this all begins with our awareness to do so. It’s up to us and it’s our choice, even as at times, it may not feel like we have choice.  Life is a healing adventure – others assist, but it’s up to you to process, shift, change and become aware. Make sure you are being guided by God –  not evil – so that it may be for your soul’s highest good. 

Excerpt from FEAST OF MEN ‘Story of a Woman’s Heart’

Startling me, the pilot kneels down in the aisle right by my seat then with a large smile and in a Southern drawl asks, “Are you from LA?”  I laugh silently in my twisted humor. Um, he must think I’m the hijacker. The winking pilot continues looking up at me talking all Southern and gentlemanly like. “You look like someone I used to know who lived in LA. I just wanted to see if you were her.” 

I think, what an overused line, but I look down at him then answer, “I live in Dallas – actually, just outside of Dallas and you look a bit familiar also.”

The pilot looks up at me with his eyes locked into mine. “Oh really, well, I’ve got an empty seat beside me.  Since everyone else is watching the movie, would you like to sit with me and we can chat?  I’d love to talk more with you, but can’t stay here kneeling in this aisle.”

I respond, “Okay – why not, since everyone else is watching the movie.” As I think – nice brown eyes, appears a bit overconfident, but a Southern gentleman, besides I’m bored and can’t seem to sleep. So, talking with him might be a distraction to pass the time. I get up and follow him to where he’s sitting.

He has an aisle seat. There’s a woman by the window. So, I slide into the middle seat then look back.  The lady where I was sitting is yelling and motioning, but I can’t hear her.  So, the gallant pilot goes back to retrieve both my water and Diet Dr. Pepper. Apparently, the lady couldn’t get out of her seat with my tray table down.  I didn’t bring anything with me because I thought I’d only visit with the winking pilot for a short while.

FEAST OF MEN – One woman’s magical mysterious, nightmarish, adventurous journey through men on her quest to have a better understanding of the male energy on her search to find genuine and everlasting love. Just as life brings her the masculine offering of a chance for love, along with experiencing another aspect of herself in reflection – her heart is disappointed even broken. She then is  given the opportunity even forced to heal, as she becomes even more aware of the masculine energy and her relation to it, along with a deeper awareness of her imprints and beliefs. As she travels forward on her journey, the pieces come together, break, then come together again offering her the ability to become more aware and whole.
What if Eve was leading Adam to the opportunity to experience all and every dimension of life? The feminine as it relates to masculine and masculine as it relates to feminine. Male and female rubbing souls against one another for the possibility and benefit of what love creates and heals. And this is exactly what God intended – in the full power of ‘his knowing’ – that only a woman would be able to entice a man to do so. God, after all created the serpent along with the opportunity for choice without which there would be no dark defining light challenges on earth.

Available on Amazon, Barnes & Noble, and other usual places.
http://eart/dp/1642376876/ref=sr_1_fkmr0_2?keywords=FEAST+OF+MEN+byt+Ayn+Dillard&qid=1561582975&s=gateway&sr=8-2-fkmr0

The face of the Democrat/socialist/progressive party – the victim…

Image result for Photos of Christine Blasey FordDemocrat party is the party of victims, weak women – weaker men…

The democratic party – the party of man haters, women who hate men, think they are all liars and should die – especially, if they are old and white.
Actually – the lib/dem/progressive women, I do know and that’s very few – really do hate men and, or have children by them – never married them and the men do not take care of their children. Ummmm – I wonder could the women’s choices have created this and their hate of men – or is it actually their hate of self? Even the cool gay men I know are Conservatives, and of course, they love men, and women. Women – not so much – except for make-up. fashion tips, emoting and gossip. So that it’s the Dem Party – a party of man hating women and of course, those who are gay. Is Pocahontas gay? Does she hate men? We know Killery uses them or murders them and prefers women – wasn’t there a big ‘to do’ that she had a ‘thing’ with Okko Ono?

I have been a victim of sexual harassment – I addressed it immediately – took the man to court – he settled with me – I am not a victim. I addressed it – then released it and all the negativity that it carried from me. I am a strong Conservative Christian woman.

To remain a victim is to remain a fool – to remain tormented – wallowing in self-pity – eaten up with pain rather it be lies/fake/ or real – it’s a form of self-torment. It blocks happiness, joy  and the feminine glow from your face and body. The opposite of what ‘feminism’ is ‘supposed’ to stand for and be.

To allow others to victimize you – you are a fool – and not living in your power.  Isn’t that what the ‘feminist’  movement is ‘supposed’ to be about –  feminine power – equality – equal pay for equal work, etc. Instead, what I see is it  being  used as a victim movement.

I AM NOT A FEMINIST! I am an internally strong woman – processing life experiences and events  as they come and go in my life – then choosing what to keep and what to let go off.

In Part Four of my book DADDY THROWS ME IN THE AIR – is a process explaining how to identify your feelings  related to imprints and beliefs and how to process through them – available on Amazon, Barnes and Noble and all the usual places.  Someone please – get this book to Blasey-Ford –

tImage result for Photos of Christine Blasey Fordhe big pathetic victim face of Dem/lib/progressive victims… whiny child voice so obnoxious – it’s like fingernails on a chalkboard.

Democrat – the victim party!They live as victims, create and use victims for, and to implement their agenda of control. They divide to conquer for their agenda. They create victims – want to keep them  as victims  in order to use the hell out of them – blame, blame blame others – side step, lie, deflect, avoid responsibility – say you’re a strong woman while behaving like a weak whiny child…. and all those big bad white men did it.. BOO HOOO HOO!

Makes sense, doesn’t it that Obama was the first VICTIM president.