“We don’t see things as they are, we see them as we are.”

???????????????????????????????Is this quote by Anais Nin accurate or not? It sounds plausible. It sounds interesting. BUT! I have only gotten into harms way when I thought people where being as honest and as true as I was. When I saw things as I am, I was WRONG! When I saw things as I am, I, often times, got screwed over.

It wasn’t until I had lived much life with enough experiences to realize that most people are not truthful, honest, or kind. They may ‘appear’ kind, if they are after something.

After enough pain, I woke up to be able to see clearly… both the good and the bad in people. Then my life became even more honest, in that, I could see behind motives into intent. I saw and realized that most people are not as I am.. I saw what was real, not what I hoped it was, or how I idolized it to be…

I could see through the facades…

So my take on that quote is that in many instances, it is BS! NewAge BS…

Like the saying, ‘You attract what you are.’ More BS! Can it be true at times? Sure! But not always…

Psychological projection or projection bias is a psychological defense mechanism where a person subconsciously denies his or her own attributes, thoughts, and emotions, which are then ascribed to the outside world, usually to other people. Thus, projection involves imagining or projecting the belief that others originate those feelings.

So, if you are good you can see others as also being good and be completely wrong… it is not just about the projection of negative traits…as most seem to think.

Projection reduces anxiety by allowing the expression of the unwanted unconscious impulses or desires without letting the conscious mind recognize them. And this usually relates to your negative traits… huh?

According to Sigmund Freud, ‘projection’ is a psychological defense mechanism whereby one “projects” one’s own undesirable thoughts, motivations, desires, and feelings onto someone else.

‘Emotions or excitations which the ego tries to ward off are “split out” and then felt as being outside the ego…perceived in another person’.  It is a common process. The related defense of ‘projective identification differs from projection in that the impulse projected onto an external object does not appear as something alien and distant from the ego because the connection of the self with that projected impulse continues’.

Example: A person might have thoughts of infidelity with respect to a spouse. Instead of dealing with these undesirable thoughts consciously, the subject unconsciously projects these feelings onto the other person, and begins to think that the other has thoughts of infidelity and that the other may be having an affair.

In this way, the subject may obtain ‘acquittal by his ‘conscience’ – if he projects his own impulses to faithlessness on to the partner to whom he owes faith’.  In this sense, projection is related to denial, arguably the only more primitive defense mechanism than projection, which, like all defense mechanisms, provides a function whereby a person can protect the conscious mind from a feeling that is otherwise repulsive.

Projection can also be established as a means of obtaining or justifying certain actions that would normally be found atrocious or heinous. This often means projecting false accusations, information, etc., onto an individual for the sole purpose of maintaining a ‘self-created illusion’.

While engaged in projection, individuals can be unable to access truthful memories, intentions, and experiences, even about their own nature, as is common in deep trauma.

Freud in my opinion has some validity as do many… but…

As you grow and become to see and recognize others’ perceptions, desires and motivations, both the good and the bad… then you can really see who the person is…

What another says or does may or may not have anything to do with you. And it’s wise to see them as they are, not how you ‘perceive; them to be. That way you are more able to protect yourself from harm…

FYI.. I have read a ton of Freud… And I say … BS!  Good try form maybe, back in the dark ages of psychology/psychiatry. In my opinion, we are much more complex than Freud saw or had the ability to figure out. Just how messed up were Freud and Jung? Were they ‘projecting’ who they are onto the world of psychology/psychiatry?

‘Projection’.. is used often times as an excuse when truth is being seen. I have had people tell me that I was ‘projecting’ when I was seeing exactly who they are… and they were ‘trying’ to deflect it away from themselves…

Have you ever had this happen? I am extremely self-reflective… and people who try to ‘claim’ that I am ‘projecting’ usually make me laugh outloud…

What do you think, is this an accurate quote? “We don’t see things as they are, we see them as we are.”