Monthly Archives: April 2011

Dating, Love

What are the ways that a man woos a woman…

how does he court her, romance her, connect to her heart… and win her love and affection?

A woman and a man need intimacy to connect.. that means looking into each others eyes, talking from and through the heart, not ‘preaching’ about ‘plans’ and all that you ‘think’ that you know. It’s not boasting, showing off. It’s not a car, or things.
 
Sure, we, women, all know that a man likes to strut his stuff, or whatever he has, or it may be. But if he is too into strutting and not into her, she will look at him as a kind of buffoon. And she will never really care about him. Oh, she might care about his car, or his bank account, but if he doesn’t win her heart… it’s all for naught. 

It’s in the heart where we truly connect.. it’s kindness, thoughtfulness, caring, empathy, and sincerity.

It’s taking the time to learn what she likes and cares about.

 
It’s caring and a sincere interest…and if you don’t look her into her eyes, she feels unseen and it all falls apart…  Playboy types know how to seduce and to woo… the regular fellow looking for a real love connection might want to be aware and learn the art of courtship.
 
It’s putting another first… it’s not what he can get, as in sex (as an immature, emotionally stunted playboy or con uses it for)… It’s what he can give…it’s not rushing her to his goal, plan, and agenda. It’s getting to know her and showing her that she is genuinely liked for her positive attributes as well as her quirks. That’s if a man is sincere in wanting a lasting heart connection…
 
It’s what he can give of himself, in time, and genuine communication in sharing experiences, helping her, laughing with her, and sharing with her. 

When he is with her, if the event, the movie, the car that he is driving is more important than she is, then why is she there? She will wonder…And will feel like an object herself…

When a couple connects at the heart and intimacy level… this is when real romance that leads to love, a true connection and what a man ultimately desires great sex… but the need for sex is really more a need to connect to the magnificent feminine energy.

It’s the man that woos the woman. If a man can’t be aware and learn these skills, he will find himself alone, or with an unhappy woman, and without the way to get his innate emotional needs met and satisfied by the allure, charms and abundance of a woman. And the woman will feel alone, cut off from her innate charms, beauty and desires.

It’s a man that woos and a woman responds… but there needs to be something to respond to…

A man gives. A woman receives… it’s plain and simple… it’s biology…

You can tell by observing a couple, how good a man is at fulfilling his lady by the look on her face.

A woman in love glows… and she bestows this glow and the magic and wonder of her femininity on her man… and this is where most men want to be and to be the benefit of…

Men… it is about the woman.. if you make it about her and are sincere, you will have everything and much more than you could ever ask for or dream of…
 
As a woman, what makes you feel cared for by a man? What are some of the wonderful ways that a man has and can do to woo, or court you, in order that you soften enough to open your heart to him?

Self-help

Insecurity! Our individual blight that spills onto others…

Looking honestly and sincerely at yourself… can be a difficult thing to do.

It takes a secure person to admit what they are insecure about in themselves… but when you are able to recognize, accept and work on your personal insecurities, you will live a more actualized, self-contained, emotionally healthy life with less harm done to those around you. 

How does one become more secure in self? I believe that it comes from self-reflection and evaluation. Examining situations and how you interact and react with others and taking the time to look at both sides, not just how you ‘think’ that it is, or how you ‘think’ that someone is, but to see things from both sides, even all sides. When you feel a certain way, examine why… look into yourself to see if what you feel is real, imagined, or a distortion. 

Example: If you are jealous, but can’t, won’t, or don’t see that in yourself, how can you release it? You can’t! You need to be able to recognize what you are feeling and why you have the emotional reactions that you do, in order to grow, shift and change out of it.

To be able to identify what you are insecure about is key. I bet most don’t give it a thought. They just go through life reacting, blaming and projecting onto others…

So, what are your insecurities? Can you identify them? Some insecurities are deep and painful, while others are right on the surface and fairly easy to see then some we aren’t even aware of.

At times, I feel insecure about my appearance. I feel insecure that perhaps, I am not doing as much as I should be…  Why am I here? What is my life for? When I was younger, I might’ve felt insecure, if I didn’t feel like I was wearing a ‘cool’ outfit or if I ‘felt’ overweight…I think that I have behaved in varying levels throughout the years in some of the behaviors in..The Insecure Woman

And we also have The Insecure Man

But now, I am mostly just insecure concerning my direction on the planet. Am I doing what I was placed on this planet to do? Am I fullfilling my highest destiny?

If and when you are feeling insecure and lacking… volunteer to help in your community in some form (not just to get your photo in the paper, or so that you can brag about what you are doing) because when you think about others and put others first, often times, you can step out of yourself. Then when you come back to self, you might be able to see yourself more clearly. Also, accomplishments of worthwhile things, over-coming and striving, in competition with yourself and challenging yourself, builds confidence and helps a person to fill up their insecurity holes…

Be competitive with yourself not others… set your personal goals and strive to achieve them.

The more that you recognize and fill up your insecurities, the less that you will have the need to lash out, respond with insecurity, turn to addictions, or project your insecurities onto others. You will be at peace and honest in yourself and that is good for everyone concerned…

I think that the older you get, if you have been self-evaluating along the way, you come to a point where you know who you are and can more easily identify your weaknesses and blind spots… What do you think? 

What are your insecurities? Are you brave and secure enough to recognize them and to share?

Look to the left and click to follow…

Relationships

Intimacy…

To feel loved and to be loved, there must be intimacy. I am not talking sex, I am talking intimacy. Sex can be an expression of intimacy and when there is real intimacy, sex is usually fulfilling, even great, leading to the kind of sex where you look deep into one another’s eyes and that takes you to a place out of this world.

‘Playboys and girls’ confuse sex with intimacy because they are emotionally fearful and insecure. Therefore, they ‘play’ at it.. nothing is real, or for keeps. 

Intimacy can be scary. No matter how much we say we want it, most of us are really terrified of getting close to another

We’re afraid to be seen for who we really are – especially the parts we don’t like about ourselves.

And some of us have so many parts that we don’t like, we spend most of our energy trying to keep those parts hidden – not just from others, but from ourselves, too.

But if you are hiding a part of yourself, how can anyone get to know you enough to really love you? They can’t. You can’t be intimate and love, or be loved because you are too focused on hiding who you are. Therefore, you won’t feel loved and neither will those around you.

One definition of Intimacy: familiarity: close or warm friendship; “the absence of fences created a mysterious intimacy in which no one knew privacy.” 

If you have too many fences, you won’t be able to feel, or to be intimate. That mysterious intimacy that leads to fulfillment will be null and void.

The self-imposed need to be ‘perfect’ can block intimacy. As a woman, if you think that you need to look perfect all the time, be at a certain weight and have on the perfect outfit…intimacy takes a back seat.

As a man, if you think that you need to earn a certain amount of money, have the right job, and know almost everything, then intimacy will take a back seat. Overly focused on image and intimacy is diminished… that master of the universe persona to impress, actually distances. Many times, overly focused on business, or sports, TV, or games is to avoid feelings… to avoid intimacy.

Often times, when intimacy is shared, an insecure person will sabotage it by anger, distancing, avoidance, or by pulling rank…. they feel too close for comfort, so they must either consciously or subconsciously do something to alleviate that ‘too close for comfort’ feeling…while it’s what they really desire…one step forward and three steps back.

It takes an internally secure person to be truly intimate with another, to be able to risk, share insecurities, and to express when and where they feel down and inadequate.

Intimacy is developed over time. I am not talking here about emotionally throwing up too often, or too soon especially when you first meet. To do this is needy and shows an emotional instability… But sometimes, a couple just clicks and they are able to talk deeply…then again, if too much is revealed, it can cause embarrassment at a later date. Vulnerability is like undressing emotionally. Therefore, to develop intimacy over time is the wisest. 

Also, as intimacy is shared it is wise not to use revealed vulnerabilities to hurt, or in anger. To do so, obviously will shut down intimacy. Protect and cherish, as private and sacred, vulnerabilities shared,  this will create a more sacred intimacy and that is what we all deeply long for, admit it or not.

We have been conditioned to think that romance must be ‘perfect’ when in reality romance and love are imperfect. And in that imperfection it becomes perfect.

We come together in romantic love for the purpose of growth, healing, intimacy and companionship… which leads to security, peace and a kind of a wonderful joy at being loved for who you are. If you can’t do that for another, how can someone do that for you? If you can’t do that for yourself, how can you do it for another?

To love and be intimate with another, is to reveal who you really are, and to be and feel loved for the sincerity of self and when you give and accept that in a relationship, you will feel loved.

If you aren’t able to love yourself, warts and all, will you be able to love another warts and all? We all have warts….no matter how hard we push them away and try to hide them, we all have them!

If you can’t love and accept yourself,  how can you love and accept another and be truly intimate?

Intimacy is the key to love, the key to feeling loved and the key to bonding between two people. It’s the ability to look deeply into yourself with acceptance then deeply into the eyes of another in acceptance.

The ability to accept those things that you don’t like about yourself (doesn’t mean that you don’t work to improve yourself) and the things that you might have shame, or remorse about can be revealed and you feel accepted with the right person. Acceptance of those things in others and self leads to intimacy and real love.

Do you accept yourself warts and all? Can you accept another warts and all?
Are you secure enough in yourself to be intimate?

Have you ever thought about what intimacy is?

Look to the left of the blog and click to follow…

Women In Real Life

Words, phrases, and names that I am sick and tired of hearing…

Racist – bigot – amazing – at the end of the day – Obama – Oprah – Obamacare – Michelle Obama – Barack – Lady GaGa – Jesse Jackson – Al Sharpton – Barry Soetoro -The View – diet –  Muslim – Pelosi – sugar is bad – salt is bad  – affirmative action – to each for their own needs – socialism – tax the wealthy – kill the rich -global warming – green house gases – the black race is under priviledged – Al Gore – push 1 for English, push 2 for Mexican – booty – booty call – Vajayjay (wasn’t it Oprah that started this stupid BS word for part of a woman’s anatomy?) – will you take this survey? – hater- Sharia Law – burka – redistribution – entitlement – new age – progressive – liberal – politically correct…

Are some of these on your list? If so, which ones? Then add yours to the list…
And look to the left and click to follow…

Women In Real Life

Obese by Easter…

2 Comments


Easter2I love Easter Candy! I just love it! Jelly beans, Brach’s jelly beans, gourmet jelly beans, any and all jelly beans… and chocolate eggs! Brach’s malted-chocolate-covered eggs are one of my fav!Easter3

Then there’s Cadbury royal dark chocolate eggs coated with a crisp sugar shell. I so love dark chocolate!

Easter10

Pangburn’s of Texas makes a millionaire $ bunny…pecans and honey caramel covered in milk chocolate.

I try to limit what I buy and therefore, my consumption because each time around Easter candy time, I gain about five pounds!

Easter9Some years, I am better than others at limiting… but this year.. I gotta admit! I am not doing so well with my limitations of Easter Candy…either buying or consuming…

I munch some after lunch, mid-afternoon and at night…

As soon as Easter candy time is over, my Easter candy five
Easter7 pounds drops in days and like Easter bunny magic, I am back to normal…  which goes to show how easily empty sugar calories add weight…but until then…

I am munching.. munching… Easter time munching…Can anyone relate?

Happy Easter…bunnies!!!

Inspirational/Spiritual

I am a dictator. I rule the government. I rule you…

8 Comments

You are not individuals. You are a collective. I know what is best for you. You are all equal, mushed all together. And I am above you. No one has more than another in talents, looks, or benefits because of their family lineage, work, or genetics as that would be unfair. I make you all the same. Work hard and gain and I can take it away then give it to whom that I choose, or keep it for myself.

As if in a concentration camp, you must all think alike, be alike, and be equal.  You are easier to control that way. Whatever you have that another doesn’t have, I can take from you and give to them. Soon, you must dress alike and all must have a number. I must know your count. There is no privacy.
I know all about you.

I can lie to you, but you can’t lie to me. If you do, you will be prosecuted.

I can vilify any group that I choose and you will believe what I say. I can tell you that Jews are bad, or the wealthy are bad and you will believe me. I can create class warfare, race warfare, religious warfare and then change it around to vilify another. I can cause you to kill one another. I can blame whom I choose to blame for whatever I do, or don’t do.

It’s all my agenda…
 
You may think that you can figure it out, but I convulute it so that you cannot. Confusion is my game, Leviathan is my name. You have become lazy and stupid, so easily led. I dumbed you down for my purposes.

At my orders, I can have you transported to where ever I desire.Jews from the Lodz ghetto are loaded onto freight trains for deportation to the Chelmno extermination camp. 
You will do as I say, as I tell you it is for you good, when it is quite the opposite.

Any talent or intelligence, I will use, or tax to my advantage, or it will be taken away. If you have beautiful hair, I can shave it off. If you have beauty. I can destroy it, If you have health, I can take it away at my whim. I decide what beauty is and what it isn’t. I tell you what to like and what to not like. If you have a talent, but go against me, I can have you ignored. I can turn the tide against you. I can change the meanings of words when I deem it necessary to further confuse and to keep you off center.
 
I can experiment with your life and your body. I can tell you what to eat and how much, or that you can’t eat at all. I can force you to inoculate your children, and if you don’t do as I say, I can take your children away, and put you in prison. I can tell you what to drive and how far and I can track your car and where-abouts. I can listen to your phone conversations. When you travel, you are searched. I can track you where ever you go. I put the prices on items and commodities, things that you need to live. I can make it so that you can’t get them, or afford them. I create the need then take away what you need to fullfill it. I am all powerful. You are not.

You can fight or challenge me, but I will win. I can make your life miserable. I can take your possessions, tie you up in the court system for life, imprison you, and yours and ruin your reputation by my control of all thoughts in the airwaves. I control the media, the school system, your healthcare, your life.

I create wars for my benefit. I create the stress that keeps you from thinking. If you have a business, it’s only if I allow it.

I am your god. I am your mother, your father, your family. I am your authority. I educate you and keep you dumb. I pick what you will learn. I hide what I don’t want you to know, or see. Everything you see, hear, or read is what I want you to see, hear and read. You believe what I tell you to believe. I can tell you that it is for your own good, then do as I like. It’s all for me, not you. You don’t matter, unless it benefits me.

I control your mind. I will repeat it often enough that you believe whatever I say about anything. I control you.

I will reward my followers and punish my critics and enemies. Try to expose me and I will annihilate you. 

If you work for me, you work for god because I am the god of your life and your world. You do not matter, I do. You feed me. And for you, it is “Freedom through work.” You will believe that this is your truth, or you will die. It matters not to me. I tell you what is true and what is not. You are only commodity to keep me running. I matter you don’t. I can tax then take what you have then sort through it.
I can take your home, all your belongings and your life.

One is for the many and I control the many.

I know your secrets and can destroy you at my whim.

You gave me all the power and I took the rest when you weren’t looking. You are too weak and stupid to think on your own. You need me. I am a dictator. I am the government. I am the authority.
I rule over you. Without me, you have no rights, no freedom, no life. It was not difficult for me to get to where I am in your world and in your life. You believed me, not yourself. You do as I tell you to do. I am a dictator. I am the New World Order where the evil infiltration of oppression controls the world. I rule over you…I am the authority that controls you…I rule, dominate and control everything in your world. I dictate all that governs over you…

My only opponent is your belief that I don’t and that you are free.

(What began as a way to protect the rights of an individual has been infiltrated and changed.)

Women In Real Life

Gas! Blow me away….

It began usual enough. On a windy day in Texas, I filled up my car with gas and was blown away in more ways than one.

It cost close to 50 bucks!

Gas has gone up 24 days in a row and is a dollar a gallon more than this time last year…

Okay! How high do you think it is going to go?

Have gas prices affected how much you drive and if so how?

Have you cut back on other things because of the gas prices?

What do you think is the real reason for the price rise?

Do you think that we should drill in America?

My opinion is that it’s orchestrated price fixing…
that they are playing games with us! If gas is up, it will make most everything cost more…

What’s your opinion?

Inspirational/Spiritual

The windows of the soul…


Eyes… A good spirit will shine through them … and an evil spirit can be revealed by looking into them.

Observe the eyes… Are they clear? Do they look directly at you? Is there life in the eyes? Does a clear, honest spirit shine through them? Does love shine through?

In a person connected to the good in their spirit, there is a light that shines through their eyes and this cannot be faked. Michelle Obama
Some people, even when they smile have dead eyes.  I challenge you to look at the eyes…deep into the eyes. Look at the eyes of politicians, news persons, TV personalities and people in your life. Focus your attention to their eyes… that is where you will find their truth, not in their words. The source and intent is in the eyes.

Many Muslims have dead eyes. Look and observe, don’t take my word for it.

A sociopath has dead eyes and a dead stare. As they lie to you, their eyes will give it away, if you will clearly observe. 

Then listen to the voice… not the words, but the voice… the quality of the voice. A voice originates deep inside the essence of a person. It can reveal, if it comes from a place of goodness, dishonesty, or corruption? Do they manipulate their voice, or is it pure and sincere? Does the voice repeat, over-emphasize, lecture, talk down to, or shout? Is it contrived for purpose? Are the words contrived, or do the words and voice come from the heart? Does it hurt your ears or repulse you to even hear it?

The energy of the person. Is it upbeat and honest, or contrived and forced? Some people appear as if they aren’t even in their body, such as Pelosi, Reid, Michelle Obama and Joy Behar, to name a few… As if a body-snatcher took away their essence and left them vacant and vapid… easily able to be taken over and told what to do and to think. Those promoting the new world order have a robotic vacant and vapid stare. The evil eye is very real.  It is glassy, cold, and reveals a person without conscience, one that has been taken over by EVIL…
One definition of ‘evil’ is to have no compassion for your fellow man with the ability to act on it. Add to that, the ability to ‘pretend’ and to ‘lie’ that you have compassion for your fellowman, in order, to manipulate and control them, then acting on it to their destruction and you have out-of-control, insideous evil. What could ever be more evil than that? Recall Hitler?….  
Observe the eyes of dictators…Rep. Michele Bachmann (R-MN) announces the formation of the Tea Party Caucus in Washington

Michelle Bachman comes across full of life with light in her eyes, in her voice, and in her energy. Her eyes reflect peace, joy and honesty.


This is a photo of Anne Frank … joy is in her eyes, essence and energy…

Many children have a kind of joy and light in their eyes…

Reagan had a light in his eyes… a glow about him…Looking through the eyes of love… 

Those without it can try to emulate it. But it is impossible, as the light in the eyes is something that a person either has or has not.

The light in the eyes is something that you are born with. It is your individual soul shinning though.

Those with the light find it very difficult to lie.. those with dead eyes can lie without blinking, or missing a beat…

And the evil ones enjoy trying to suck the energy and light from those who have it…

Those without the light and who can recognize it in others, ‘those full of evil and envy’, will try to diminish and even steal the light from others by trying to control for their purposes. Control is evil. Freedom of choice is of God. Think about this – Guidance is one thing. Control is quite another.

I challenge you to observe the eyes of those in the public ‘eye’ and those in your life.

The eyes are the windows to the soul…Many things can be contrived, lied about and used to con… but this is one thing that can’t be faked. So learn to observe it.
 
The light in the eyes shines from the essence of the soul and is a gift from God….

Share who you think has light in their eyes along with those that don’t.

Humor

Geography of a Woman….

       
 Between 18 and 22, a woman is like Africa .. Half discovered, half wild, fertile and naturally beautiful!
 
 Between 23 and 30, a woman is like Europe ..
 Well developed and open to trade, especially for someone of real value.
 
 Between 31 and 35, a woman is like Spain… very hot, relaxed  and convinced of her own beauty.
 
 Between 36 and 40, a woman is like Greece…
 gently aging, but still a warm and desirable place to visit..
 
 Between 41 and 50, a woman is like Great Britain, with a
 glorious  and all conquering past.
 
 Between 51 and 60, a woman is like Israel…. has been through
 war, doesn’t make the same mistakes twice, takes care of business.
 
 Between 61 and 70, a woman is like Canada.. self-preserving, but
 open to meeting new people.
 
 After 70, she becomes Tibet…Wildly beautiful, with a
 mysterious past and the wisdom of the ages….. An adventurous
 spirit and a thirst for spiritual knowledge.
 
 THE GEOGRAPHY OF A MAN
 Between 1 and 80, a man is like Iran , ruled by nuts.

Love

Love Love Love…All we need is love…

But what is love?
One definition – An intense feeling of deep affection.

Have you ever felt really loved?

Have you ever been in love?

Have you ever felt deep down out of control amazingly wonderfully in love?

How do you know when you feel love for another?

How do you know when you are loved?

What makes you know that you are loved?

How do you know when you are in love?

DO YOU BELIEVE THAT LOVE CAN BE ALL ENDURING and last forever?

Does everyone have the ability to love?

Do you have the ability to really love?