This MAN made contact with me because he wanted to be interviewed for Women Explode. I thought that this might be really interesting to have someone so eager to share information.
MAN: Marriage is the ultimate. There are more advantages.
ANN: What are the advantages of being married?
MAN: Financial partnership, setting goals together, like trips that we might want to take.
ANN: So, marriage is for finances?
MAN: Of course, a part of it. Anyone would say that?
ANN: What about the emotional connection?
MAN: Oh that, too. That goes without saying.
ANN : But you mentioned financial first. I would think the emotional connection is most important. That someone cares about you, is there for you.
MAN: Well, sure.
ANN: Are you successful in your business?
MAN: Yes. I am an EXPERT in what I do.
ANN: Really, an expert. Why do you think that you have been single for 10 years, if you are desiring a committed relationship?
MAN: I just haven’t met the right woman.
ANN: What is the right woman? What attributes are important to you?
MAN: Attractive, intelligent, physically fit, good sense of humor, likes the out of doors, likes nice things, nice dinners…and be adventurous, good at setting goals.
ANN: Do you have these attributes?
MAN: Yes.
ANN: Adventurous, in what way?
MAN: Like, if I wanted to take a trip that she would be ready to go.
ANN: So, you want her to be spontaneous and do what you want to do when you want to do it?
MAN: Umm, yeah, to take trips when I want… and…well, sure when she wants.
ANN: How important is appearance to you?
MAN: Very. And she must be physically fit. I was 75 pounds overweight for five years and all I could meet was FAT women. I am not wanting to be with a FAT woman. Being fat is one reason that I haven’t met anyone.
ANN: Over-weight people meet and fall in love everyday and are happy.
MAN: But, I don’t want a FAT woman. So, I lost weight. I will never be fat again. I didn’t want to lose weight then be stuck with some FAT woman or have to motivate her to lose weight. How old do you think I look?
ANN: 50ish.
MAN: Most people think I am MUCH younger than my age.
ANN: How about age in a woman?
MAN: I want someone around my age. So that, we have commonalities. Being with an older woman, would make me feel old. She wouldn’t be able to keep up with me.
ANN: What if she was fit, attractive and adventuruous?
MAN: Like Sally Fields?
ANN: Do you know Sally Fields?
MAN: (shakes head)
ANN: There are a lot of ‘older’ women that are great looking, in great shape, and rock. That, perhaps, even you couldn’t keep up with and are more adventurous than you.
MAN: Doubt it.
ANN: Have you heard of this 3 date rule. That sex is expected to occur on or soon after the third date.
MAN: Ridiculous! Because it could occur on the first date.
ANN: The first date?
MAN: Yeah.
ANN: Isn’t that a bit soon? Why do you think these days that sex is expected so early?
MAN: Today, life is lived in sounds bites. If it doesn’t happen fast, it doesn’t happen.
ANN: Sound bites, really. Do you think that there is a spiritual component to sex?
MAN: (ponders) Funny, you should say that. Yeah, body, mind soul connection, sure.
ANN: And you think this could occur on a first date?
MAN: Well, not… well, it …
ANN: Do you meet women online??
MAN: Yeah, I call it, FLAKES DOT COM… they are all flakes.
ANN: So, why be on there?
MAN: (shrugs)
ANN: What’s chemistry mean to you?
MAN: Touching hands, wanting to touch the other person. ( he reaches his hand towards mine)
ANN: (I pull back) When you look at your past relationships, what did you do that might have contributed to their demise?
MAN: I was impatient and I sweated the small stuff.
ANN : That was the cause of the endings?
MAN: Yes. And I was the ONE that ended them, NOT the women.
ANN: Do you have any regrets ending them? SInce, it’s so difficult to meet the ‘right’ one.
MAN: NO.
ANN: Have you ever really been in love?
MAN: Sure…about five or six times.
ANN: Really, that many. What is something that is a deal breaker for you in a relationship? What turns you off?
MAN: If the woman becomes distracted when I am talking to her.
ANN: So, you want her full attention on you?
MAN: (nods)
ANN: Do you feel that you have learned from your past relationships?
MAN: Like if we were dating. (reaches hand across table)
ANN: (pull back) I have enough information.
MAN: You couldn’t have enough about me. There is much more.
ANN: Really, I do.
MAN: But if…
ANN: Excuse me. I’ll be back in a minute.
I get up to go the restroom. When I come back, he is gone.