Tag Archives: manners

Can you tell the quality of a person by looking at them?

???????????????????????????????Can you tell the stock  from where they derive, how they were reared, the values, morals and qualities that were instilled from their family and its lineage? Is it solid or not? Can you tell their health, their intelligence, their morality, their standards or lack of,  by their external appearance and how they present themelves? Can you tell by their eyes, their smile, their demeanor, their grrooming,  and the words they use,  whether or not they are a quality human being? Well, can you tell a good cook by sampling their food?… of course, you can!

It matters not the clothes that a person of real internal quality and worth wears because they will wear their clothes, their clothes won’t wear them.  Character trumps clothing everytime. You will notice a person i with quality of character before their clothing,  who they are  is clear and their clothing is only a part of it. Their clothes are secondary to who they are because who they are precedes everything else. Their clothing may or may not further define them in any given time. But in a person of low quality, you see what they are wearing before you even notice them or who they are. They may even wear things that glitter and shine to attract attention or to deflect from who they really are, so they can’t be seen clearly for what and who they really are. relying on their clothing to shout their existance and presence. You know the flashy types who always wear  the latest,  in the moment style, or the ones who put tatoos on their body, piercings, and do other things that mar and distort their natural body  beauty as in pink or green hair, etc.

Haven’t you seen a person of quality wearing a plain tee and jeans workout clothing, or oversized casual clothing as they mow their yard or do some other activity,  and their quality is seen, no matter what they have on or how momentarily grubby becasue their inner quality emanates even glows  from their being. It’s in the energy they emit and it’s one of sincere, internal quality. And haven’t you seen a person of no-quality wearing the finest of clothing and all you  could see is their clothes because there clothes were all there was to see? It’s as if the clothes are walking down the street on their own creating and carrying the image and existence of this empty being.

Now, of course, there are some people who have learned to mimic  quality and can fool the world or certain individuals  for awhile. But if you will really look and learn to discern, people of quality, internal value and worth have a certain look in their eyes, on their faces and in their walk no matter where they are, what they have on, or in what circumstances they may fine themselves. Although, there’s an old adage that you can’t see in another that which you don’t have in yourself.  I don’t know, is that always accurate or not?

A person of real quality, style and class is rarely appreciated by the masses because of their subtlety and refinement.  Often times, they move about with little notice. Quality doesn’t draw attention… it just is.

It’s internal confidence with no need for fakery. Sure, they may enjoy the latest fashion and have fun with it, but it’s not what defines them. What defines them is their internal moral adjuster, their conscience, their internal peace and knowing who they are in their being. It’s a heart, mind, body connection along with how they were reared, in what environment, along what they chose and allowed to have imprinted upon themselves.

We all tend to become a bit like those whom we associate with… so careful who you are around. My Dad used to tell me, “If you run with ducks, people will think you are a duck, and you are a swan.”

People of quality live in the pride of who they are and value themselves, their health, their well-being as well as that of others…

They wear clean, well-fitted garments, not too tight and not too loose and choose appropriate clothing and behavior for each situation and  circumstance. They are comfortable in their skin and selective about what they put on that skin and what and how they adorn themselves and their life.

Being appropriate in dress and behavior defines and separates the gentlemen from the clods, the ladies from the average and the ‘wanna be’s’ from the real.

The way a person presents themselves to the world, their dress and style, their voice tone,  their language use, the way they move, their grooming habits and if they will look you in the eye or not state who they are internally displayed externally.  Clear speech is one of the hallmarks of class. Class doen’t mumble and rarely uses slang except as appropriate to occasion.   Appropriateness or not, time and place  is key.

My opinion, one of the rudest, most lowly, classless activities, I see these days is that of being glued to cell phones, etc. Those who walk, drive and even interact with others  with their eyes on their phone… no person of quality does this.

Think about it… we create our appearance, it comes from the deep-seatedness of  who we are and is expressed outwardly in everything we do, wear, say, eat, walk, talk, and with whom  we associate. Quality was at one time valued … we knew what it was when we saw it, appreaciated it and many more had it.

It’s quality. It’s class. It’s the best. It’s the rarity. It’s something to strive for. People and parents who don’t have it can’t teach and model it.

Quality… seems these days, it’s on its way to being lost and a thing of the past.

Quality is innate and rare . It’s a reflection of breeding through the generations.  It’s a value that we need not only bring back but to learn to recognize and appreciate. Quality of character seeps through one’s pores…

Look to the left and click to follow…

How a person eats can tell you much…

???????????????????????????????Do they have manners and know the appropriate etiquette? Do they shovel the food in like they haven’t eaten in days?  Do they chew with their mouth open? Do they serve themselves first, begin eating and not wait for you?

Are they overly picky?  Are they sloppy? Do they savor each bite and enjoy? Or do they shove the food in barely tasting it?…

Ever had a man order before the woman? I had this happen once and I left the table not to return…

There is a time to eat mannerly and a time to pick it up with fingers… do they know the difference?

There are correlations between how a person eats and how they do other things in their life such as making love. Eating habits and manners reflect not only up bringing, class, education, self-awareness, awareness of others and HA!…whether you can take someone to a black tie dinner.

Many times, eating precedes sex.. and is a way to seduce and create romance… but not with a person who has bad eating manners…or a person who stuffs themselves then lays on the sofa in a coma.

I dated a man once and eating with him was a painful experience. He would shovel the food in quickly. And rip it a part, as in onion rings, so he could shovel it in faster… He would touch my food. He had no idea how to serve. He would nod his head and grunt, make noises as in ‘good food’. He was more interested in how much he was getting into his mouth than the quality of it… which is the opposite of me.  Meal time wasn’t a time to communicate, it was to eat. He wanted to get his food into his mouth and fast, so he could get some more. When I think back, he was a poor communicator and he was unsophisticated and inexperienced in his selections of food and restaurants…just plain all around boring…

Watching him eat turned me off so much that I would look away and was even embarrassed to be in a restaurant with him. I was invited to a party during the time I knew him, and chose not to go, if I was to go with him. Of course, I quickly stopped seeing this man as his eating habits reflected in other areas in his life. He was disgusting. My main memory of him is the vision of him eating and it repulses me…and I avoid the restaurants where the memories of this slob pop into my head.

In my worthy relationships, eating is fun, sensuous, a time to be together, cook together, wine and dine together… to create wonderful memories…I enjoy a man who knows how to wine and dine and I love to cook for the ‘right’ man…and enjoy having him cook for me.

Food, eating and its preparation can be fun, sensual and sexy….Manners or not while eating reveal much. Do you agree?

What have your experiences been in this area?