Tag Archives: kindness

I am exploding… race war just north of Dallas…

Pullinghair3When I got gas today then walked in to pay… a large black man held the door open for me a long time…. as me, a petite white woman, parked places away had a distance to walk… but this gentleman spotted me and held the door open anyway….

I said,  “Thank you kind sir.”

He said, “You bet, ma’am.”

In the Quik Trip while paying, I noticed a black couple talking to a white man about the horrors that occurred in downtown Dallas.

Everyone was polite, kind and respectful to one another.

There is no race war except what as been inflamed by Obama and his evil minions to those who are fragile, on the edge and stupid enough to buy into it. I see nothing but kindness to one another among the races where I live along with respect for the police, ‘our protectors’.

My hair stylist is a black woman…. I don’t even think of her race… we are friends… And she has commented several times, that ‘they’ are trying to create friction between the races…

People who can think … see what is going on….it’s orchestrated war between the races and our police…. and it’s orchestrated for agenda by evil…

All lives matter!

God bless and keep us all!

What inspires you to love?

TreeAnn6Is it beauty, fun, kindness? Is it sex, liking the samethings, or experiences shared? Is it commonalities, differences, or the energy you feel when you are with the person? Is it their actions, words, or that their words and actions match? Is it consistancy, compatiblity, tension or comfort?

Is it inconsistancy, uncertainty, excitement, thrill,  or danger?

Different things attract  the inspiration to love. Some of the attractions are healthy and some not. Sometimes, it’s a mixture of the good and the bad? Some people think they love someone when they feel like they felt with their parents or caregivers. They attract to the familiarity of whatever they experienced then, so it ‘feels’ like love, ‘like home’, when perhaps, it isn’t. It’s just familiar, like a habit, but  it’s what ‘feels’ comfortable, like an old shoe and so they think it’s love.

If the past was healthy and nurturing that is great, but if it was one of discord, addictions or dyfunction, not so great. Those imprinted patterns are difficult to break and they can guide either to goodness or destruction.

So, ponder what inspires you to love and attracts you to someone as it’s the basis of the relationship, its journey, its joys, its pain, its success, its harm, or failure.

“But does he who loves someone on account of beauty really love that person? No; for the small-pox, which will kill beauty without killing the person, will cause him to love her no more.

And if one loves me for my judgment, memory, he does not love me, for I can lose these qualities without losing myself. Where, then, is this Ego, if it be neither in the body nor in the soul? And how love the body or the soul, except for these qualities which do not constitute me, since they are perishable? … We never, then, love a person, but only qualities.”  Blaise Pascal’s “Pensees”

The above is an example of shallow love…

We all lose our ‘qualities’ eventually  and when we do, is when we will know if we are loved and if we love.

The awareness, blessing and grace to love without the distraction of qualities and traits is  a genuine gift and if we love sincerely love  will  eventually evolve into this.

What attracts you to love someone? Ever really thought about it deeply, beyond the face, figure, abs, smile, etc?

“Never love anyone who treats you like you’re ordinary.”

Oscar Wilde

Look to the left and click to follow…

Don’t mistake my kindness for weakness…

What ???????????????????????????????does this statement mean to you?

So often when a person is kind, many will ‘assume’ that they can be taken advantage of, or that they are a pushover… Why do you suppose that is?

I have had this happen to me many times in my life… and when I realize and see what their angle is … They soon realize that my kindness does not mean weakness, or that I am a pushover…

Predators, cons, shifty, playboy, playgirl, manipulator, social climber types… attract into kind people and try to play on their good hearts…. They see, or ‘even search out’ someone kind and ‘presume’ that they can manipulate and control them for their benefit… while often doing much harm to the person of kindness…

As we become more aware of this and as our world gets less kind… is this, perhaps, creating an environment where the truly kind-hearted hide their light to try and avoid the dark?

I know that I have become more cautious, less open, guarded,… I want to see who a person is, before I interact ‘too much’. I only want kind, moral, high-valued people in my inner circle who ‘value’ and ‘appreciate’ me for the kind person that I am and who realize that kindness is not weakness, but is a kind of true deep strength.

But there are some who feign ‘kindness’ only to suck people in…

What do you think?…

How many of these traits do you possess?

???????????????????????????????Integrity

The true definition of integrity comes from the Latin word integritas, which means “whole” or “intact.” It encumbers all the traits that make a truly “good” person, such as honesty, being incorruptible, straight and morally upright. A person with integrity won’t lie. They will keep their word and won’t screw you over. They won’t go behind your back, badmouth you, go after another person’s partner or cheat on you. they adhere to a code of ethics that may make them predictable, but safe to the heart and one’s sanity. No unpleasant surprises come from someone with a high sense of integrity. They follow a code of ethics that tends to be, as the word suggests, incorruptible, and they adhere to principles of common decency.

Courageousness

Who wants to be with a coward? Someone who can’t and won’t stand up for their own beliefs will definitely not stand up for you or anyone else. Courageousness may not seem like such a big deal to some, but upon examining history, one notices that cowards are not too different from criminals. Why? Because most atrocious crimes to mankind would not have succeeded had it not been for the silent bystanders and those who looked the other way. No courage usually also means no principles, which will make you expendable for the simple reason that a coward will only do the least effort required and will tug tail and run when true work is required.

Sense of Humor

There will be good times, bad times, hard times and easy times. And everything is easier if one keeps a sense of humor, or at least surrounds oneself with those who have one. There is a reason that poll after poll shows that most people desire a sense of humor in their partners.

 Intelligence, Education and Common Sense

Plenty of people have high IQs and no common sense. Common sense, social intelligence and “street smarts” are pretty much the same. Being able to solve the most difficult mathematical problems won’t make anyone a great partner or friend, if they cannot hold a conversation, relate to other people and have zero social skills. Social skills or relating to others are abilities required to use common sense, which dictates what or what not to do or say in every day settings.

Emotionally Open

If you have ever tried to be friends or have a relationship with someone who has the emotional depth of a rock, you’ll know what I mean. How would someone who has a hard time feeling, or showing feelings, relate to you? There is a difference between someone who is so closed off that they just look at you blankly, or worse, scold you, or put you down when you’re feeling sad or miserable, and then there are those who break down as soon as someone looks at them the wrong way. Being able to share one’s heart doesn’t mean that one has to be a weakling or whiner. Someone who can’t feel is usually damaged goods, and lack of depth in emotional matters usually translates into lack of depth in other matters.

Kindness

Kindness is like integrity. A person who possesses kindness will usually keep your heart safe and your best interests in mind. Their willingness to help others also translates into someone who knows how to put another’s needs ahead of their own when needed. A kind person carries a light, and that light tends to attract other “good” people too.

Self-Confidence

Everyone is low on confidence now and then. But stay clear of those with literally no self-esteem. A person without self-confidence/self-esteem spells disaster, because they will fail on numerous other “must-haves.” They are usually driven by self-preservation, and will do almost anything to overcome their feelings of inadequacy. This can make them psychotic and distrusting, and possibly even make them into stalkers. Which, in return, almost always ensures dishonesty, a closed heart/inability to truly feel and experience love and joy, a lack of integrity and definitely no courage. They’re usually a bucket with a huge hole in the bottom. No matter how much love and care one will pour into them, it will never be enough to make them feel safe, loved or good enough. It’s impossible to love and care for someone who doesn’t love and care for themselves.

Discipline

Best to avoid those who have absolutely no discipline. It requires discipline to succeed in life. Anyone who throws in the towel at the first sign of difficulty or opposition will not make a great long-term companion. This is because discipline translates into stamina, i.e. staying power. A person who can’t stick with anything for a longer period of time because it’s uncomfortable, or means work, is someone who is either not confident or is lazy. If they can’t stick with their own goals, they won’t stick with you either.

Generosity

Those who constantly complain about the money they don’t have, especially while spending it on things that don’t serve them, are not only annoying, but are also no fun to have around. The opposite of generous is selfish, and who wants to be with a selfish person? Being miserly also tends to show individuals who are very preoccupied with material, i.e. superficial things. Combine that with the constant complaint about not having enough, and you’ll get a good picture of how life with someone who can’t be generous looks like.

Self-Awareness

Self-awareness is the fine middle ground of truly knowing your strengths and weaknesses without being either completely weak and self-loathing, or arrogant and narcissistic. Self-awareness allows us to know when we are way off our rocker. It allows us to see when we are wrong/screwed up and need to possibly adjust or change certain behaviors and patterns. Self-awareness allows us to look in the mirror and see who we really are; not who we think, or hope we are. People without self-awareness cannot grow, because they will never learn from past mistakes. They are literally blind and lost souls, stumbling after what looks and sounds the most appealing. Without self-awareness there is no truth, just illusion; and a perpetual cycle of trying to find what they think will make them happy.

If you don’t know who you are, you sure as hell won’t know what makes you happy. 

Okay! Do you possess most of these, all of these, or very few?