Category Archives: Self-help

Revealing or Hiding the Truth of ‘Your’ Being…

???????????????????????????????Anyone can pretend to be indifferent, or project an illusion of themselves that hides the truth of their being. It takes a helluva lot more strength and conviction to be real and risk pain than it does to hide and be safe, or rather be what you ‘think’ it safe.

We’ve all been hurt, disappointed, or made mistakes in some way and in varying degrees, but it is how we process that hurt that either clears us, or blocks us further. These are our lessons to be experienced here on earth…

So many of us are walking facades, hiding behind our job, our car, our clothes, our shoes, our title, our anger, our ‘religion’, in addictions, etc…. pretending what we ‘think’ we ‘should’  be…  that word ‘should’.. bad word. And all of this is temporary and of this earth…all we really have is our soul…

I have shared and exposed myself on my site for the purpose of awareness for others. I am an open, giving person and people like me put ourselves out there and sometimes it can be hurtful. Some have attacked and criticized me for my forthrightness and sharing. Instead of seeing the strength and courage it takes to be real, they twist it, in order, to suit their needs…???????????????????????????????

I am an upfront, tell it like it is, woman and sometimes this has gotten me ridiculed even attacked, but I am always true to me and what God guides me to be…It’s as if I was born with this gift, or curse, depending on how one looks at it and what is happening at the time and in any given moment. I have friends who tell me that they come to me when they want the truth. I have been told that I tell it like it is and they like that about me even though it ‘smarts’ at times. This is something that I have grown to be proud of about myself…

When I am not being ‘real’  and true to myself… I feel false and I ‘detest’ that feeling. It feels plain terrible to me…it makes me feel twisted up internally…

Others don’t and won’t stop me from being the real me and hopefully won’t stop you from being the real you… living in your truth. When you can acknowledge who you really are, is when you are set free. It may not be easy, but freedom of the spirit is the only way to really live.

We will always have our blind spots as human beings who live on earth, but the more we can live and be in the truth of what God meant for us to be individually by our genetics, personality and circumstances, the more truthful we will be to ourselves…

Here’s to the courage and conviction of being true to yourself!

Look to the left and click to follow …

The intent and emotion behind words…

???????????????????????????????Intent and emotion are more important than words. Intent and emotion give words their real meaning.

Are the words spoken with restraint, calculation, caution, manipulation, anger, deception, love, clarity… the same words, or phrase with different intent and emotion will have completely different meanings…

So, it’s not the words. It’s the intent … the emotion that matters…

Can you hear the emotion, the intent in the words spoken to you? We need to become able to listen with more than our ears. We need to listen and hear with all of our senses and most especially our gut instincts.

Some try so hard to hide their emotion, their intent, their pain, their agenda, that when they speak.. their words are so ‘contrived’ and full of hidden and conflicted meanings that everything about the words ring false…

When the purity of emotion, intent and the words come together is when it all rings true….

The pure of heart and intention can ‘usually’ identify and see the deception more readily than others, but sometimes, they can be the easiest to fool. Cons can see through cons as they say…

As people experience and age,’their intention behind the words radar’, ‘usually’ becomes keener. That’s why and how the youth are so easily swayed… and why people such as Obama go after them. They want to imprint them with their ‘contrived’ words used for their agenda…

As the world gets more and more corrupted… words are meaning less and less… it’s the emotion, the feelings, the intent that we all need to be hearing and listening for. What is the real meaning behind the words?

Words, these days, are being uses as a tool to manipulate…

Word masters and manipulators rely on their ‘words’ being taken at their face value…and in this day and time, this is exactly what we should not do.. take them at their first appearance. I say take them for their agenda and intention.

Obama is a prime example of this duplicity, where emotion, agenda, actions and intent do not match with his words…

Look up Leviathan… I have written about this often. Leviathan is the ‘devil’ of confusion, fog, misconception and duplicity, confusion in communication, in words, and he precedes Satan…And this is what is running rampant in our world today…

Learn to discern… see the emotions, the intent, the agenda behind and in the words… We must all do this, while viewing the public arena and also in our private lives. It’s imperative…

We all use the ‘same words’… it’s the intent, agenda and emotion in and behind them that matters…

After all, a lecherous playboy says the words, “I love you.” with ill-intent… while a person with sincere love in their heart uses the same words…One is true, the other false… it’s the intention, agenda, emotion that matters in the words used…

After all, “I hate you”… can even mean,”I love you”…in certain circumstances… can’t it, huh?

Actions match words, or it is crazy making… foggy… Leviathan-like … and this is what cons do.They want you to hear only their words and not to be able to see behind, through and in them…

“A rose by any other name will smell just as sweet.” Shakepeare

What is the ultimate betrayal?

cru6Is it if your husband, or wife has an affair? Is it if your sister has an affair with your husband?

Is it a President lying to the people and selling a country out? Is it a parent sexually abusing a child?  Is it any adult abusing a child?

Is it any lie?

Is it pretending to be something you aren’t  in order, to get, or to take something from someone?

Is it a husband gambling away all the family’s money? Is it a man fathering a child and denying its existence? Is it a mother having child after child with no knowledge of who their fathers are to gain money from the government? Is it a woman telling a man that she is pregnant to force him to marry her?

Is it killing another human being? Is it not wanting to hear the truth because then you would have to do something about the lie?  Is any lie a betrayal?

Is it telling someone that you love them for your own gain? Is it marrying someone for money? Is it saying the words, “I love you” to get sex?

Some definitions of betrayal:

1. a. To give aid or information to an enemy of; commit treason against: betray one’s country. b. To deliver into the hands of an enemy in violation of a trust or allegiance: betrayed Christ to the Romans.
2. To be false or disloyal to: betrayed their cause; betray one’s better nature.
3. To divulge in a breach of confidence: betray a secret.
4. To make known unintentionally: Her hollow laugh betrayed her contempt for the idea.
5. To reveal against one’s desire or will.
6. To lead astray; deceive.Is the ultimate betrayal, any evil, that intentionally hides itself in good?

So what, in your opinion, is the ultimate betrayal?…

Look to the left and click to follow…

Blown away by the way ‘some’ men…

Blackwhite24talk to a woman…
Okay… what would you think and do if a man solicited your attention repeatedly to offer his services in a business interaction. And finally, you respond because you ‘think’ that you ‘might’ have an interest in his service. It’s what he is offering you, you did not contact him. He sends you his resume and some samples of his work which appear fine.  

The first conversation with him is informative and interesting. But in the next phone conversation, he makes continual references to your body as being voluptuous. It could ‘sort of’ be excused, in that, you are talking about a character in a book. But he says your body is ‘voluptuous’ about six times and he asks personal questions. (red flags) And then in the next email, he writes that for his ‘pay’, he asks only that you marry him and never leave him… he also writes that you are beautiful and have a certain glow about you…

He also writes in an email that he showed your photo to a kid that lives above him and this kid said that you are ‘hot’.

You write back that this is sweet, but you are only interested in the  business project…besides, why would he show your photo to

His reply. “Dear, don’t nag.”

Your reply. “Excuse me?”

His reply. “Excuse you? Why, did you burp?”

Having experienced quite enough, you write back that you are not interested in any association with him and that you don’t appreciate him continually referring to your body.

Indignant, defensive and patronizingly, he replies that he was only being friendly. That you are being arrogant and you need to get over yourself because you are not all that attractive… and that ‘you’ need to apologize to ‘him’…because he was only sharing a ‘story’ about the kid, and that you are being too sensitive. And that you shouldn’t kick a ‘gift horse’ in the mouth.

HA!… soooo…Whew!  Yes… this happened to me and this from a man who has commented repeatedly for months that he enjoys my writing, agrees with me and my site. So, he ‘should’ know what I am about, or he ‘thought’ he did, or he doesn’t know how to conduct business, or he is a stupid oaf, because, if this had occurred in an actual place of business, his words would be considered sexual harassment.

So, over the Internet in a ‘business’ interaction this man disrespects me, comes onto me and when I call him out on it, instead of apologizing… he ‘tries’ to point the finger at me, put me down and patronize me. And he was the one continually talking about my appearance not me…

Also, when he first talked about my body, of course, I was offended, but I let it slide to gather more info, since I am becoming more aware everyday that ‘many’ men are ‘completely ignorant’ about how to talk and interact with a woman. Some seem to think that saying things like this man said to me are ‘compliments’. But what it does is to make a woman feel objectified and this is insulting on every level. Was that his intention? To pull some kind of ‘male dominance.’

Do men these days, because of movies and the way, in some cases, we see women being portrayed and disrespected and the way many women disrespect themselves, ‘think’ that they can interact in this manner?

I have never seen anything like what I am seeing today…sure there have always been the jerks and always will be. But the lack of manners, juvenile behavior, low respect level, and ignorance of ‘some’ men these days, goes beyond the pale… and it blows me away in shame for them. Are they so insecure and needy that they will take any and every opportunity to objectify, try to stick it to and take a woman down to their lowly level?

What do you think? Do you agree or not? And what would you have thought and what would you have done?

Look to the left and click to follow…

What a man really craves…

???????????????????????????????is EMOTION. Emotion that he can’t find in himself. Emotion that will make him feel like a whole man… a fulfilled man…a complete man…

A man may talk about what he ‘thinks’ of as “drama” in a woman — but emotion is something completely and entirely different than drama.

Emotion, ‘expressing emotion’, is the missing piece for a man. And many tie this craving and need to sex… because sex ‘temporarily’ helps ‘some’ men to ‘feel’. It’s allows him to lose himself…And sure some emotionally dead/damaged men and women can have sex without feelings, emotions, or much anything else… other than temporary escape.

But what they are really looking for is to feelto feel emotion… to experience those intense feelings that fill you up with emotion…glorious emotion. But it isn’t sex that does it… it’s the feelings, the emotions connected to the heart through sex that ‘can’ do it… And when you are in love, it can be emotionally bonding, otherwise…not so much.

When a man exclaims, ‘I had the most incredible evening with a woman’. He is ‘usually’ talking about having what ‘he considers’ great sex… and, or that the woman ‘touched his emotions’ That place in him that feels… and transcends himself… that makes him feel like more of a manmore whole and complete and in touch with his heart and soul…

Sex is a part of it, can be a part … but it is ‘only’ a part…

Some men, think it’s all sex and so do some women, especially, these days, when ‘some’ women are ‘acting’ and ‘behaving’ like men…and it’s allowing for no one being really ‘connected’ to anyone…including a connection to themselves… so the emotional connection to self and others is being further diminished… and there are more lost and desperate people roaming around looking for a place to connect. Hence all the ‘sexual promiscuity’ and ridiculous emphasis on sex when it is premature to the nature of the relationship or interaction. The needy and emotionally stunted put sex first before any connection because they are unable to make a deep, real connection…They can’t connect through real emotion so they connect by sex.

Males are looking to get out of their heads, into their hearts, bodies and into the emotion that they crave…

Emotion is what connects… the sharing of emotion and most women have it innately, unless they ignore, deny it, or have been damaged in some way.

The emotional connection is what a man craves…

Do you agree?…

What is it that you do that is a bit decadently crazy weird?…

 ???????????????????????????????Me?… Well, when I have an iced, ‘glazed’ donut, or sweet roll craving which is rare, but when it does occur, it can be quite intense….

I will lick, or bite the glazed icing off  munching just the crusty cake part that is closest to the icing then toss the rest away…

There is something about the fried taste with the sweet sugary glaze that just calls my name about once a year…

And when it does, I do it over and over again… eat and lick, eat and lick… doing this ‘satisfies’ me without all that dough stuff filling me up …

Donut holes are my best choice, less dough, don’t you know…

So, what is it that you do? It doesn’t have to be about food…. just about ‘whatever’, or anything…

We all have strange, ‘weird’ even a bit ‘crazy’ little things that we do. That well, ‘maybe’, we don’t really want others to be ‘privy’ too… and we ‘certainly’ do them in private…

I certainly wouldn’t do this lick, munch and throw away donut thingy in front of anyone….

Soooo what’s yours? We won’t tell anyone. Really, we won’t!!!
And don’t tell anyone about my donut glazed icing fetish… Ok? Okay!!!

So tell us … Tell! Tell! Tell!… and you don’t have to use your ‘real’ name…

Look to the left and click to follow,..

Whatever your focus, it is what’s bothering you…

???????????????????????????????If something is weighing on your mind, you can’t stop thinking about it and it rears its head in your focus…it’s what you need to look at, fix, repair, take care of, do, or learn about, or from… in order, for it to not be your focus…

If something doesn’t bother you, it’s not on your radar …and probably is pretty much working in your life just fine…

Example: If you have a pain in your neck, all you do is think of the pain and your neck…When the pain is gone, your neck doesn’t even cross your mind…

So, think about where, and what your focus is on…because that’s your issue or focus…. look at it, examine it, analyze it, if need be, and try your best to work on it, or to correct it..

HAHAHA!… then you can be open to go onto another issue that is bothering you… That’s life! Huh?

Example: My closet was bugging me. Each time, I walked in it… I thought, I need to clean it and clean it out. I need to. I need to get this done. Finally, yesterday, I spent hours doing just that…  and I felt so good having done it. But now, my drawers are bothering me and are on my mind… I need to clean them all out…

Make sense or not?… Ever felt this way, or had this happen?

So think about it, where’s your focus? What do you need to do, take care of, correct, work on… fix, etc?… Do it … so you can be open for more, to going on, going forward…

The Insidious Evil of Energy Suckers…

???????????????????????????????Okay! This is embarrassing, I am sharing it for awareness and as a warning…

When you are around someone, check in with yourself. How do you feel? Happy? Anxious? Insecure? Confident? Needy? Beautiful? Ugly?

It’s important to respect your feelings and to ask yourself WHY you’re having them. Are the feelings because of ‘your’ insecurity, sense of lack, jealousy, or dislike of self, being triggered around this person?

Or are you picking up on ‘how they feel about themselves’? Are they projecting their insecurity and unhappiness onto you. Is this person just bad for you? Is this person trying to drag you down to their level?

If you’re unsure, write down the pros and cons, doing this should reveal what you need to know.

Example: Years ago, I met a man who approached me about buying my car. On this premise, we interacted, but he soon dropped talking about my car and pursued me.

I really wasn’t interested, then he came on stronger. I still wasn’t attracted, but was in a lull in my life, so reasoned, he seemed pleasant enough (bad decision). I had parted from a man, after a four year relationship … five months earlier…so, was into myself and healing…

This man was obviously ‘after’ me, he kissed me one night which meant nothing to me. I was not into him and I told him so, yet he persisted (I continued seeing him, bad choice).

Even though he was pursuing me, I noticed, he never complimented me about anything. He never told me, I looked pretty, or what I was wearing was attractive. He said things like, “You’re ‘lucky’ to be thin. It must be your genetics.”  He gave me credit for nothing, attributing everything to ‘luck’.

He put me down, actually, made fun of me because I enjoy writing, and spiritual studies, that I workout regularly, that I like ballet, opera, art and the preforming arts, movies, etc. He didn’t understand why I had different kinds of art hung on one wall. He didn’t appreciate my eclectic decorating style. His tiny apartment looked like it was decorated by his mother, or grandmother and I learned that it was. It was horrible with granny curtains, etc.

He whined continually about his bad luck. He was turning out to be pretty much a drag. When he first met me, he ‘claimed’ to have money, but soon began whining about not having any. He dreamed about winning the lottery. I have never bought a lottery ticket.

He had lost his job as a pilot. So, ‘buy my car’…. yeah right! A friend, I’d known for 25 years, at my request, introduced him to a well-connected pilot, to try, and assist him in getting a job. What I got for being kind, was this man telling me, that ‘my friend of 25 years’ really didn’t like me. Just as my friend of 25 years told me that this man was bad mouthing me to her and that she didn’t think he was good for me, or that he was a ‘good’ man.

No good deed goes unpunished, huh? Of course, I confronted him and suggested that we all three meet to sort things out (I like to confront things head on, to clear the air) which, of course, he refused to do. I think you get the picture… (he was trying to separate me from my friend, while trying to make me feel bad and himself better)

One night, I was dressed in black linen slacks and a white linen designer halter top that wrapped around my waist. I was tan and felt wonderful. Even by my own high standards, I felt like I looked fab. He looked me up and down, then said, “What is that you have on? I have never seen anything like that. Why does it wrap and tie like that?”

I was determined to have a good time… so…

That night we went to an upscale restaurant of my choice (we had done burger, pizza, chinese food ad nauseam). The atmosphere and food were excellent. His comment. “They sure serve small portions. I am still hungry.” He had no ability to appreciate a refined ambiance, or to make an evening elegant.

He was always about himself. He sucked the glow out of me and everything we did.. He complained, whined and criticized most everything and everyone. When we would do things, he liked, I enjoyed them, but when we did things, I liked, he would whine and complain. Being a writer and screenwriter, I encouraged interest and appreciation in seeing all kinds of movies… more sophisticated than his usual fare. I enriched his life, while he was sucking the life out of me.

This man and I were from totally different worlds. He had never been out with a woman who wore designer clothing. He didn’t appreciate, who I was, or what I was about. He wanted who I am, but had no idea how to care for and feed a woman like me. He did not have the background, or experience to appreciate, or to understand me. So, he put me and everything about me down. His insecurity triggered his criticism and served to make me feel unappreciated and not seen.

There was a two week period where I ‘thought’ we might be ‘something’, but I soon became more and more uncomfortable around him, and realized that he and I had no business being together. Here I was, ‘dating’ a man, I had no interest in, in the first place, and his behaviors and words were making me feel bad (stupid, I know, and one reason, I am sharing this). 

He would never be up to my standards, while he was trying to take me down to his… a place, I felt uncomfortable and don’t belong.

I also realized that he was ‘copying’ even ‘mirroring’ me. He would state something, I had said, claiming it as his own, as if he was trying to be me. He was even envious of my skin tone…(he has a crush on Selma Hayek)  I tan easily and he is pink and freckly. Except, when he gets a spray tan, then he is ‘some’ color of orange. (Thinking back, I am repulsed that I even knew this man. Yet, at the time, I kept interacting like a fool.)

Then I got the picture! He wanted to be me. He even wanted my skin tone. He wanted under my skin and to be in my skin. He was envious of everything about me. 

He was passive/aggressive. There are all kinds and ways of abuse and this is one…an insidious one.

He was sucking off my energy every chance he got. He felt insecure about himself and I could tell he enjoyed it when I felt off base. Because when I was, he felt better about himself.  And for ‘some’ reason, I was allowing it.

I even became embarrassed to be with him, but being a kind person and self-reflective, I gave him the benefit of the doubt. Also, as I stated, I was in a lull and passing time. 

This man was uninteresting to me in all ways and this was one reason that he slipped under ‘my jerk alert radar’. I was not paying close enough attention to my feelings when I was around him, because I was using interacting with him as a diversion.

I wrote down why I liked him and why I didn’t. There were, maybe, two things I liked and fifty that I didn’t. Pretty much says it all!

But most of all, I didn’t like the way I felt around him. I began not being myself around him, to make him feel better, diminishing myself, and to continually explain and endure him continually asking, ‘why’, and his snide remarks putting me down and general negativity began to wear on my self-esteem. The man was a total energy suck and I was was his place to feed.

We went our separate ways, but…

Through time, this man would try to re-enter my life (like gum stuck to my shoe) and occasionally when I was in a lull, I would interact with him. (I know, stupid!)

Five years later, he contacted me to ask that I stage a house that he had remodeled and had up for sale, for my monetary compensation, but he never paid me. He used me. (Remember, he put me down for my decorating style, but now, wanted my services.) During this time frame, I gave him a script that I had written, that had done well in awards and was at several prodcos and studios under consideration. He told me that he didn’t like to read, so probably wouldn’t read it. (Remember nothing about me was worthy according to him).

I met a real man that I fell in love with and got engaged and didn’t interact with this man any longer. Got him out of my life… I thought.  But he continued contacting me. I told him that I was not interested, but when I wouldn’t respond, he verbally attacked me… calling me old and wrinkly.

About three years later, he begged me to have lunch with him and like a fool, I felt sorry for him and did. BIG MISTAKE! My lack of responsibility was, that if, I was bored, or there was a lull in my life, I would interact with this sucker. I became a sucker for him to lick, take from, suck on and insidiously abuse. He craved my energy.  He even told me that he did. I needed him like I need a hole in my head.

I liked almost nothing about him.  One night at my house, he was drinking wine like it was water, and he blurted out that he always loved me, would always love me and that he always knew that we would get back together. He had gained a ton of weight, was almost 300 pounds. His face was fat and his body swollen as if filled up with air. I felt disgusted watching him drink as he inventoried my frig. I said jokingly to change the subject, “You will need to replace all that wine you drank.”

He wrote me a lengthy and pathetic email stating how much he cared for me (yes, I have it in my file) and inquiring, if I was seeing anyone else. Was the man I was engaged to out of my life, etc? All which was none of his business.(I was still angry at him for using my time and never paying me, regarding the decorating and when I inquired. He told me he didn’t have any money.)  He wrote in his whiny email that my remark, that he replace the wine ‘made him feel cheap,’ like I didn’t care enough for him to let me drink some wine. (Are you hearing this whiny BS?)

Good grief was all I thought. I told him that I had no interest in him, but friendship and that the wine remark was an off the cuff remark because he was drinking so much and so fast. Then I ended all communication…

But he continually emailed and called me. I would look out my window and see his car in front of my house. (The same car, he drove when I first met him….it had been years and he was still in the same place.) He put sweet cards at my door… and called emailed and texted over and over.

Finally, I answered and told him to leave me alone, but as we talked, I felt sorry for him and he convinced me that we could have some fun, I was in a lull in my life, so…(Don’t even say it! I know! STUPID!)

We hung out a few more times… and I don’t know why because I hated being around him. And every time, I was around him. I was bored and began to feel down. He stole something off my neighbor’s house. He thought it was funny. I thought it was appalling.

He began asking me all sorts of questions about my writing, like if the script that I gave him to read was ‘copyrighted’. All of a sudden, he was overly interested in my writing. He told me he had written a story, since we had last seen each other. I found this unbelievable, since, he told me that he didn’t like to read. He wanted me to put him on my website. He was sucking, sucking, sucking… 

So, after making fun of me for writing, now he’s written a book, and guess what? The leads and storyline are similar to the script that I gave him. He is also claiming to be ‘an inspirational writer’, after putting me down for my inspirational/spiritual writing, which I have done for over 20 years.

I finally really got it! And I got this man out of my life for good, but, in order, to do it, I had to be cruel. He kept whining that we belong together. That we have magic. That he only feels at home with me. He compared us to the movie, THE NOTEBOOK. Listening to him, was making me sick.

And I could not get rid of him. He would email me. I blocked him, then he would text me that he wanted to start over. I asked, ‘start what’ over? We were never anything.

He is a chameleon. He was dating a woman who remodeled houses, so, in that time frame, this is what he did. He smoozes up to women and they will ‘think’ he is a nice man, until they realize, he is an energy sucker… a USER…He asks ‘why and ‘how’ all the time. Why? Why? Why do you do this? How do you do that?

Oh and the ‘pilot thing’, he has never flown for a large airline and in all his years flying, he isn’t a Captain. He is a co-pilot and flies cargo. I have friends who are pilots and I have dated airline Captains and an Air Force Pilot, and not a one ‘goes on about it’ like this man. I have been around pilots all my life. My Father had a plane and  was a pilot and also my ex-husband and neither one went on about it, like this ‘fly boy’ who just has to be up in the air…

This man tries to give an image of being this ‘dashing airline pilot’. HAHA! No way! He claims to have been places, but he has no photos or memorabilia. He is on layovers flying freight, not any real traveling. This man claimed, for example, to have been in Saudi Arabia.. I asked him what he did while he was there… he said, “I stayed in my hotel room.” Get the picture?

He told me during the time that I was engaged that he was getting married to an attorney and moving to Florida… but guess what? The truth is, she was a legal assistant, cheating on him and dumped him for another man. This man lies, cons and spins as bad as Obama does… and oh yeah, he was for Obama!

He now lives in a crummy, filthy apartment, full of what is now, ‘beat up’,(he takes care of nothing) masculine (instead of granny) furniture that I selected, but was never paid for.

He hates his mother and sister (How do I know? He has told me on many occasions. He has even screamed it out at the top of his lungs). He sucks up to women who will feel sorry for and be kind to him. He is looking for a ‘Mama’, a woman to care for him that he can suck from. He is a gold-digger. He has never been married.

He is always the ‘poor
victim’… According to him, women cheat on him…Whine! Whine! Blah, blah blah! And I understand why. He is a complete con, bore and a whine baby. I have seen him throw tantrums like a two year old and he is close to fifty. So, get the picture?…

Energy suckers are insidious abusers… they may ‘appear’ mild-mannered, ‘nice’ and ‘kind’ and may even put on a front to the world that is in complete opposition of who they really are. They have ‘learned’ and practiced saying the ‘right things’ to get what they need. So, it can feel confusing. But, if you feel bad about yourself around someone and it seems a bit confusing…you may be with this type of an abuser…a passive/aggressive/energy sucker…

Energy suckers are emotionally stunted, kids who never grew up…they are vapid, empty, needy and insecure and will suck you dry, to try and fill their void with all you have as their nourishment, if you allow them to.

Insecure people are threatened and jealous of confidence, happiness, inner peace and things that they know not of, or things that they want to claim as their own. Many like this man, will steal ideas, thoughts, and even identities… and may commit plagiarism and worse. I have tried to confront him, concerning ‘his book’, but now he is avoiding me. He is now living the persona of a ‘writer’with a hype and con award ‘nomination’ that he paid a fee for, in order, to put a sticker on his ‘self-published’ e-book. 

So, the purposes and moral of this tale….

We all feel insecure, at times, and to have the self-awareness of why you are feeling a certain way is the key to growth and healthy relationships.

And when there is a lull in your life, it’s better to let there be a lull, than to fill it with an energy sucker because each time, they will suck more. You are only a place for them to feed. Each time, this man entered my life, he took more….I allowed him in, only because I was in a lull and bored, otherwise, I would never be around such a man.

Your relationship with yourself is the most important one. Listen to your gut and how you feel, don’t negate it, even if you are in a lull.

Had I listened to my gut, I would never have gone out, more than once, with this passive/aggressive/energy/sucker…

Being kind, or bored is not the reason to interact with someone, when your gut screams otherwise…

That which is attracted to you, will try to define you… so guard yourself well…

Have you ever had experiences such as this…?

How many of these traits do you possess?


The true definition of integrity comes from the Latin word integritas, which means “whole” or “intact.” It encumbers all the traits that make a truly “good” person, such as honesty, being incorruptible, straight and morally upright. A person with integrity won’t lie. They will keep their word and won’t screw you over. They won’t go behind your back, badmouth you, go after another person’s partner or cheat on you. they adhere to a code of ethics that may make them predictable, but safe to the heart and one’s sanity. No unpleasant surprises come from someone with a high sense of integrity. They follow a code of ethics that tends to be, as the word suggests, incorruptible, and they adhere to principles of common decency.


Who wants to be with a coward? Someone who can’t and won’t stand up for their own beliefs will definitely not stand up for you or anyone else. Courageousness may not seem like such a big deal to some, but upon examining history, one notices that cowards are not too different from criminals. Why? Because most atrocious crimes to mankind would not have succeeded had it not been for the silent bystanders and those who looked the other way. No courage usually also means no principles, which will make you expendable for the simple reason that a coward will only do the least effort required and will tug tail and run when true work is required.

Sense of Humor

There will be good times, bad times, hard times and easy times. And everything is easier if one keeps a sense of humor, or at least surrounds oneself with those who have one. There is a reason that poll after poll shows that most people desire a sense of humor in their partners.

 Intelligence, Education and Common Sense

Plenty of people have high IQs and no common sense. Common sense, social intelligence and “street smarts” are pretty much the same. Being able to solve the most difficult mathematical problems won’t make anyone a great partner or friend, if they cannot hold a conversation, relate to other people and have zero social skills. Social skills or relating to others are abilities required to use common sense, which dictates what or what not to do or say in every day settings.

Emotionally Open

If you have ever tried to be friends or have a relationship with someone who has the emotional depth of a rock, you’ll know what I mean. How would someone who has a hard time feeling, or showing feelings, relate to you? There is a difference between someone who is so closed off that they just look at you blankly, or worse, scold you, or put you down when you’re feeling sad or miserable, and then there are those who break down as soon as someone looks at them the wrong way. Being able to share one’s heart doesn’t mean that one has to be a weakling or whiner. Someone who can’t feel is usually damaged goods, and lack of depth in emotional matters usually translates into lack of depth in other matters.


Kindness is like integrity. A person who possesses kindness will usually keep your heart safe and your best interests in mind. Their willingness to help others also translates into someone who knows how to put another’s needs ahead of their own when needed. A kind person carries a light, and that light tends to attract other “good” people too.


Everyone is low on confidence now and then. But stay clear of those with literally no self-esteem. A person without self-confidence/self-esteem spells disaster, because they will fail on numerous other “must-haves.” They are usually driven by self-preservation, and will do almost anything to overcome their feelings of inadequacy. This can make them psychotic and distrusting, and possibly even make them into stalkers. Which, in return, almost always ensures dishonesty, a closed heart/inability to truly feel and experience love and joy, a lack of integrity and definitely no courage. They’re usually a bucket with a huge hole in the bottom. No matter how much love and care one will pour into them, it will never be enough to make them feel safe, loved or good enough. It’s impossible to love and care for someone who doesn’t love and care for themselves.


Best to avoid those who have absolutely no discipline. It requires discipline to succeed in life. Anyone who throws in the towel at the first sign of difficulty or opposition will not make a great long-term companion. This is because discipline translates into stamina, i.e. staying power. A person who can’t stick with anything for a longer period of time because it’s uncomfortable, or means work, is someone who is either not confident or is lazy. If they can’t stick with their own goals, they won’t stick with you either.


Those who constantly complain about the money they don’t have, especially while spending it on things that don’t serve them, are not only annoying, but are also no fun to have around. The opposite of generous is selfish, and who wants to be with a selfish person? Being miserly also tends to show individuals who are very preoccupied with material, i.e. superficial things. Combine that with the constant complaint about not having enough, and you’ll get a good picture of how life with someone who can’t be generous looks like.


Self-awareness is the fine middle ground of truly knowing your strengths and weaknesses without being either completely weak and self-loathing, or arrogant and narcissistic. Self-awareness allows us to know when we are way off our rocker. It allows us to see when we are wrong/screwed up and need to possibly adjust or change certain behaviors and patterns. Self-awareness allows us to look in the mirror and see who we really are; not who we think, or hope we are. People without self-awareness cannot grow, because they will never learn from past mistakes. They are literally blind and lost souls, stumbling after what looks and sounds the most appealing. Without self-awareness there is no truth, just illusion; and a perpetual cycle of trying to find what they think will make them happy.

If you don’t know who you are, you sure as hell won’t know what makes you happy. 

Okay! Do you possess most of these, all of these, or very few?

Do You know Truth When You Hear It?

 ???????????????????????????????Leviathan is a three-headed devil deriving from the ocean and rules over twisting the meanings of words, so that nothing can be clearly understood in order to create fog and confusion in the world.

 Do you know truth when you hear it? With all the spin going on in our world today, it is making it more and more difficult to discern the truth. Twisting and spinning in the media, changing meaning, slanting outcomes, not reporting what actually occurs, but instead reporting what furthers ‘their’ agenda, seems to be the action of most in today’s world. It hits us from all sides, the TV, computer, radio and the Internet. Daily, we are bombarded with the fog of continual spin.

Obama and his administration are even trying to tell us how to speak, ‘changing’ the meaning of words, as in, what means what… as he tries to ‘change’ how we refer to, for example: ‘terrorists’.  Who are the ‘terrorists’? Obama and his administration are trying to rename patriots as ‘terrorists’ … Anyone that doesn’t buy, or is against the Obama spin is deemed a ‘terrorist’, instead of the ‘real terrorists’ being deemed as such. Obama and his administration are proving by actions and words to be the real terrorists.


We are being told not to refer to things as they really are and to not hear and see what we really see hear, or feel. We’re to believe what ‘they’ tell us to believe, instead of, what we know to be true. Just forget what’s true and believe ‘them’ instead. But they can tell you anything, and until you believe it, it’s not true.

Obama used the word ‘hope’ when he campaigned to get where he is. Hope?! Obama is taking away hope and in its place he is putting control over every aspect of your life.
It’s like a playboy trying to seduce his prey. He will compliment and tell her any and everything to get her, even “I love you.”
But once seduced by his spin, she is screwed, and he is on his way. That’s what is being done to America. We are being seduced and spinned. So, we can be screwed.Bill Clinton


Speaking of playboys…Clinton for example: Remember the Monica Lewinsky scandal? And Clinton pointing his finger at us through the TV screen as he said, “I did not have sexual relations with that woman.” When obviously, he did. And most all of us knew that he did and knew that he was lying. But lied, he did, and he lied as easily as he opened his mouth. Then impeachment hearings were started and that’s when Clinton stated. “It depends on what the word ‘is’ means?” A Leviathan master at work.

Now, Clinton is caught up in another scandal. That he told a man to step out of a political race to let another win in order to suit ‘their’ agenda. Clinton, of course, ‘denies’ doing this. And others deny it to protect themselves from the light of the truth. Liars always deny. How can anyone ever believe Clinton? He has  proven to be a blatant liar. Yet, he is still supporting candidates and blabbing spin in the media. It’s Leviathan at its finest.

 Look at Obama and Pelosi… they contradict themselves even in the same speech. Truth seems not to matter to these people and they must think that the masses can’t see through their lies, Leviathan spin, and self-serving agenda.


Anyone with a brain knows that we can’t give better healthcare to everyone at a lesser cost. It’s impossible. It’s a lie. It’s Leviathan. It’s twisted logic. It’s twisting words to lead astray. This bill is to enslave the people to the government and it is of pure evil.

Oh, it’s a lovely idea and hooks fools into ‘believing’  that’s it possible, but it can’t be done and it won’t be done. It’s only a ruse to take more of your rights and freedoms away and to give more control to the government.

Anyone with a brain knows that you don’t pass bills and sign them without reading them. Anyone with a brain knows that you don’t continue going into more and more debt to balance the budget. Anyone with a brain knows that what works is a smaller government that serves the people not the other way around.

 Leviathan seems to be getting stronger and stronger. This word spin devil causes confusion, twisting, spinning words and meanings, so that little truth is heard, and confusion abounds. The more confusion, the easier it is for people to be led to distraction then destruction. Many politicians and much of the media are in collusion with the devil Leviathan. 

Especially this current administration is counting on the inability of the people to discern truth as their Leviathanian tactics get stronger and stronger. ‘They’ think that if they say it often enough, spin it enough that the people will believe it. 
This exact statement has come out of Leviathan-controlled Obama’s mouth.

Obama denies that he knew what was being preached at Rev. Wright’s church and those caught in the Leviathan spin spell, believe him.


There are liars everywhere these days. Truth is the rarity. And when the truth is spoken, or revealed the Leviathan spinners come out to try and make the truth appear the lie. It’s spin, twist, deny and confuse.


We must get back to the truth of the constitution. Our founding fathers created checks and balances to curtail a take-over by liars. The founding principles are sound and have made America and its people the finest and greatest in the world.

One of the most important issues is that we be governed by natural born citizens. There sure is alot of smoke about this issue, even more than around the Clinton-Lewinsky cover-up. Where there is smoke, there is fire. So, ummm… is Leviathan spinning or what?

We are being led astray by many in the international field that want to weaken America for ‘their’ benefit and Obama’s backers are leading the way to the biggest push ever to this goal.

 America is founded on Judeo-Christian principles and there is a reason for this and this is the reason that America is what it is. THE LAND OF THE FREE AND THE BRAVE!


The Seven Deadly Sins are running rampant in our country and it is time to reveal them to the light of  TRUTH!  Instead of the Leviathan spin, that it’s okay to live this way.We’ve been led astray by the  evil Leviathan spin to believe that morals, standards, truth and honor don’t matter, when they are all that really does matter.


How do you discern the truth from all the lies? I say listen through the words, watch the actions and agenda, and how it feels to you deep down in your spirit.  If your spirit is true and you are true to your spirit, you will be able to discern theTRUTH!

And when someone shows you what a Leviathan they are BELIEVE THEM as in CLINTON!

Come back to your innate God given instinct of discernment.  We must hear through the evil of the Leviathan twist and spin to bring our country back to the truth.

‘They’ are afraid that we will see the truth. That is why they twist, churn and spin.

Wake up people! Hear through the spin and lies!  Hear the TRUTH!