An interesting dynamic…

???????????????????????????????Have you noticed when someone hurts you, they don’t like to be reminded of it, or to go over it, if you have the need to, in order, that they understand the full, extent of the damage they have done?

No! They want it all behind them, forgotten and gone.

Some seem to think that once they are done dealing with it that you should be too. And they may even become self-righteous about it.

These people, often times, will say, the past is in the past. It’s time to let it go and move forward… after a quick, “I am sorry”… or even a couple of “I’m sorry’s” they deem it’s all over and behind them. And things are good to go. Therefore, it should be over for you also. And if it’s not over for you.. they may respond self-righteously by word and attitude.. that something must be wrong with you if you can’t move forward and forget. They may admonish.. Can’t you forgive and forget? Can’t you go forward? They try to put the blame on you.
Well, how convenient for them.
Or they may say, I am a different person now, not the same at all, I have ‘changed’.
They know the only way it can/will be forgotten and to feel better about themsleves is when you will hopefully forget,  as they claim to have ‘changed.’ Or perhaps, what they did is so horrible that they don’t want, or can’t claim, or even think about it because to do so makes them feel badly about themselves. They don’t really want to look at their self, as to what they really did, who they really are, or to realize just how badly they hurt others.
But, if they won’t, or can’t hear your pain, until the time, ‘you feel’ that you have been heard, I say they have not changed. 
It takes strength to hear and own what you did to others in harm and many of the people, who cheat, have addictions, lie, con, twist, spin, steal and generally do harm  really are deep down very weak…. even spineless… 
Their hideous manipulative game is to throw others off so that it’s the harmed ones who begin to think that something is off with them, if they can’t go forward… 
I think that until the person is able to listen to the one they harmed, claim and understand it all and to ‘feel’ what the other felt enduring the harm, they are not changed, but still escaping as, perhaps, is what they did in the first place… escaping into addiction. The nature of these people is avoidance and escape and they are usually passive/aggressive in their behavior. 
People like this desire control over others and situations, after all, their addictions controlled for so long, so they still manipulate in that same vain whether they realize it or not.
So, until the one harmed feels that they have been heard and the one who did the harm claims it all … there can be no real change. 
What’s more self-righteous then a recovering alcoholic who boasts about how long they have been sober… so in need of attention for their accomplishment that it becomes like an addiction. They put it out there as if demanding you respond. “Good job!” Well, hey! How about those who have never been addicted and who have suffered from those who are. Where is there applause for surviving each day? Where is their “good job” for surviving? 
While I do think that ‘some’ people change, I think most don’t. And while I think forgiveness is key to letting go and moving forward. Forgiveness is not about forgetting… as in the past can be a strong indicator of the future.
If you forget the past, you will be doomed to recreate it and live it again. And that goes for people, relationships and countries. 
Many times, those who have wronged you, just want you to ‘believe’ that they have changed, so they can wrong you again. As in the abuser who brings gifts and flowers… then abuses again and the cycle begins anew.
Those weak of character have trouble, won’t, or even can’t really look at themselves deeply, or with clarity, so of course, they want you to forget about their past. So, they can forget about it, too. But in order, for real change to be imprinted and implemented, they must look deep into the pain that they have inflicted onto others and own it. Why should the one harmed be condemned to carry the pain forever? But, of course, that is when forgiveness can enter and release it. Forgiveness is mostly for the one doing the forgiving, not the one being forgiven. 
When one feels really heard, it is easier to forgive and thus the healing has benefits for both. A person who harms must hold themsleves accountable for that harm and not brush it off as in, ‘The past is the past, let’s move on.’ That is a flip statement, if all the depth of  pain, listening and understanding hasn’t been delt with in full.
Then the comment, “I am a changed person. You wouldn’t know me now.” I don’t know how many times, I have heard this… and it’s rarely truth. They are the same person, but have just acquired a different way to harm, manipulate, control, ‘side-step’, another addiction or escape. And that escape may very well be just a moving on past it all… I mean how tedious for them to hear what they have done to damage others. It’s just not worth ‘their precious’ time…onward to bigger and better things.. even if it’s onward to more harm.
I was, at one time, married to a man who was a cheater, a gambler and an alcoholic. After being exposed and caught, he spent much time ‘trying to convince’ me that he had changed…so that, I would not leave him.  I gave him some chances, but he never did change for more than a week.  I kicked him out of the house, after he told me he would never, never cheat again and that he loved me and only me. One week after he was gone, a suspicious letter came to our house addressed to him. I opened it. It was from an airline attendant that he was having an affair with in another state.
So gee! I guess his claims to change were a lie and a con.
Do you think people can really change, change their character and change their behaviors? Addictions create chaos in lives, and those addicted cannot be trusted because they are all about escaping responsiblity and truth. If they address their addiction, does their character really change? Maybe some do, but  perhaps, many only change their addiction, escape plan and route to get there. Run away. Fly away. Side-step. Hide.
At least, this is what I have found in my experiences. What do you think?
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Does Obama ‘care’?…

beigeIs the ‘affordable’ healthcare act really about health? Or is it more about gaining data and control over your life… even to expediting your death?
Obama’s ‘care’ is about government control of every area of everyone’s life…
And it’s just a piece of ‘their’ agenda… there’s gun control along with confiscating private sector wealth, as in retirement accounts being sucked into the government…


The take over of education, curtailing individual thinking to promoting brainwashing and changing the real historical facts into Obama’s dream and propaganda….
Control of the food sources as in Codex Alimentarius…
Spying on private citizens. Putting the IRS on those who disagree with the Obama agenda…
Quote Obama. ” I will have the most transparent administration in history.” When truth is, it’s the most hidden, corrupt and full of lying spin. The Obama regime controls the media like never before. They are the propaganda machine spewing lies, cover-ups and con. Truth is lie and lie is truth…
Obama promised. “If you like your doctor, you can keep your
doctor. If you like your plan, you can keep your plan. ‘Period,’ he said
‘Period.” That means no stinking conditions.

The Obama regime lies about everything.  Obama ‘care’ is only the tip of the iceberg that is melting America a free country into the hell of government control…
But does Obama ‘care’?…. NO! It’s his agenda to lie, con and screw over the American people to take over our country and insert us into the NWO… Agenda 21, in order to implement the death of  all freedoms… under the guise of fairness, equality and income distribution.
Lie and smile until you get close enough to slit their throats… 
Obama is slitting America’s throat… 
The death of America… that is what Obama’s ‘caring’ is…
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Men! Do you know the specifics of what your lady prefers?…

???????????????????????????????If she likes chocolate, is it dark, milk, or white? And what brand, does it matter, or not? What wine does she prefer? Pinot, Merlot, Sauvignon Blanc or….  and what does she prefer to drink with what?

What kind of flowers? What color and what type are her favorite? What brand of shoes does she love, and which designer makes her swoon when she wants to splurge on a bag or an outfit?

In jewelry, does she prefer yellow, or white gold, or perhaps platinum? Which gem stone is it… diamond, ruby, emerald, or sapphire,etc.? And what cut, cushion, pear, marquis or round? Does she like chunky jewelry or refined?
What colors does she prefer, in what applications and circumstances? She may love the color red, but not like it in certain things. What music does she like and when?
Does she like to sleep in long, romantic nightgowns, or pajamas and what mood makes her decide when to choose what?
Does she enjoy impressionism, cubism, or primitive, when it comes to art.. modern design, antique, or a mix of both?
Do you know your lady? Do you pay attention to her preferences? A wise, attentive and caring man will pay attention and know… only a fool wouldn’t. A selfish man is more concerned with his likes and dislikes and that the woman fits his needs. Men like this are not lovers, they are users and takers and will drain a woman instead of fill her up.
Ladies, wise up, if a man doesn’t pay attention … why not? Is it because he’s clueless, or is he not worth giving him your time and effort? If he doesn’t care enough to learn about you, why spend time and give your energy to him?  Women are natural givers… and many allow themselves to become drained in so doing. A wise man will find ways to fill his woman up and he can’t do that, unless he knows what she likes and doesn’t like.
A lover seeks to please his beloved. A taker doesn’t care and will just do enough to get by…in order, to get what ‘he’ wants… be it sex, attention, or just the thrill of the pursuit. He’s about feeling good about himself more than pleasing another.
A caring observant man knows what his lady prefers and he strives to give and to make it happen just like she wants it…
Many years ago, a man in pursuit sent me roses all day long.. all red ones. He filled up my living room with them. I don’t care for red roses. I like every color but red. (I discarded them all before they died. I couldn’t stand looking at them.)
Another time, a man brought me one single rose, my favorite color… (I treasured and enjoyed it) He really cared about me, knew what I liked, and took pleasure in pleasing me.
One right rose means more than vases and vases of the wrong color. One man was thoughtful and caring.. the other about himself, his pursuit, and showing off…
If a man doesn’t take the time and effort to know a woman, he is not caring and thoughtful in a genuine way. Now, some men can be taught this awareness, but others not.. because some will only do enough to get by and not really care.
Nothing is more attractive than a caring, thoughtful, attentive and caring man.. and nothing is more unattractive than a man who is all about himself.
“When over the years someone has seen you at your worst, and knows you with
all your strengths and flaws, yet commits him- or herself to you wholly, it is a
consummate experience. To be loved but not known is comforting but superficial.
To be known and not loved is our greatest fear. But to be fully known and truly
loved is a lot like being loved by God. It is what we need more than anything.
It liberates us from pretense, humbles us out of our self-righteousness, and
fortifies us for any difficulty life can throw at us.” – Tim

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Feeding the beast…

BO…the beast of big government. The government of controlling everything through over-spending, waste, bloatedness, incompetence, lies and sucking everything from the private sector. While those leading and working for the almighty government beast thrive as they feed their ego, have fake concern for the masses who pay their salaries and allow them to be where they are and get wealthy, while they supposedly ‘serve’ the America people. When they are really lying, conning and manipulating the government to achieve government control over everything.

Today, in my opinion, the government elections held for those who are placed there, have been corrupted to their core. Dead people vote. People vote multiple times. ID’s aren’t required by illegals and minorities when ID’s are needed to do most every transaction otherwise. It’s insanity! Why are illegals even voting? There are corrupted organizations backed by agenda-driven evil like Soros, Acorn, Move-on, the Muslim Brotherhood, etc. that do everything possible to create their desired outcomes. Nothing is as it appears.
The man who is now president will not release his records… who is this man really and where did he come from?
What was once for the people and elected by the people has turned into manipulation and corruption from those behind the scenes who control the voting, the candidates, special interests, the media, while they try to brainwash the masses as they create lies, spin and propaganda so outrageous that many can’t even comprehend the underhandedness of it all, therefore it is taken as truth. And most all the media is their bought and paid for propaganda machine. It’s like some sick and twisted horror show.
Lies have become truth and truth deemed as lie… Spin is the norm.
Government employees should be servants of the people. Those in the government are ‘supposed’ to be of service to the people, not the other way round. But as time has passed, those elected and otherwise placed, have become puppets with strings attached thicker than rope being pulled by those who profit off of, and get an ego charge off of sadism, despotism, theft, control, extortion, even killing and murdering of the masses, while they smile through their lies and pronounce how good it will be for all.
The perfect example: Obamacare is about control, not health. It’s about sucking resources from the people in the private sector into the almighty beast of the government. It was created in secrecy, presented in cover-ups, corruption, lies, and incompetence and done only for control.
Until we stop feeding the beast of big government and make them accountable to ‘we’ the people, the private sector, ‘we’ who pay our income into the government in the form of taxes to pay their salaries, support their outrageous spending and lifestyles, America will continue to be weakened and even falling into destruction toppling us into loss of all our freedoms as we become more subservient to the beast… we will become a socialist, a communist…a nation with no freedoms. We will lose everything that makes America great.
The Obama regime wants control over every facet of our lives and over every dime. They want everything controlled and sucked into the government then the government will decide what a person has or receives.
“There are two ways to conquer and enslave a nation. One is by the sword and the other is by debt.”~ John Adams, 1826
It’s an evil beast and it is time to stop feeding it!  Freedom must reign supreme again!
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