Class and refinement…

???????????????????????????????What is class? What is refinement and what defines it?

In my opinion.. it’s innate to a human being.. something that is either  there at birth or not then built upon throughout their lifetime. A person with class and refinement have it no matter where they are, what they are wearing, or what their circumstances…

They carry themselves with an air of control and purpose. They fit well into their body. Their behaviors, actions, and choices, for the most part, reflect thought and when they don’t, they learn from them, adjust and refine. They live  and express with an appropriateness of thought and action…

Class and refinement are shown and revealed in how a person speaks, the words they use, the clothes they wear, the place they live. Money can be in the equation, but doesn’t need to be. If they have a small house.. it is clean, orderly and appointed well. If they have only a few clothes, they are clean pressed, stylish, not faddish, and they are worn with the pride that reflects their class and refinement.  How a person respects and cares for themselves, others and their resources reveals class or not.

Class and refinement isn’t shiny nor does it glitter… but those with it do shine and stand out and apart. It isn’t something that can be ‘acted out’ or ‘faked’.. .as it’s innate and those who try to act like they have it or fake it when they don’t are made even more obvious that they do not have it.

Some people try all their life to attain it and never do. While others have it naturally and without effort. Actually class and refinement are effortless for those who have it. as it emanates from the soul of an individual and can be seen in their eyes.

It is solid, purposeful, deep and real… it’s innate to an individual… bred into them, then expressed into every area of their life. I think it comes from the quality of one’s soul and even possibly where that soul derives, then is expressed in physical attributes and characteristics… then into their worldly choices.

When you see someone with it, you know they have it… unless, one is too crude in their perceptions to even perceive it. It’s been said that those with class, refinement and innate style, oftentimes, pass unnoticed to the masses….those without the ability to perceive or to recognize it.  Class and refinement do not try to be noticed as it has no need to… it just is.

Style, dress, health, body awareness, carriage, expression, words, tone and quality of voice, gestures, manners, conduct, posture, actions, movement… refinement and proportion in features, body form and development… even when behaving silly and wild, class is still there with those who have it.

Persons of class, in my opinion.. Audrey Hepburn, Jackie Kennedy, Ronald and Nancy Reagan, Laura Bush, Ann Romney, Loretta Young, Mitt Romney, Dr. Ben Carson, Cary Grant….etc.

Are class and refinement being bred out of society? Look at the role models of today.. who has class? We have the Kardashians, Obamas, Oprah, Whoopi, Beyonce, Cher, Mylie Cyrus, etc…. the exact opposite, in my opinion, of class and refinement….And their life styles, mode of dress and behaviors are being emulated by the classless, ill-refined masses…

Have we lost class and refinement? Is it being bred out of society? Are those innately born with it becoming fewer and fewer as the world become more crass and the dignity of human beings is diminished… are class and refinement becoming things of the past?

Who can you think of in today’s world who have class and refinement?

Is it possible that we can revive class and refinement?

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Bring back shame and humiliation…

???????????????????????????????It seems any and everything are being accepted as fine and ‘okay’.

Everything has become so wishy-washy… no morals, standards, values, manners, class, appropriateness of dress, behaviors, etc..and our world shows it more as each day passes…

Morals, standards, guidelines, tradition, and appropriateness give a society boundaries to follow and boundaries are good. Sure, it’s interesting and fun to step a bit outside them, at times, but when all sense of decorum is lost and all boundaries are pushed and accepted, society falls into a kind of random insanity and chaos … where nothing has any real value or meaning…

Good becomes bad, bad becomes good, lie becomes truth and truth is deemed lie then confusion, chaos, immorality, lack of decorum in what’s appropriate as in dress and everything else, manners, personal dignity are lost and a society becomes savage-like…

When those with morals become the ‘outcasts’ and those of immorality become the standard … we have fallen into hell… a kind of Sodom and Gomorrah…

A moral minority exists now… that’s what I am feeling in the world. Little to nothing worthwhile to watch on TV.. so much focused on crime, sex, exploitation and sin in general…a continual pushing of the envelope until there is nothing left… but the abyss of hell…

Our leaders blatantly lie, con and spin for agenda as the media holds little accountable and contribute to the downfall of society.

Not much value is given to morality or healthy emotional standards. Our society has become lost and devoid of standards, values and goodness on almost all levels…

The over emphasis on sex and lack of control in many has become rampant. The sanctity of a human being is being destroyed. Human life means nothing to many and the lack of physical and emotional health are becoming the norm instead of the oddity.

It once was rare to see a fat person and fat at that time, was actually just a bit pudgy and these people were ashamed and shamed. Perhaps, shame should be brought back …

Only a few got pregnant out of wedlock or ‘before’ they got married and they were ashamed and shamed… People are having children today who have no idea how to even care for themselves.

Shame those who have children out of wedlock, shame those who have affairs and cheat. Shame those who are obese because of gluttony. Shame those who dress inappropriately. Shame those who don’t groom themselves healthfully and properly.

We are now accepting and tolerating things that we have not previously, in order, that no one feels bad about themselves. Perhaps, people need to feel bad and be ashamed and shamed, in order, that society rise to higher acceptable behaviors and appropriateness, instead of to lower.

The cries being now, “Don’t judge me. Don’t be a bully. Don’t be a ‘hater’…” PC rules the world and it is destructive to everything of value that of good. These mantras are destroying society… allowing for the idiocy and slovenliness of immorality, crassness, abuses to self and others, rudeness, etc. to flourish…

Many have lost self-pride, self-awareness and the ability to discern. This is what happens when a society has no standards, boundaries, or set standards and morality to live by.  All that’s left is tolerance… to tolerate that which is intolerable…

Society has been lowered to the ‘acceptance’ of any and everything… same-sex marriage, pedophilia, sexual deviates, perversion, inappropriateness of dress, cheating, lying, no manners, no standards, no guidelines, no family standards, twisted thinking, actually, more abusive behaviors to self and others are being accepted than ever before.

I say shame and humiliation needs to be brought back…

‘Political correctness’ and tolerance are lowering our standards to non-existent.

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Cheaters…

???????????????????????????????If you date, marry  or stay with a cheater be prepared to be cheated on because, if they cheated once, they will again.

Cheating is the behavior of those with a serious character flaw. A cheater has no respect for commitment either to a person, or for commitment that a person makes to another. And ultimately they have no respect for themselves. If a woman spreads her legs for someone who is married to another, she doesn’t respect herself, the man, or the woman he is married to and she certainly has no respect for marriage or commitment.

If a man sticks it in another when he is committed or married to someone else he has no respect for women, men, commitment or himself.

People who cheat in relationships are just as despicable in other places in their lives. They are at their core liars. They cheat and cheating is a lie and most continue to cheat one after another. Foremost, it is a lie to their self for their justifications and reasons for cheating…. then their self-lie vomits damage onto all the others they draw into their equation of deceit and betrayal.

When I discover a man or a woman has, or is cheating on their committed partner, I lose all respect for them and get them out of my life. Some people place no value on honesty, integrity, commitment or fidelity and this is destroying love, commitment, the sanctity of marriage and the integrity of family and it’s destruction to the children brought into these unions. It is a blight on respectable society.

Children reared in a cheating relationship are taught by example that respectively men, women and ‘commitment’ to love have no value. Therefore, they grow up fragmented in this regard … and either recreate this kind of behavior in their lives, or try very hard to not be involved in this type of experience. But the imprint on them from the example in their childhood may create blinders where they may very well choose exactly what they don’t want.

My first husband was a cheater, an alcoholic, a gambler and a fraud to everyone he interacted with. I vowed to never marry a cheater or an alcoholic, but I blindly married exactly what I never wanted. I was reared by functional alcoholics and a father who cheated on my mother. He thought I didn’t know but I always did. I heard him talking on the phone to a woman when I was a teenager and my friends saw him out with women at local clubs and told me about it. When I got older, I took it upon myself to meet one of his women even as I tried to block this knowing as it repulsed me to my core and I vowed I would never have this in my life, but I did.

Later in his life, my father confessed his cheating to me and told me that he wanted to leave my mother several times and wished now that he had. It was strange to hear this from him as previously when I confronted him, he denied what he was doing. Denying is the main tool of a cheater. They deny and deny. Keeping up their image is important to their identity… trying to think and give the ‘image’ that they are a ‘good’ person, when they aren’t. Because what they are is a cheater and a liar. It would have been better in some regards, had my father been honest and left my mother, instead of living a lie that I had to endure.

When someone is cheated on, it is about the cheater. It is their immoral, corrupted character and the only thing to do is to get away from people like this because these people very rarely change. They are corrupted in their souls. They have a lack of respect for others in their souls. They steal, lie, and cheat. They are looking for something outside themselves to make themselves feel better and it doesn’t work so they just keep it up… just like an alcoholic, or any person who is addicted.

This behavior also spreads venereal disease…and oftentimes to the innocent victims of this sin. Cheating is a vile and corrupt character flaw and there is no excuse for it.

Bill Clinton and his debacle with Monica … put cheating on the forefront … when he stated that oral ex wasn’t sex. HA! And to ‘some’ he made ‘cheating acceptable’. What a rank man this slime is and for Hillary to stay with him after such blatant cheating, is a horrible example for women and society … and we all know what liars, cheaters, corruption even murder these two have inflicted upon society. As I have written before, I met the woman that Clinton had a long affair with while married to Hillary. This woman is a singer and she was preforming at a party I attended.  I spoke with her before realizing who she was. She had cold empty eyes and appeared needy and cheap in my estimation. Then a friend informed me of her notoriety… She has written a book about her affair with Clinton….. how tacky can one get?

Cheaters are at their core cold, unfeeling people because to cheat on someone or to cheat with someone when they are in a committed relationship is a self-serving act and to do this a person is cold and places no value on what they are doing to others.

Years ago, I was asked out by a famous actor who at the time was separated, but still married, and known for his womanizing.  I turned him down flat. Much later, he is in the news for having throat cancer and he attributed this to his having had oral sex with infected individuals.

Wake up world! The spreading of venereal diseases is a symptom of a corrupted society.

Cheating isn’t exciting or glamorous… it’s skanky! And those who participate in it are of low moral character and nothing about them is sexy, attractive, loving, sensual or desirable .. they are a disease and blight on society.

http://youtu.be/uTRP-pqr3hs

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If you value something, it’s because you make it so…

???????????????????????????????What you value and prize is your decision and choice. Haven’t you observed someone value something like an art object and you place no value on it? Or someone likes someone or something so much and you place no value on them or it…

What you value and think of as special is individual. Value comes from how you were reared, the importance placed by those around you, those in your world, the society at large and what comes to be meaningful to you and it comes down to individual choice. It’s guided by your individual value system.

Couples or friends won’t stay connected if they don’t have pretty much similar values on the important issues in life. Our values and what we ‘prize’ define who we are and each seeks their own level.

I value honesty, morality, cleanliness, love, romance, body-mind-spirit connection, health, purity, monogamy, punctuality, manners, commitment, simple style, art, beauty, quiet, good teeth, good food, preciseness, creativity, intellect, sense of fun, fine things, education, continual learning, the ability to enjoy and appreciate, a sense of order, quality, physical fitness, the American way, the constitution, freedom, human life, Christ and my connection to God…. not necessarily in that order….

So someone who doesn’t share or meet with most of my values or agree and honors them, I would not want to be around, nor them me… as we would clash and conflict…

When we care about someone, we respect what they value.

What we value defines who we are. What a society values defines how it lives.

Have you thought about what you value and how it defines you and your world?

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Fake it till you make it and it will all be cool…

???????????????????????????????Fake it till you make it’. This is the mantra with some in the ‘sales’ arena and those spewing their ‘new age spiritual’ advice.

What is meant in my estimation and opinion… is to appear confident even when, perhaps, you don’t feel that way, in order, that you may rise to success…

But the negative aspects to this ‘fake it till you make it’ mindset is that some people have taken it to a level of … I don’t need to know what I am doing. I don’t need to be honest. I don’t need to have skills. I will just ‘fake’ it all. I can fake it by lying to myself and others and if I am believed I will be a ‘success’. If I learn to fake it and get really good at faking it, I can be a success by ‘faking it’.

Example: People fake being happy. The adage being, if you ‘act’ happy then you will be happy and attract happy people to you.  But this is certainly not always the case. People need to feel what they are feeling, whatever that feeling is… sad, happy, glad, mad… it’s all apart of being human. And faking feelings can lead to suppression and this can lead to drinking, drug use and other addictions to assist in feeling happy where happy doesn’t exist.beige

Also, there are very evil and corrupt people who prey on happy people. If someone ‘appears’ to have it ‘going on’ predators, sociopaths and those of evil will attract and attempt to prey on it, take from it, or take it down.

Like kind attracts like kind and also opposites attract…

So if you are genuinely happy and have a happy life be prepared to have others who are ‘faking being happy’, try to suck up to you, enter your life for their benefit and try to take from you.

Hiding behind fake feelings is not good for your emotional or physical health. And if you fake things often enough, you may soon lose the ability to know what is real and what is reality. Some even fake being in love to attain sex, money or other benefits. It’s become pretty much a fake world with some and on varying levels. Think the prostitute who fakes attraction and sexy then says what she needs to, in order to be paid.

Ever asked a friend, “How are you?” And they respond ‘fine’… when you can see that they are not fine. Some people keep up the facade, so that others won’t know the ‘truth’ of their life, what they are really feeling, or what they are really dealing with. And faking it takes allot of energy. In fact, it is exhausting to be a fake… and why so many fakers turn to drugs, alcohol, food and sex addictions, etc. to keep themselves propped up. Also, ‘faking it’ and not honoring, accepting and expressing your real feelings and emotions leads to illness…and fat, many fat people stuff their emotions with food. Trying to stuff down real feelings and emotions and it doesn’t work, it just makes them fat and miserable.  And just observe the fat we have walking around these days…

You know the story of the abused housewife who kept up the happy family facade until she turned up dead. Her eyes were always sad and her smile fake… as she said all was well.

And those people who speak in that fake kind, calm voice when trying to project something they are not… to get what they are after…when you can feel their inner tension and agenda. It’s sickening. And if you are in your real self and intuition, being around people like this will actually make you feel ill.

Then the holy rollers… those who are so self-righteous… spewing their dogma… while they cheat on their wives, prey on the young, or their community for donations.

And we now have a ‘president’ who faked it to get to where he is. Obama is completely fake. I intentionally did not capitalize ‘president’ because, until Obama is out of office I have no respect for the office.  Obama is a media creation and a fake. And perhaps, how a person such as this arrived to be where he is, is because the world has become so fake. If someone says it, it’s believed, whether it is true or not. The media, now-a-days is the fakest racket that there is…. they spew lies and propaganda for agenda and many in the masses believe it to be truth. The media propped up and covered up for the Obama dog and pony show… and so now, we have FAKE president!

Many reality ‘stars’ actors, politicians, media persona are ‘ fake media creations’… They fake their persona in order to become a household name. You may admire their fake facade, but if your really knew the truth… not so much.

People like this manipulate the world by being fake while they manipulate and fake out themselves along the way.

Oprah promoted a man, Eckhart Tolle… One of his quotes…
“Internal and external are ultimately one. When you no longer perceive the world as hostile, there is no more fear, and when there is no more fear, you think, speak and act differently. Love and compassion arise, and they affect the world.”

This is new age BS… when at first glance, it ‘appears’ great, wise and the way to be…

But if you aren’t living your real and true feelings and being authentic to yourself, you can’t even get close to this… and faking who you are will create chaos in yourself and your world. Example: if you no longer are able to perceive a situation as hostile when it really is hostile and you enter thinking it is loving… then you can be harmed very badly.

You can be feeling bad internally and bring good things to you and you can be feeling good internally and bring bad things to you…

Just ‘thinking’ something is a certain way, doesn’t make it so…

Our ability to perceive fear is a gift from God and only the stupid would ignore it. Beige bench 2 Denying fear and that evil doesn’t exist is what Satan wants.

So, ultimately and in its entirety, in my opinion, this quote is BS.  Also in this new age BS what is occurring is that people who are trying very hard to ‘feel good’ internally all the time then when they have not so good things happen to them, they think it is their fault, in that, they must not have been thinking ‘good’ enough or being ‘good enough’ internally. And this brings about self-shame, self-remorse and self-guilt.

The deal is to feel and to be honestly who you are. Feel what you are feeling so it can pass through you… so you can be in your clear God-given intuition… instead of some dream state that all is well when it isn’t.

How about saying to yourself. God give me clarity of mind and emotions in order that I see and perceive things as they really are, not as I want them to be, but as they actually are. As when you see clearly you are able to respond appropriately.

I have met new age people who try to ‘act’ nice’, ‘polite’, ‘good’  and ‘happy’ who are anything but…

When you are real within yourself with your feelings and emotions and express them appropriately… you are able to better perceive what is real and what is fake. And this will better serve yourself and the world.

Why have people become so afraid of what they are feeling? Is it because fakes like Oprah and other new age gurus have told us that it’s not okay? When you feel unhappy, feel it… when you feel fear know what you feel. So that you can protect yourself.

I like real people. Those who feel what they feel and express it appropriately. And some people fake being real (like in my opinion Oprah) in order to further fake out the world for their use and benefit.

I think one reason we have a fake for a ‘president’ is because so few can handle real. And people like Oprah have done harm to this world by assisting in creating this facade.

There are people in this world who will smile and be nice until they get close enough to slit your throat.

We are living in a time when truth is lie and lie is truth…

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