Once a cheater, always a cheater…


Is this always the case? Many times, yes, but in some not. While individual studies suggest that two-thirds of cheaters become repeaters (serial cheaters), it’s important to note that the likelihood of a partner repeating infidelity depends on certian factors. These factors include maturity, influence, personality, acceptance of fault, regret, neglect, and the final outcome.

Maturity

Age is a big factor in cheating. In fact, it could be said that infidelity and immaturity go hand in hand. A study consisting of 145 students (average age 23) found that nearly 70 percent had thought about cheating on a current partner, while 41 percent had completed the deed. Fast forward to age 27, and 54 percent reported being tempted, with 39 percent going through with the act. The magic age when men and women begin to settle towards a 25 percent infidelity rate is after 30. When young couples are pushed, they often try to avoid commitment by cheating, but this is often outgrown with maturity.

Influence

Studies show that there is some correlation between the types of friends a couple has and their likelihood of cheating. According to these studies, 77 percent of cheaters have close friends who are also engaging in some form of unfaithfulness to their spouse/partner. If you want a partner to stay faithful, it’s best to offer them the influence of other happy couples. You may not be able to choose your partner’s friends, but you can choose the couples you spend the most time with.

Avoidance-Detachment

The avoidance-detachment personality describes a partner who is constantly pulling away, looking for ways to distance themselves from the relationship. This can occur when people are young and unprepared to settle down, but it can also be a sign of someone who is constantly afraid of intimacy and commitment. When one avoidance-detachment personality exists in a relationship, infidelity is usually not far away. Cheating can be one of their favorite ways to create a wedge between their relationships. If you find yourself in one of these situations, your chances aren’t good, unless your partner admits their problem and seeks help.

Acceptance of Fault

People often estimate the likelihood of an affair by the amount of charisma/attractiveness one partner either has or doesn’t have. Interestingly, 88 percent of all affairs occur with someone who is not any more attractive, charismatic, or sexy than the cheater’s current partner. Furthermore, most psychologists confirm that the reasons people cheat usually have more to do with how the cheater feels about themselves, than how they feel about their partner. In other words, it’s more them than you, so don’t let them tell you otherwise.

Remorse/Regret

As many as 70 percent of affairs end with the cheater feeling sick with regret. In these cases, the cheater may be transformed (relationship rekindled) if the victim is able to bring themselves to forgive. Cheaters who are less likely to repeat show sincere remorse for their actions. Instead of excuses like “It’s your fault,” “It was an accident” or “It meant nothing,” they take full responsibility and express the need to prevent it from happening again. They’ll open up about their feelings, attend counseling, and do whatever it takes to regain your trust. In cases like these, it’s possible for a partnership to actually emerge stronger than it was before.

Neglect

According to surveys, nearly 50 percent of cheaters cheat because they feel neglected by their current partner. This can either mean a lack of emotional or physical (sexual) support. In relationships where both partners feel loved and satisfied, the chances of infidelity decrease. Keep in mind that out of the remaining 50 percent, a good portion of these cheaters actually report being “happy,” so this is more of a preventative measure than a guarantee. (I think the neglect excuse is just that an excuse.) Get a divorce or end the relationship if you ‘feel’ neglected before you begin dating.

Final Outcome

Some researchers believe that another indicator of a serial cheater is the severity of the penalty with which it was received. Cheaters are less likely to fall off the wagon (so to speak) when they’ve had to work through hardships, including guilt, embarrassment, having their life put under a microscope, and attending counseling. Cheaters who get away without punishment will likely continue to cheat simply because they can. Cheating has become an unhealthy dynamic in their relationships. One that has gone on too long to be easily stopped. This is one reason why it’s important to act at the first sign of trouble and make it clear that such actions are unacceptable.

In summary, to avoid repeat cheaters, look at how each of these factors plays a role in your  relationship, and then weigh your love with what that little voice inside your head is telling you. You might eventually ‘forgive’ your partner for your own good, but don’t ‘forget’ and don’t be so quick to give them a second chance until they’ve earned it.

Even after presenting this…IN MY OPINION, there is no excuse for cheating except that it is pretty much a character flawGranted some may outgrow it with maturity, but most don’t. So, if you are with a cheater, it might be better to just get away. 

What do you think?

Holidays are over! No more over Indulgences…

In food…

Or shopping…                                                                         Or shopping….


Or Shopping! … REALLY… no more!!!                  Or extra liquors….


Or rich desserts.  I am cutting back!… Really!                              

REALLY!

I AM!!!   ….. I am! REALLY!

….Oh well! Perhaps….tomorrow…

Then tomorrow came and…

Oh well! There’s always the day after …. Oh! Who am I trying to kid?

I am Exploding about Government Greed…

by Ann
Government Greed is going to destroy our great country. As the government grows infiltrating into every area of our lives bloating out its need for more and more from the private sector, it is only making us all more subservient while harming job growth and abundance in the private sector.

We don’t need government interference in our lives. We need to SHRINK the government, NOT grow it!

This current administration is the worst that has ever existed. Obama has no idea how to run a business much less a government. Or as a ‘community organizer’ is he doing exactly as his handlers and backers instruct him to do? All the recently passed legislation was sitting there waiting for a liberal puppet to push it all through.

He and his backers and handlers are trying to turn us into a socialist country where they ‘control’ everything and next will come communism where they ‘take’ everything.

 

“I PLEDGE RESISTANCE, TO THE CZAR, OF THE DIVIDED STATES OF AMERICA, AND TO THE COMMUNISM FOR WHICH HE STANDS, ONE SOCIALIST, WITHOUT GOD, DIVISIBLE, WITH HEALTH CARE AND WELFARE FOR ALL.”  Ellen Dannan

Is the above quote what we will all be pledging soon? It will be, if we don’t stop this runaway socialist train dead in its tracks!


The government takes tax dollars from the private sector and pays themselves excellent salaries and benefits as they expand government agencies ad nauseum.  So, of course, they want higher taxes to support their lifestyles and jobs. And, of course, they want more and more bills passed that take more of the private sector’s income. Greed, control, power over the people has become their motto and agenda. Achieving this, they are set for life and satiated in their power hungry and greedy souls. This  has nothing to do with good, or doing good for others. In fact, it is the exact opposite of good… It’s EVIL!  It is  GOVERNMENT GREED!

The government acts like they own our incomes, our lives, our very existances, as if at birth, we become owned by the government. Our children’s inheritances are taxed to the hilt for government use, and ‘they’ think and behave like we have no choice in the matter.

As they take from us, they put us down. This current administration is actually INSULTING America and its people as they spend, spend and spend our money!

Government medical coverage, vacation benefits, and retirement plans are better than most in the private sector, except at the highest company levels.  How did this occur?  Government unions are one reason. These unions are run by government employees who are paid with taxpayer dollars to screw the American people who are the actual employers of all the government employees.  How MESSED UP is this???!!!

The American worker pays these people salaries, benefits and retirement.

THE GOVERMENT WORKS FOR THE PEOPLE!  WE ELECT THEM!  HAVE THEY FORGOTTEN THIS AS THEY TAKE MORE AND MORE OF OUR FREEDOMS AWAY??!?!?!? Stating that it is for our own good, when it is for their good, not ours! DUH! Anyone who can’t see this is clueless and must be brain dead walking around in some FOG!

To observe the government workers, the ones that we put in with our votes, being incompetent, wasteful, arrogant, and self-centered disgusts me. 

The government tries to blame private business for any mistake that is directly, or indirectly actually the fault of the government… 9/11, the financial meltdown, the BP oil spill, our dependence on our enemies for oil, the space program, insecure borders, our high debt, weaker military, a split country, high unemployment. Then ‘they’ ‘tell’ us that the government can ‘fix’ it all.  

 
If I were President, I would fire every radical extremist in the government, reduce the number of departments, reduce the number of employees. Get rid of all government employee unions and roll back government spending.

Support and strengthen the military with the best equipment.

Repeal all the Obama socialist laws.

Secure our borders and enforce all immigration laws to the letter. Return the Pledge of Allegiance and singing of the National Anthem to schools along with the saying of prayers.
 
No one would dare send a bill to my desk that was NOT paid for in advance. No bill would be sent to me, or passed with earmarks, or any kind of inappropriate spending. No one would send me a bill that appeared to be unconstitutional, or that did not first and foremost take in consideration the
will of the American people.

Bills would be available to all Americans for plenty of time for their review and that no bill would be voted on by Congress until it was fully read and understood by those voting on it. 
 
Terrorists and traitors would be punished to the full extent of the law and they would be called what they are, instead of some ‘politically correct’ BS!

I would open up every area of our country and waters to the discovery and production of any and all natural resources and desolve any government agency that failed to do their job properly.  There is little to no accountablity in the government. It has become a bloated, greedy mess of incompetents. 

Follow the constitution as to its original intent. These are just some of the things that I would do, if I were President. Perhaps, we need a housewife in there to really balance the budget!

Our government has become arrogant, big spending, foreign to the American people, inefficient and incompetent. 

Obama, his associates, backers and handlers need to be investigated. Obama should be tried as a  traitor to the American people. Nothing that he promotes is good for our country, or our people. 

He and his wife insult America at every turn. Then when they see that their ratings are going down, they ‘change’ their ‘rhetoric’ to try and ‘sway’ the masses. Their insincerity and con are the only transparency that we see in their administration. They are doubling talking, dictator-like puppets of those with an agenda that will ‘change’ America into something hideous and repressive under their control  and of the elite that ‘think’ they know better for your life,  as ‘they’ gain more wealth and power. 

What have we done to ourselves and our country?  The government is ‘supposed’ to SERVE the people!

Be aware that Democrats believe in larger government. Republicans believe that less government is better. This is simplistic, but how can more government ever be better?

It can’t!

We, the people, can’t support it.
It will take our whole country down. Then the government will just come and take everything that we have, including, perhaps, even our lives. The government is a greedy monster out to take, control, manipulate the masses in order to sustain itself.
 
What, we the people, pay the Government should be more like a small maintance fee, with our being in control of them, not them in control of us…

There should be no death, or estate taxes as this is actually double taxation.

We should be able to decide who and what is done with our estates and who we leave the money to, with absolutely no interference from the government.  Family takes care of their families. Government butt out! The government wants to do away with family and business wealth in the private sector and claim it as the government’s… this is a dictatorship. Confiscation of wealth is unAmerican! It is what our founders came here to get away from.

We have allowed this to get way out of control and it is time that we SHRINK the government. Fire them all, if they don’t listen to us. Fire them and start all over again!

Let them be the unemployed. And their retirement and pension needs to be reduced considerably…

SHIRINK! SHRINK! SHRINK the government before it destroys the American dream and our way of life!

Close all our borders! Limit all foreigners from entering our country especially from Muslim countries and countries that don’t like us and our way of life. The reason the Government won’t do this is because of ‘secret’ deals and agenda to bring in ‘more’ to vote to keep them in office, to destroy America from the inside out. In my opinion, that is what Obama, his backers, handlers, and associates are after.

The greedy government knows real Americans see through their self-serving agenda
.

Otherwise, why and how did we let immigration get so lax? Also, if foreigners want to live in America, then they need to adapt to our country, not us to them. Speak English, dress American, and become legal!  If they don’t want to speak and be like us then they can go back to where they came from….Why are they in our country anyway? Is it to ‘change’ us and make us like them? Well, we don’t want  or need to change!

America is the greatest country in the world and it is this way because of our consititution and our freedoms and our free spirited people!  

This is my opinion… 

What do you think? Let’s discuss…